


Kanashimi wo Yasashisa ni

by Haehyukismyotp



Category: Naruto, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Character Death, Crossover, Gen, child oc
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:42:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 87,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21731500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haehyukismyotp/pseuds/Haehyukismyotp
Summary: A master in the covert arts of espionage, infiltration and subterfuge, an expert martial artist, with exceptional agility and athletic ability. This is who you once were, now however, you are the youngest child and little sister to the head family of the Nara clan. With an uncanny ability to see a future that is to come, you do everything within your power to keep the peace.
Comments: 38
Kudos: 123
Collections: Amazing OFC fanfiction





	1. 다시 태어난 것 같아요

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back! Hopefully this makes up for the longish wait. I didn't change much this first chapter but I've made major changes to the story as a whole so please look forward to future chapters! Right now I'm updating chapter four so hopefully I'll upload chapter two once that's done. 
> 
> Tell me what you think about the new path this story is taking!

A world of darkness is all you knew, cramped, warm and unconditionally safe. While the first time you became aware of your predicament was a nightmare which would most likely result in some sort of childhood trauma, you had grown quite fond of your room. Sure it was as dark as Satan's butthole but wherever you were had to be luxurious because they could afford to have the heater on 24 hours a day 365 days a year. Well alright maybe not necessarily, Stark did love installing heat and air conditioning to all of their safe houses. Though it still had details which you found extremely abnormal.

One of those details was the fact that you don't recall ever eating anything while you were in this room though perhaps that was due to the fact that you never were hungry. It was alarming how fine you felt when you really should have been dead from starvation quite a while ago. You still remember your favorite and least favorite foods, you still remember how it felt to open your mouth and consume said sustenance. You do miss that, eating was one of your favorite pastimes.

Not because you were particularly out of shape but because you simply didn't have much else to do... but that was a thought for another time. Adding to the sheer eccentricity of the eating situation was the fact that it seemed someone always knew when you missed your favorite food because some time after thinking about said food, you swear you could taste it. Whichever deity was watching over you must have had a twisted sense of humor for that alone. 

Another perplexing detail of your black room was the noise. The most clear and constant sound you heard was a bassy beat, it was always there. Annoying and uncanny at first, this beat now brought you solace when you felt yourself breaking. Being suspended in a dark room for an unknown amount of time was every bit as scary as it sounds. 

You had been taught to hide your emotions at a young age, that brushing hurt and shame and disappointment and loneliness to the back of your mind is better than dealing with all those negative feelings. And it was. You went your entire life without dwelling on those pesky feelings, only crying a handful of times in the private confines of your bedroom. But here those feelings seemed to only intensify, and when they did only the steady and undying beat brought you back from the deep confines of your mind.

Another sound you now were able to recognize was almost human like in nature. It was heavily muffled and it wasn't in a language you could understand but you were sure that the sounds were made from people. There were many sounds, voices maybe too many for you to really recognize and place. However there were three voices which you heard almost on a daily basis, one of which you would bet all your money on being a woman. The woman was the one who you heard the most, she would spend hours on end just making noise. Maybe she was talking but if that was true then who was she conversing with?

Many times you had tried to communicate back with the woman, you tried talking, screaming, waving your arms and kicking your legs but nothing ever seemed to work in the way you wished. Whenever you kicked your legs out in frustration it would elicit laughing from somewhere outside your room. The woman would always chuckle without fail but sometimes there would be another voice or two that would join in. 

These other voices were a stark difference from the woman, one very obviously belonging to a man. His voice was deep and raspy, he didn't say much but when he did his voice carried an air of boredom. Despite this you found yourself craving to hear his voice, hearing his deep, rumbling chuckle was a treat and worth every moment you felt alone.

The third voice was different from the man and woman's. This voice was noticeably younger than the man and woman, not exactly prepubescent but also not a teen. You assume it belonged to a male preadolescent but you suppose it could also belong to a girl with a deep voice. 

Aside from the obvious age gap this third voice spoke in a sort of whimsical chirp. At times he seemed to mimic the older man's uninterested slur but he would always end with a gentle fondness. 

No matter how hard you tried to see their faces all you were blessed with was a black wall. It annoyed you to no end how they seemed to be free, able to interact with each other, able to move, able to see but alas there was absolutely nothing you could do to change that. Kicking and punching only seemed to amuse them, spurring them to chuckle and coo at your helpless state. Aside from your frustrations and your endless bewilderment of your lack of hunger you couldn't say this place was too bad.

***

Oh how wrong you were. What was once a cozy, warm and safe room now was a cramped, scorching death trap. What little room you had to stretch your body in was now nonexistent, you were constantly curled into a ball aching everywhere and wishing you could go back to the larger room. When had they moved you to a different room? How had they moved you without you realizing it? These along with many more dramatic questions circled your mind as you were constantly bumping against the black wall and some other rounded surface you had never felt before. 

Along with the cramped space came the unbearable heat. Your body had never felt so heated before, it was downright torture. Along with the heat came the motion sickness. Despite the room now being smaller you seemed to gyrate without meaning to. The constant motion, heat and tight space spelled out a world of hurt and agony for you. If you had been able to eat you would have thrown up a long while ago.

This torture wasn't just directed at you, the woman no longer laughed when you would move. Rather she sounded out of breath and almost in pain. Could it be that whatever was happening to you was also affecting her? Perhaps if your mind wasn't clouded with trying to keep your sickness at bay you could have tested out your theory but that didn't seem to be happening any time soon.

And just like that time seemed to fly by, everyday your room seemed smaller and hotter and everyday you thought it may be your last. The three voices were heard more frequently, both males still sounding amused of your state in some bizarrely fond way. Though you hated the situation you were in as long as you heard that steady beat you knew you would be okay.

***

Things were not okay. How they got worse, you weren't sure but things were not okay at the moment. You no longer could hear the steady beat that comforted you, in its place was a dull beat that progressively got weaker as time passed. Along with this new beat was the sound of the woman in very obvious agonizing pain. Both males were heard as well, the younger one sounding much more panicked though the older one's voice also carried worried undertones to it. None of this did anything to help your growing sense of dread. 

Your room was no longer a room, it was more of a latex bag that you had seemingly been shoved into. You could no longer move your body no matter how hard you tried, everything was growing impossibly tighter to the point where you seemingly could no longer breathe. Breathe. Had you been able to breathe before now? 

Somehow in all of the pain and chaos you found yourself questioning if you had been able to breath while you were in these dark rooms. It was most likely a way to take your mind off of the fact that your life was likely about to end but you seriously could not remember ever needing to breathe while in this room. And just like that, everything faded into nothingness.

***

"Yoshino I need you to calm down as much as possible, otherwise this baby won't make it!"

An angry blonde woman barked out the order as loud as the woman could without causing further stress to the second time mother. The blonde had been attempting to deliver this child for the past four hours, something was clearly wrong. One the hospital bed laid the wife of Konoha's best strategist and head of the Nara clan. 

Nara Yoshino had been in labor for the past 48 hours and she had been actively trying to push her daughter out for the last four. This wasn't her first child and she hoped it wouldn't be her last but this labor had been much more taxing than the one she had experienced with her first son, Shikamaru. This labor was so taxing that even the world renowned medical specialist and hokage Senju Tsunade was on the verge of panicking. Because of that Yoshino panicked, she had waited for so long to add another member to her small family, she couldn't just let her baby die because she couldn't push fast enough.

"Tsunade-sama, the baby's heartbeat is becoming erratic!"

Nurses rushed the birthing woman, inserting needles and giving her oxygen. Tsunade was no idiot. She knew there was something very wrong going on but she could not figure out what. She had personally overseen Nara Yoshino's pregnancy from the moment she discovered she was pregnant until now and everything had been normal. The child's heartbeat had been strong, there were no deformities detected throughout the pregnancy and the child responded strongly to chakra, a very good thing, so how on earth had things gone so bad in a matter of hours?

Just when she thought the situation could not get worse Yoshino began to hemorrhage. It was severe to have postpartum hemorrhaging but hemorrhaging while pushing was the worst possible outcome. If Tsunade didn't act fast then the end results would be delivering a stillborn and presenting a dead wife to Nara Shikaku.

"Yoshino, you are beginning to hemorrhage and we have yet to deliver your baby, the odds of your child being born alive are dropping every second. You either push her out within the next few minutes or we perform an emergency caesarean surgery however you must accept that there may be nothing we can do to save her. Do you understand?"

Without a second of hesitation the laboring woman responded.

"Understood Hokage-sama."

And so she pushed.

***

Nara Shikaku was not an easy man to scare, he had received his signature scars during the 3rd Shinobi war and he was proud of them. He could take down an entire platoon of Iwa nin and not lift a finger, the ninja of Konoha both feared and respected him and he was held in very high esteem as a force to be reckoned with by all of the elemental nations, yet in this very moment he felt fear unmatched like any other.

His wife's pregnancy had been a blessing, his only son had already graduated the academy and even made chunin. While his pride for his son soared every time he saw him fasten his chunin vest a small part of him longed for the days when his boy was no more than a tot. He longed for someone to need him like his toddler son used to, for someone to look at him like he was the best the world had to offer. 

Don't misunderstand him, he knew his son loved him but his son was now much more independent and had a much more realistic view of the world than Shikaku would have wished for. So when his Yoshino had told him that she was expecting he was overjoyed. That same night he introduced himself to his newest love. Donning his most gentle and loving smile he began to speak to his unborn child, promising to always protect and love them. He continued speaking with his child, feeling them grow. When they kicked for the first time he could not stop the prideful smirk that formed on his lips. His child was strong. 

Shikamaru had masked his surprise and joy at the thought of a sibling with nonchalance but Shikaku knew his son. Behind his face of boredom he saw a fierce determination to keep his mother and unborn sibling safe from any harm.

Announcing his wife's pregnancy to his two best friends and their respective families had been the most he ever smiled. Choza had shed tears at the prospect of spoiling a new niece or nephew, Inoichi had hugged him and gone on an entire rant about how the oldest of them three was probably having a mid life crisis. Ino and Choji both badgered Shikamaru into promising to bring his new sibling for play dates with Asuma, they were ecstatic at having a baby cousin.

The day Yoshino was scheduled to reveal the gender had been the day his entire world changed. Both he and Shikamaru had asked for the day off so that the entire family could be present during the appointment. Maybe Shikaku had already subconsciously dubbed his unborn child a boy, he had already raised a boy into a very fine young man so doing this a second time would be easy, still special but not life changing. 

But when Tsunade-sama had cheerfully announced that his child was a girl Shikaku's world stopped. A girl, a daughter. Nara Shikaku was going to have a daughter. He thought back to when Inoichi had been blessed with Ino, while he and Choza had spewed joke after joke about him being wrapped around her finger Inoichi had simply donned a dopey smile and stated he wouldn't have it any other way. It seemed ridiculous then but now it was clear, Shikaku would give everything and more for his daughter. He was brought out of his high by his wife's hand tightening around his, a joyful sob escaping her throat. She wasn't the only one who grew emotional at the reveal, Shikamaru had on a very rare full smile and he himself felt his eyes grow wet as a smile erupted on his face.

Bringing himself out of his memories was a young nurse, most likely an intern from the Genin Corps, she brought news of how Yoshino's labor was progressing. It wasn't. The last four hours had him and his son waiting for any sort of update and seeing the nurse filled them with hope of seeing the newest addition to their family. Except they couldn't.

"Yoshino-san has been pushing for hours...baby's heartbeat slowed...emergency caesarean surgery...I'm very sorry..."

Shikaku wasn't sure he was awake. His wife was undergoing emergency surgery right now in hopes of saving the life of their daughter but was hemorrhaging badly before they put her under. His unborn daughter's health was deteriorating faster than they expected. This entire conversation could not be real, this was a nightmare right? He would wake up and the nurses would inform him that his daughter and wife were okay. He would wake up and the nurses would inform him that his daughter and wife were okay. He was brought out of his grief stricken silence by the nurses next sentence.

"In the event that we cannot secure the health of both mother and child, which should we prioritize Nara-san?"

No, they were not asking him this. How was he supposed to decide which life was worth saving in the event they described. His wife, his partner of 15 years, the mother of his son could lose her life right here, right now if he decided it. On the other hand his daughter could have life taken away from her before she even has a chance to experience it. 

Shikaku couldn't weigh Yoshino's life against his baby, he loved them both unconditionally and losing either of them would break him. In the midst of his emotional turmoil he heard his son sob. It wasn't a quiet sob either, it was one of anguish. Yoshino was Shikamaru's rock. While Shikaku could provide him with love and support in his own way Yoshino was usually the one who dealt with Shikamaru's emotions.

Losing Yoshino wouldn't just break his son, it would kill him. Even if he loved his little sister Yoshino was his mother, the one who would hold him when he cried, scold him when was lazing about and praise him when he completes his missions. Shikaku couldn't take Yoshino away from Shikamaru, not without losing a son as well.

"M-My wife, please, I'm begging you, w-we can't lose Yoshino."

The weight of his words seemed to hang in the air of the waiting room, the nurse's eyes showing nothing but pity for the anguished father and son.

"Of course Nara-san. We will do our best to save them both, rest assured that Tsunade-sama is the best medical ninja in all of fire country."

With that last statement the nurse quickly turned and scurried away, surely to relay Shikaku's response to the doctors in charge. Turning to sit in the hard, plastic chairs Shikaku could not help but hate himself and allow himself to be filled with guilt. He just possibly doomed his daughter, the very child he swore he would protect and love. 

He grabbed Shikamaru's hand in his, a quick look of his face revealing his own guilt on the situation. It wasn't a situation they had prepared for, the man renowned for thinking of every possible outcome and planning accordingly hadn't seen this coming at all. Holding his son's hand like a life line Shikaku did what he hadn't done in years. He prayed. He wasn't sure what he believed in but he prayed to every deity he knew and all the ones he didn't. He prayed that both his wife and daughter would be fine. He prayed for forgiveness in choosing his wife over his daughter. When he felt like there were no longer any words to say he did the next best thing he could think of.

Shikaku cried.

***

When Yoshino came to she was aware of two things only, she felt like she had just been torn apart by Kumo nin and also that her protruding stomach was now much more flat. As she slowly became more aware she also noticed her husband and son sitting in chairs next to her bed heads propped up on her bed, hair fanned out and obviously sleeping. This filled her with unfiltered glee, her family was here together now all she needed was to hold her baby girl and the entire scene would be perfect. 

She gently shook her husband awake, unable to hide her smile at the idea of holding her daughter but was quick to allow her smile to fall when she saw her husbands expression. It was painstakingly clear that something was wrong by the way he jerked awake as looked at her. Come to think of it don't they usually place newborns in the same room as their mothers so they can bond and go through feedings?

"Shikaku, where's our daughter?''

By this time her son had awaken as well. His expression showing unadulterated grief and sorrow. Dread filled Yoshino, something devastating had to have happened for both of her boys to be so affected. She was already connecting the dots but she didn't want to believe it to be true, this had nothing to do with her baby. Her baby was fine, the nurses probably took her to have normal test done. Tears quickly filled her eyes as she watched her husband inhale deeply and run his hands down his face. In this moment he did not look his age of 39, he looked far older.

"There were complications with her birth, you began hemorrhaging while delivering her. Do you remember that love?"

His voice was gentle, barely above a whisper. Yoshino nodded because yes she did remember, in fact she remembered everything up until they knocked her out for surgery.

"Yes, yes I remember that. I remember them preparing me for surgery as well. They were gonna save our baby's life because my body was too weak to deliver her on my own. Shikaku what aren't you telling me."

Yoshino's voice steadily rose until it was if they were having a normal conversation. Tsunade said they were doing what was best for both her and the baby, so where was her baby now?

"Yoshino, they encountered more complications during the surgery. It reached a point where a choice had to be made. They would do their best to save you both but in the event that one had to be prioritized over the other I chose you."

She wasn't sure she was hearing clearly. Her husband had not just said what she think he did. Yoshino felt all the air leave her lungs and struggled to regain her breath. Shikaku could see his wife quickly devolving into hysterics so he hastily added on what little news they were left with.

"She isn't dead... not yet at the very least. Her heart wasn't producing a steady beat and they couldn't get her to breath on her own but she was alive Yoshino. They took her into surgery as quickly as they detached her from you. We haven't seen her yet, but she's alive Yoshino. Our daughter is alive, she's fighting to stay alive. Don't fall apart when she needs us to be strong."

While it was better news than what she had feared Yoshino still could not stop a few tears from escaping her. Shikaku was right, he had to be strong, if not for herself then for her daughter and if not for her then for Shikamaru. Looking at the 13 nearly 14 year old she couldn't help but understand why Shikaku had chosen for her to be saved.

And so the family linked hands once again and prayed.

***

After a nearly 11 hour heart and lung surgery the baby Nara was introduced to her awaiting family. Tsunade wasn't one who believed in miracles, she based her opinions on facts and probabilities however after watching the tiny Nara who by every account should be dead open her eyes and see her parents for the first time she was certain that someone in a very high place was watching over that child. 

The baby girl would most likely need a heart transplant before she turned five and would also need to deal with pretty severe asthma but she was alive. Watching the family cry tears of joy rather than grief filled Tsunade with a sort of cheer and she felt herself walk away with a skip in her step.

***

Hearing that the surgery had been a success lifted the biggest burden Shikaku had ever felt off of his shoulders. He wasn't sure he would have been able to cope with the guilt of knowing his newborn had died because of a choice he had made. 

He saw the tension leave his son's shoulders as well, his eyes filled with hope, hope that his baby sister would be healthy enough to meet. His wife looked close to tears again, the young nurse had visited once more after Yoshino had come to, only to explain that in order to stop the hemorrhaging they had to remove her uterus. Yoshino would no longer be able to have children of her own. Shikaku saw the dread only increase in his wife's heart, if their baby died they couldn't try again in the future. 

But that didn't matter now because their daughter had fought and won. Their baby was alive, and Shikaku wanted nothing more than to just take her home and love her with everything he had.

The moment Tsunade entered the room with a small bundle wrapped in a baby pink blanket all thought left Shikaku. He simply watched as Tsunade carefully laid the small girl into his wife's outstretched arms. He vaguely notices that Tsunade is speaking to them, something about his daughter needing more surgeries in the future but he cannot bring himself to really process her words because all of his attention is currently being held by the absolute beauty in Yoshino's arms.

His daughter was the most beautiful thing he had ever laid eyes on. Thick, black waves of hair adorned her head contrasting Shikamaru's which was thin and straight, she shared his nose and ears but had full lips which at the moment were curled into the most adorable pout Shikaku had ever seen. 

Yoshino began softly speaking to her, coaxing her to open her eyes. She seemed to recognize her mother's voice because she let out the smallest of sounds, as if confirming that Yoshino is her mother. Soon Shikamaru is also trying to coax his sister into seeing the world for the first time, and it seems as though that does her in. Shikaku cannot help the tearful smile at the sight of his daughters onyx eyes.

"Both Yoshino and your baby need to stay here for a few more days but should be fine to take home by the end of the week. Her wounds will need to be redressed every three hours with a special salve we are making for you now. A nurse will be back with additional medication for her as well. She is considerably small despite being a full term baby being only 15 and a half inches long and 5.43 pounds. Despite this she seems to have taken the surgery well and shows no signs of her size being an issue. Do you have a name for her yet?"

This time Shikaku finds his voice, no longer soft and filled with worry.

"Ayumi. Nara Ayumi.’’ 

***

When you regained your bearings you were acutely aware of three details. First, wherever it is you were, it was cold as shit. Seriously, you felt as if you had been dropped in the snow and left to freeze and oh didn’t that bring back some memories. 

Second, you could not move. Whatever happened had now resulted in your limbs being strapped tight against your body. This wasn’t as restrictive as the dark room had been but nonetheless it still frightened you, at the very least whatever they were using to restrain you was incredibly soft and plush. 

Third, there was some source of light wherever you were being held. It was bright and burned you through your closed eyelids. How long has it been since you’d seen light, since you had actually been able to see something aside from black nothingness?

Regardless of how uncomfortable you felt at not being able to move and the dramatic drop in temperature you decided that this was better than the room. With time your eyes would adjust to being exposed to light and you would be able to be aware of everything around you. 

Despite not being able to open your eyes just yet and not being able to flail about you could feel that you were moving. Someone or something was moving you, carrying you almost like you were a baby. This led to more confusion on your end, if this was a person carrying you then they must have been giant and extremely strong. You weren’t particularly tall in stature and weight you did gain had been in muscle but this by no means made you easy to carry. 

As if confirming your giant human theory you heard them speak, you couldn’t place their voice. It wasn’t one of the three regular voices you heard while stuck in your room. Just as you were about to ask whoever was holding you to identify themselves and give you answers, someone else spoke. You figured they were speaking in response to the first voice and then you were being passed into someone else’s arms. Now not only did you feel the softness of your confines but also some sort of round pillow press against your side. These round pillows radiated gentle warmth and you found yourself pressing closer in an attempt to raise your body temperature. 

You heard what could have been a door closing but you weren’t entirely sure given your eyes still hadn’t adjusted to the sudden exposure to light. The person holding you began softly stroking you face, their warm finger easily cupping your supple cheek. Then the person spoke.

“My baby, my beautiful baby girl you’re finally here. I’ve been waiting for so long to hold you and now your here. Oh you’re so perfect, my perfect daughter. Open your eyes for momma, momma wants to see her baby’s eyes.”

Oh, that voice you did recognize, it was the woman you had heard while in your room. You still weren’t sure what they were saying, they spoke in a language that vaguely sounded familiar but you didn’t understand. Disregarding the obvious language barrier you tried talking to her, maybe if you told her your name and asked nicely she would answer some questions you had. You opened your mouth to speak but all you were able to produce was a small whine. That was enough for the woman to start talking again, she was close you could feel her breath fan against your face. Then a second voice joined the woman, the young male. Two voices you had come to love were here. You wanted to see them, to see their faces and know them. 

With every ounce of strength you forced your lids open enough to allow a sliver of light through, it was bright, familiar and comforting. Maybe the man and woman had wanted you to see them because their voices sounded much happier now. Slowly you allowed your eyes to open fully taking notice that everything was a mess of blurs, colors looked washed out and shapes were nonexistent.

As your eyes fully opened the man and woman stopped talking. You could barely make out a face not too far from your own, messy with tears and snot but smiling nonetheless. You realized that the soft round pillows were not pillows but breasts, you were snuggling into the woman’s breasts. Startled, you turned your head as far away from the woman’s bosom as you could, locking eyes with a young male across the woman’s bed. 

The lad’s eyes shone with an emotion you weren’t sure you understood, come to think of it you understood absolutely nothing about anything that was currently happening. Before you could begin to protest being held and ogled the same voice which carried you into the room spoke.

“Do you have a name for her yet?”

Completely lost and getting plenty annoyed you tried your best to wiggle free of your restraints, someone had better start explaining what the hell was going on or there would be hell to pay later. Tears of frustration gathered in your now tired eyes, a ball forming at the back of your throat and anxiety filled your empty and hungry stomach. 

Who were these people, why were they giant compared to you, why couldn’t you formulate words, where was your handler, what language were they speaking, these and many more questions needed answers. Before the first sob could escape your throat one final voice spoke. 

“Ayumi. Nara Ayumi”

As quick as your tears came, they left. They left because you knew that voice. Quickly your eyes darted around the room, when they failed to find the source of the voice you turned your head back towards the woman’s breasts. Your eyes locked with two teary, onyx eyes framed by short, thin eyebrows, a narrow nose, thin lips, a black goatee and two long faded scars running parallel from each other. One starting from the middle of his forehead curving above his right eyebrow and disappearing into his hairline while the other started just under the prominent stress lines under his eyes and faded into his jawline. 

The man’s voice was firm, whatever he had just said he was completely sure of himself and that comforted you greatly. Perhaps this situation was less than ideal but if he stayed with you then maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. These voices were your friends, if they had wanted to hurt you then they would have done so already. Your eyes stayed unwavering locked with those of the man, he was smiling you noted, a small kind smile which reassured you that you weren’t in any harm. 

Just as you let yourself relax the woman shifted her hold on you. She bent her legs so that you could stay propped up against them, giving you an unobstructed view of the three of them. 

_Huh come to think of it the kid kinda looks like a mix of the two adults, how peculiar._

As quickly as that thought came, it left because now the woman was undoing the thin gown she was wearing. Your confusion must have been clearly shown on your face since the man let out a deep chuckle, running a calloused finger along the right side of your face. Focusing entirely on the mesmerizing man you failed to notice that you again had been lifted and repositioned until something was pressing against your face. Startled you opened your mouth to protest only to have a nub fill the open space. 

_Okay, I’m sucking this woman’s breast. I’ve seen Tony do weirder things so this doesn-_

Your eyes widened at the very sudden realization. The size difference, breast sucking, the dark room, the inability to speak, everything you could remember started falling into place, like pieces of a puzzle. You weren’t being held against your will in isolation, your dark room wasn’t even a room to begin with. You were a baby. All of the fuckery before this had been your life inside of this woman, who you now assume is your mother. Did that mean the man was your father and the kid your brother, would you have to live your life as a baby despite having all of the memories of you past life? 

_I jumped off a cliff on Vormir for the Soul Stone, I died. How the hell did I end up here?_

Not allowing yourself to propagate a migraine you pushed all of your worries to the back of your mind and proceeded to do what seemed like the best course of action. You gently began to suck on the wom- your mother’s nipple. Pleasantly surprised at how warm and sweet the milk tasted you relaxed until you had your fill, finding your mother’s hold safe and comfortable. Your eyes felt heavy, you yourself felt completely drained despite having done absolutely nothing. Slowly you felt yourself drift off into a warm sleep, hoping you could enjoy this new family, this new chance at life, all thoughts of worry left you. All except one.

_Oh fuck, Steve is going to kill me for dying._

***

_Someone stood on top of a giant fox, they were wearing red armor and wielded some sort of sword shaped like an upright bass. Their hair resembled a lion’s mane more than human hair and they stood proud, power was rolling off of them in thick waves which made breathing almost impossible. His eyes were blood red, he had tears in his eyes but his posture told you he wasn’t sad, he was angry. Before you could further analyze the man an ocean blue mist surrounded him. The mist was humanoid in shape and as it slowly solidified you realized it was dressed in ancient samurai armor, a mask hiding its facial features._

_Then they spoke._

_“Hashirama, you must learn to submit to the Uchiha! If you do then I won’t have to end your life.”_

_A shiver ran down your spine. Every part of your training told you to get out, this wasn’t a battle you would have any chance of winning. Adrenaline coursed through your veins as you noticed who this God was talking to. The second man - Hashirama, as the God had called him- had long, straight hair and a massive scroll strapped to his lower back. His face showed remorse and anguish, perhaps he too knew that this fight was one sided. Just as you began to feel pity for him he responded in a tone that demanded obedience._

_“This is not the way to achieve peace my friend. We do not have to kill one another to live in harmony. I accept the Uchiha as a vital clan in Konoha, without you the village could not survive. Madara, you are and have been my friend since childhood. Do not make me hurt you!”_

_This seemed to enrage Madara, he let out a battle cry and suddenly the fox was attacking. Before the fox could close in on Hashirama a giant Buddah statue rose from the ground and restrained the livid animal. The air around Hashirama changed, it grew thick and heavy as prominent black markings appeared on his face. The anguished look was still there but beside it was something else, determination. This man was dead set on making his point clear._

_“Bold of you to assume you can even lay one scratch on me Hashirama! In order for there to be peace someone must govern over the masses, and that someone will be me!”_

_As that declaration left Madara’s lips both men leapt into the air. Madara swung his cello shield and scythe at the same time as Hashirama swung a massive sword. Both weapons clashed in a beautiful display of swordsmanship, both men never hesitating to charge and calculating their blows for maximum damage._

_You were completely captivated by the entire scene. There weren't many times you were left speechless because of someone else’s skill set but this was unlike anything you have ever seen before. You had to learn how they were doing what they were doing, if you did then your rank would skyrocket and you would no longer work under The Madame._

_As the thought entered your mind Hashirama destroyed the massive blue samurai and delivered the finishing blow to Madara, his sword completely penetrating his friends chest. There was no way any man could survive a wound that big, they would simply bleed out before any help would get there._

_Pain and a haunting look of defeat adorned Madara’s face. Hashirama too looked pained, if what he said had been true then the man dying by his hand was a long time friend. He bent down close to Madara and whispered something you couldn’t make out, attempting to hear the words you realized that their entire conversation before this had made sense to you. You could understand what they were saying, which meant it had to have been a language you knew._

_That’s right! In your line of work being multilingual was a necessity, travelling at the drop of a name forced you to become very familiar with different countries customs in order to blend in. You could feel the memories trying to break your focus from the men. You assumed that Madara had passed when Hashirama stood slowly and took a deep breath, his shoulders shook as silent tears made their way down his face._

_“I wish our paths could have been different, you were my brother and I loved you greatly. You do not need to worry Madara, the Uchiha will continue to be one of the noble clans of Konoha. Our father’s planted the seed of hatred in our hearts, but I promise I will not let it consume me. This valley will be dedicated to you, my brother, your legacy will live long after your death. I promise to bring peace to our village. You fought well, Madara.”_

_Hashirama’s words stayed with you long after he had left. You hadn’t felt the tears build in your eyes until you felt them dampen your pants. It was ridiculous how affected you felt by Madara’s death and Hashirama’s grief, you didn’t know them at all. As your tears fell you couldn’t help but let out a humorless laugh._

_Both men had been speaking japanese._

***

Waking up had been hell, something was definitely not right and that was ignoring the vivid and tumultuous dream. You’re entire chest felt like it had been set on fire, an incident which hadn’t happened in a very long time.

Completely caught off guard you let out an ear splitting wail, hoping that someone would hear you and come help. It seemed to have worked perfectly because your father all but sprinted to your side and began scanning your body in an attempt to see what was wrong. Throwing procedure out the window you allowed yourself to sob and flail your limbs, making a weak attempt to scratch at your chest. 

By this time you could see who was presumably your brother stand at your father’s side, worry and panic clearly shown on his young face. Your attempts to reach your chest seemed to have keyed in your father to what was wrong because he gently pulled your arms away and quickly ordered his son to leave. 

Once your brother was out of the room your father smoothly scooped you up into his arms trying to calm you down. He brought you closer to your mother and began to softly speak to you.

“Shh sweetheart, I know it hurts. Your brother went to go get the doctor so they can help you get better. C’mon baby girl don’t cry, be strong for your daddy.”

After being able to recognize the language everyone seemed to be speaking you understood what your father was saying. This confirmed that the kid was indeed your brother and that this was your new family. You wanted to stop crying, it felt unnatural to do so after not having done it in so long but the burning wouldn’t stop. If anything it got progressively worse which only increased the volume of your wails. 

Suddenly you couldn’t take in enough air to continue your tantrum, the ball in your throat seemingly tripled in size and obstructed air from entering your lungs. Panicked, you gripped your father’s fingers as tightly as you could, wet coughs tried to clear your throat but to no avail. Your father seemed to notice your lack of intake of breath as he carefully passed you to your mother and fled the room, presumably to threaten the doctor into seeing you at this very moment. 

Your stared up to your mother’s face, she had large dark bags underneath her eyes, her hair was particularly messy, worry lines appearing on her forehead and immediately you felt guilty. She probably hadn’t gotten much sleep since birthing you and now you had her and everyone else bordering panic. You wanted to tell her you were sorry, none of this was her fault, that if this situation wasn’t reversible you would be the easiest baby to raise. The most you could manage to do was nuzzle your face against her breasts and grip her finger but even such a small action caused you to go light headed. 

Just as your brain was about to shut down due to lack of oxygen the door to your room slammed open revealing your father, brother and a beautiful blonde woman. Said woman quickly took you from your mother and held a glowing green hand over your chest, the relief was instant. Greedily you sucked air into your lungs, you no longer were sobbing but tears still steadily made their way down your face. 

You turned your attention away from the beauty in front of you to your brother. He too looked worn out. You stretched your arms as much as you could his way, wanting to reassure him that you were fine. 

“Well would you look at that, she seems to want Shikamaru-kun to hold her. Would you like to hold your sister while we redress her wounds?”

The blonde woman was moving closer to your brother as she spoke, a mischievous smirk splayed on her face. Your brother looked conflicted as he spoke.

“Won’t I hurt her? I don’t want to cause any more pain than she’s already in.”

After voicing his concerns the blonde let out a slight laugh.

“Ah Yoshino what you said was right! All Nara men are dramatic sissy’s when it comes to family. She’ll be fine kid, if you haven’t noticed already, she's got a lot of fight in her. You won’t hurt her, and even then we’ll all be here to help out if something goes wrong.” 

With that she all but dropped you into your brother's arms, immediately unbuttoning your onesie and peeling back a thick medical bandage. You couldn’t lift your head enough to see your chest but judging by the amount of blood left on the bandage you could only assume your birth hadn’t gone smoothly. 

Rather than worry about your wound you instead chose to study your brothers face. It was uncanny how much your brother did resemble your father, it seemed the only feature he received from your mother were his eyebrows. Aside from that he was an exact replica of your father. 

This you found extremely charming, so much so that you put on your biggest smile and held your arms up to his face. He seemed genuinely surprised at your expression but smiled back and quickly held one of your tiny hands up to his cheek. As you both gazed at each other a flash was seen and a click was heard. With speed you hadn’t known he possessed your brother’s head turned towards your father, his expression the complete opposite of what it had been meer seconds ago. 

“Really dad? I bet you’re going to show everyone that photo now, how troublesome.”

Your father was holding a camera and grinning widely. Your mother was quietly laughing into her fist, her expression no longer borderline panicked but at ease. 

Something swelled within your chest, at first you worried that it was another medical emergency but you quickly realized it wasn’t. You were left speechless, your mouth was left open in utter bewilderment at this once nonexistent feeling filling your heart. Looking first at your mother, your father, and finally your brother you couldn’t help but feel affection towards them, you loved them. 

“Oi what’s with the face imouto? You know if you make faces then your face will freeze and you’ll have that look forever.”

Your brother quickly brought you back towards your parents, both of whom cooed at your adorable expression. 

“Well I’ll be taking my leave now. Should she or Yoshino need anything else please get a doctor or nurse but hopefully it won’t come to that. A nurse will be here shortly to attach a few leads to her, just to keep her breathing and heart rate tracked. Shikamaru, Shikaku, both of you have the rest of the week off. Get to know the newest addition to the family and say goodbye to peaceful, uninterrupted sleep. ” 

The blonde beauty had a teasing smile on her face as she looked towards your family. At her last line your brother and father both groaned, your mother broke out into boisterous laughter and you simply blinked. The day had been filled with new faces and restless sleep so to say you were exhausted was an understatement. 

As your new family continued to talk amongst each other your eyes slowly closed and you hoped with every ounce of your being that your sleep wouldn’t be plagued by attractive, insanely powerful Japanese men. 

***

The next few weeks passed by in a blur, most of your time awake was spent between your family and the blonde beauty. The pain in your chest would flare up almost every hour and it reached a point where you were taken into surgery. 

In your past life you had been blessed with perfect health - well perhaps “blessed” wasn’t the correct word for your condition, the Red Room had designed you to be the perfect spy after all. Falling asleep to an oxygen mask being placed on your body and waking up to an overall numbness in your chest was a foreign feeling though you quickly grew accustomed to it. It seemed almost every other day you would go into surgery only to come out and then be poked by numerous needles. 

The process became dull with time and you longed for the day you could get up and walk. Once you had enough strength to walk you could start your training regiment and figure out what caused you to be reborn. 

But for now all you could do was wait.


	2. 알고 보면 애기 (She's a Baby)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The life of a black widow in a baby's body.

Being a baby actually wasn’t all that bad. Sure having your diaper changed was a bit degrading but aside from that the lifestyle was very lax. This lax lifestyle led you to discovering something rather strange. There was a feeling that wouldn’t leave you body, you couldn’t control it and it was difficult to really feel at first but if you focused enough it was there. You didn’t know how to describe it but it felt almost sharp, like ice water or a very hot fire but wasn’t painful. After a few weeks of simply recognizing the feeling you started trying to track it. 

It took about a month and a half before you could easily track the flow of the feeling throughout your body. The sharp feeling would weave in and out of your limbs, to your abdomen, chest and head. Once you could pick a point of the feeling and follow it until it circled back to its original position you began trying to manipulate and redirect the feeling. If you felt it moving towards your hand you would try to stop it, or force more of the feeling to it. 

Doing this tired you quite quickly but you never stopped, Bruce and Tony would have never stopped toying with this new feeling, hell they probably would have figured out what it was by now. Using the two geniuses of your past life as motivation you spent every moment you were awake trying to decipher what that feeling was. 

That being said, you spent a large majority of your early months with your mother, meaning you got distracted sometimes. She would wrap you up tightly against her chest and show you off to many of her friends. Everyday you saw a new part of the city you were born in. The city’s buildings had a distinct traditional Japanese design to them. Tiled rooftops and multi-layered buildings sat in close proximity to one another, to the point where most buildings were sitting on top of one another or were completely joined. The city was built within a valley, the closest ridge had five faces carved into it, much like Mount Rushmore. 

Powerlines hung on hundreds of utility poles scattered throughout the city powering 80’s style televisions and kitchen appliances. It was jarring how in your past life your friends would have thrown a fit about the lack of modern technology while here it seemed almost like an afterthought. There were no motor vehicles either, shipments and travelers arrived in horse drawn carts and carriages while the military traveled on foot. 

_Tony would lose his shit if he was here, there’s only one local news channel on the television and I have not seen a cellphone or any type of internet here._

The last statement was true, you had yet to see an actual payphone or house phone or any type of cell phone in this city, whenever someone wished to communicate with someone they either had a letter delivered or visited them in person. And as far as you knew computers and the internet didn’t exist here, your father stored all of his important documents in file cabinets in his study and had never mentioned anything close to a computer when home from work. 

Despite the obvious technological setbacks you found that you rather liked your city. Children as young as two were allowed to play in the streets and explore with friends without parental supervision, men and women, young and old would walk the streets at anytime of day or night without the fear of being assaulted. It was peaceful. 

Your mother had gone back to work six months postpartum, leaving you to spend your days with many different people. On most days you went with your father to his office, you weren’t exactly sure but you figured he was a high ranking military official. Whenever someone would enter his office they would show nothing but respect, except for a select few. There were only a few individuals who would waltz into his office and act as though they were in their own home, your father never reprimanded them. 

Two in particular always made sure to spend the majority of their visits fawning over you. At seven months you had come to know Namiashi Raidō and Shiranui Genma very well. Their daily visits consisted of them annoying your father with late paperwork and then playing with you for hours on end. Every visit from them was welcomed by you because you received toys, food, and entertainment. 

Both men absolutely loved to spoil you and that had led you to become very fond of them. Raidō teased your father endlessly about how you loved him and Genma more than anything else and that usually resulted in very entertaining arguments. 

The other three men were Maito Gai, who was absolutely fabulous, Saurtobi Asuma, your brother’s sensei and Hatake Kakashi, a broken man who masked his loneliness with a nonchalant personality. While these three men didn’t visit your father’s office as often and Raidō and Genma did, they loved and cared for you all the same and you did as well. 

Gai loved to take you out on walks while your father read through his write up. He would take you to his favorite training grounds and shops, occasionally stopping to buy you toy weights or healthy snacks. 

Asuma would hand in his paperwork, lift you from your playpen and gossip with your father. You saw Asuma as much as you saw Genma and Raidō, he was your godfather after all. 

Kakashi would simply poof into your father’s office without paperwork, lift you into his arms and poof away. When you would regain your vision you would be in a completely different building or area of the city. Kakashi would find a place to sit and simply talk to you for hours on end. He told you everything from his early childhood, to his days in the war, to his sensei and two teammates, his current team and even about his father. The more he revealed about himself the closer he would hold you. He was seeking comfort and closure for things of the past, using you as a shrink rather than seeing a professional. When he would do this you did your best to show him you cared, that despite his own beliefs he was still a person worthy of love and happiness. 

You wanted him to know that despite his past, he was still capable of good things. Given your young age you couldn’t exactly voice what you wished to say but you tried your best to comfort him with close cuddles and uncoordinated sloppy cheek kisses. 

Kakashi’s trauma reminded you of Clint’s so much, both had lost absolutely everything they cared for in a short amount of time and now were simply trying to just survive. Clint had pulled you out of your darkest times and in turn you had pulled him out of his. You wouldn’t turn your back on Kakashi, not when you could hear Steve’s voice in your head telling you to do the right thing. 

Your father most likely knew that Kakashi was using you as a way to cope with his past but he never brought it up. Whenever Kakashi would bring you back to his office your father would simply remind him about the numerous reports he was neglecting. Kakashi would make a non committed noise and pat you on your head before poofing away. 

These five men had wormed their way into your life much like the Avengers had, they weren’t blood but they were family nonetheless. 

On days when your brother was not busy he would take you with him to train. With him were his two closest friends Ino and Choji, a loud blonde with striking teal eyes and a chubby brunette boy who always had a bag of chips. The three would take their time arriving at a designated training ground to meet with their sensei, who in their case was Asuma. 

While the three teens performed their hour warm-ups, Asuma would give you undivided attention. Sometimes he would play a more engaging form or peek-a-boo with you, other times he would bring you around the training grounds, pointing out all of the different flora and wildlife. Sometimes he would simply lay against a tree and cuddle you until you fall asleep. Though with every passing training session you learned that Asuma absolutely loved talking to you. It didn’t matter what the subject was, he loved having long, drawn out one sided conversations with you. Most of the time these conversations turned into lectures.

He would go into great detail about Konoha’s foundation and history with the other elemental nations, information you found very important. He also would speak about chakra, a form of energy that everyone has. 

“Chakra is the combination of two types of energy, spiritual energy and physical energy. It allows a human to perform extraordinary actions like - walking on water, anti-gravity motion, manipulate nature types and perform jutsu or ninja arts. But you don’t have to worry about that just yet Ayumi-chan.”

You only heard the first part of his rant and quickly pieced together that the feeling you had coursing inside of you was most likely chakra. 

_So if I have chakra and chakra is used to perform magic, I can basically become something equivalent or superior to Strange?_

Believing that to be true you spent the last few months honing in your skills. Over the course of the last 7 months you made many discoveries, some amazing and some not so amazing. The first discovery was that you had been born into a very influential and important clan. With this discovery came a very fond memory. 

***

You had only been about a month and a half old at the time- the majority of which you had spent in the hospital due to further complications with your surgeries- when you were brought home. You expected perhaps a small get together consisting of only close family and friends, what you got was a house filled to the brim with people and food. People of all shapes and sizes gathered around your father trying to get a better look at you in his arms.

“Yah! If I didn’t know better I’d arrest all of you for breaking and entering.” 

Your father scolded lightly though his smile conveyed his true feelings. In the last month you had learned that your father did not smile much for anyone who wasn’t his family, this made any smile he directed towards others all the more special. 

Two men who looked about the same age as father came forward and patted him on his shoulders. The first man you noticed was more heavy set than any other person you had seen while in this body, he also had light blue squiggly lines on both his round cheeks. You were wary of him at first though he immediately won over your heart when he gifted you with an eye smile. Oh you were a sucker for eye smiles. You quickly gifted him with a gummy smile of your own prompting an explosion of coos and squeals.

The second man had striking teal eyes and long dirty blonde hair. His face wore a teasing smile though it seemed more directed towards father than you. 

“Goddamn Shikaku, how the hell did your ugly mug make this beauty?”

Your father simply rolled his eyes at the blonde man but you were thoroughly insulted on his behalf. Your father was the most handsome man to ever exist and the only man who could compete with him was your older brother. Your displeasure must have shown on your face and your father used that to tease his friend. 

“You see because of that mean comment I’m letting Choza and his family hold her first.” 

Choza carefully held you in his arms and gave you another eye smile, you responded by holding your arms out to him and smiling back. While you would have never been caught dead doing this in your old line of work you found it increasingly difficult to stop now. While smiling at Choza you noticed two more people crowd you, a woman and a boy. 

_Ah they’re probably Choza’s family._

“Oh my look at how tiny she is, already a month and a half old but still looking like a newborn. Choji come look at your baby cousin!”

A round boy timidly came closer and you internally cooed at his cuteness, he, like Shikamaru, was an almost exact replica of his father. At his mother’s insistence and your family’s approval he held out his arms, waiting for his father to place you in them. You could feel his frame shake lightly, breaking into a cold sweat so you did the only thing you could do to try to calm him, you smiled. Doing that must have been the right thing because he smiled back, eyes shining with an emotion you couldn’t place. 

“Don’t hog all of her attention Choji! Let Ayumi-chan meet her future favorite cousin!”

At that you turned your head and saw a blonde girl standing directly in front of Choji, her brows were knit and her hands were on her hips. Choji started to protest but allowed you to be taken by the girl. What followed was best described as torture. The girl, Ino, bounced you around and walked in circles and talked too fast, so by the time you were passed to your paternal uncle your mood had soured a bit. This quickly changed when you met Nara Ensui.

Nara Ensui was your father’s younger brother, he wore dark green eyeliner and was much more dangerous than he let on. His first reaction to you being plopped in his arms was to ignore you, he held you in the crook of his left arm as he continued drinking with his right. To a certain extent you respected this, the man had his priorities straight. However you quickly got bored so you decided to fuck with him. 

His hair was in a low ponytail and strands had fallen within you reach so you grabbed a good chunk and pulled as hard as you could. Caught off guard, Ensui choked on his beer for about a full minute while the rest of the party watched in amusement. 

When he was done he looked down to you, amazed at the display of strength you had just showed. Slowly he brought his finger up to your small hands and in a hushed voice asked you to pull his finger as hard as you could. Deciding to please him you did just that and oh boy what a reaction you got. 

“What the fuck, Shikaku! What the fuck are you feeding my niece? Protein? Fucking steroids? She almost dislocated my fucking finger!”

Maybe it was the alcohol that was making him talk so passionately but you found his incredulous expression absolutely hilarious. Squealing in delight you cuddled the hand still in your grasp, completely unperturbed by everyone scolding his language. This seemed to have done Ensui in because he pulled you closer to his chest and started spewing nonsense about how you would become a powerful kunoichi, whatever the fuck that meant. 

Next you met Shikamaru’s teacher, Auma, and he was the exact definition of long, tan and handsome. He had been sitting out in the front yard with a couple more men, all of whom were wearing matching uniforms. Your brother was carrying you, his two friends Choji and Ino tagged along behind him, it seemed Asuma was a teacher to the three of them. When Shikamaru stopped walking you turned your head to take in the scene, there were five men there. 

They had obviously seen you and your brother approaching because their conversation ended quickly and their full attention was on you. One had shoulder length brown hair, the top was hidden underneath a bandana and in his mouth was a...senbon? 

_Why the fuck is this guy suckin on a senbon of all things?_

Next to the senbon sucker was a man who had a weal-like scar running across the left side of his face, his hair was brown and spiked. Both senbon sucker and scarface gave you and your brother gentle smiles, they didn’t make any outward attempts to hold you but that was totally fine with you, you liked the way your brother held you. Next you turned to a man who’s hair was in a bowl cut style, he also seemed to be wearing a bold, green spandex jumpsuit. Now this was new, no one you had met dressed like this man, and it seemed like he took pride in his unique choice of clothing. You couldn’t help but send a small smile his way.

Asuma came into view next, he was awkwardly holding a lit cigarette and avoiding eye contact with Shikamaru.

“I swear Asuma sensei if your bad habits give my sister an asthma attack I won’t stop dad and Ensui ojisan from beating your ass.” 

Asuma let out a long sigh and turned a lazy smile to my brother.

“Alright, alright I’ll stop smoking for now. Leave the princess here and get rid of this for me will ya Shikamaru?”

Your brother grumbled out a ‘troublesome’ but ultimately did remove you from your mess of blankets only to lay you on your stomach. Oh how you hated tummy time, it restricted your field of vision. Though you supposed that it wouldn’t be so bad since Shikamaru was there. That however changed with you heard him get up and leave, presumably to throw away his teacher’s cancer stick. 

Left alone with five men you didn’t know while in a very vulnerable position made you extremely nervous. You weakly moved your limbs in an attempt to get on your back, that way you could at least see more of what was happening around you. As you struggled you unconsciously let out cute little gurgles, this seemed to charm the men surrounding you. 

“Hah who would have thought old man Shikaku would pop out another kid. Think she’ll inherit his genius?” 

Senbon sucker was eyeing you with a curious glint, was your father some sort of renowned genius or successful scientist? You honestly would not have guessed that since most of the time he fumbled trying to change your diaper. 

“Probably, I mean look at Shikamaru. Kid’s not even 15 yet and he already made chunin, I’m willing to bet good money that this baby will be no different. I mean look at her, it’s like she knows what I’m saying or some shit, look at her scowl! Fuck if I was wary before I’m not now, she totally just gave me Yoshino’s signature scowl!”

Scarface was looking at you with a goofy smile despite your displeasure. You had no idea what ‘chunin’ meant but the way he said it sounded like a rank of some sort. If it was a rank then you were going to throw a fit, no way in hell were you gonna let your older brother be put in a ranking system. Just as your frustration peaked you felt large hands gently guide your body until you were laying on your back. You looked up and locked eyes with Asuma. This was your brother’s teacher and as uninterested as Shikamaru made himself out to be you knew he held him in high regard. So you graced said man with the biggest smile you could muster up after meeting so many people. 

“Wuah look at that, have you ever seen a Nara smile that big before? Asuma I think she’s thanking you for helping her on her back.” 

“You know if you actually paid attention to her body language then you would have noticed that she wasn’t particularly happy on her stomach, Raidō.”

_Ah so scarface's name is Raidō, good to know._

“Shut the fuck up Genma, it’s not like you helped her either.”

_Senbon sucker is Genma, cool beans._

“Ah how wonderful is this occasion! It is not often that we welcome children of our close friends into this world, let alone a second child! I can practically feel this girl’s power of youth developing!” 

You immediately turned your head to lock with the man who’s booming voice filled the entire front yard. He was holding his arms above his head and had on a blinding smile. The other men tensed and prepared themselves to comfort you, it wasn’t surprising why many infants didn’t get along with Gai. He simply was too loud sometimes.

“Dammit Gai do you want the poor kid to go deaf? Tone it down a bit, shit now we’re probably gonna have to deal with a crying baby. Who’s gonna tell Shikaku we didn’t mean to upset his infant daughter?”

Gai simply smiled widely down at you and you couldn’t help but mimic his energy. Opening your mouth into a gummy smile you let out a string of squeaks and squeals, making it very clear that your were delighted.

“Oh shit, she’s adorable. It’s bad enough she already has Shikaku wrapped around her chubby little finger but now I can feel myself giving in too. She’s too precious, she must be protected at all costs!”

_Hey maybe this Raidō dude isn’t so bad._

As the four men began discussing all the ways they would eventually give in and spoil you, your attention was drawn to the fifth man who had yet to speak. He had gravity defying silver hair, a headband covered his left eye completely and he wore a mask to cover the entire bottom portion of his face. As if sensing your stare his uncovered eye locked with your two obsidian ones. 

He hid it well but you could see some form of pain behind his eye and when he sent you an eye smile you knew whoever had hurt him, hurt him badly. For the first time in forever you felt yourself become thankful for all those years of psychological torment, familiarizing yourself with the pain you would eventually learn to inflict on others. 

You made a vague hand gestures toward the silver haired man, eyes wide and curious with a small smile usually resulted in you being carried by whomever it was directed to but not this time. The man simply smiled again and rested one of his gloved hands against the side of your face. 

Before you could nuzzle closer to the hand your body was being rolled over, you were being placed back on tummy time. Upset you let out a small whine and tried to roll onto your back again but a hand was firmly placed on you, limiting your movement. The four men stopped gushing about you when they heard you whine, Asuma being the one to ask the million dollar question. 

“Kakashi, why’d you move her back onto her stomach, she doesn’t like it.”

You could almost hear the eye smile in his reply.

“Mahh Asuma, tummy time is very important for a baby’s development.”

_So your name’s Kakashi, interesting._

Without even realizing it you fell asleep. You had met many people today and a well deserved nap was needed. 

***

Thinking back to such an important memory made you smile, it was difficult to believe that you had so many people who cared about you in your new life. You were so used to being left on your own, not knowing who you could trust or depend on. These short months had broken down those barriers you set up while training in the Red Room and Shield. 

***

Another discovery was made when you were only about four months old, and that was that you were very ill. You quickly realized that you had pretty severe asthma, it was triggered whenever you go really excited or very upset. For the most part your family had that under control, whenever your coughs would start to get wet they would bring you to the bathroom and allow the shower to steam up the air. It worked wonders every time but it left you flabbergasted at the idea of your family not owning a humidifier.

Believing to only have asthma you began to plan out your training regimen. You were already fluent in reading, writing, and speaking Japanese so all that was left was to relearn how to move around. If you could relearn to walk then you could start adjusting your body to be what it once was a lifetime ago. 

In order to achieve this you did as many leg and arm workouts you could do from within your crib. When you wake up in the morning you did four sets of leg lifts, each set containing ten lifts, and five sets of arm curls. When tummy time came around you would try as many times as you could to lift your body in a sorry excuse of a push up and everyday you got closer to the real thing.

When it actually happened you felt embarrassed at how winded you were, one of your arms had gone numb and a headache was quickly unfurling. Before you could gently lower yourself back onto your stomach you heard a gasp. Lifting your head you saw the shocked expressions both your mother and brother wore, your mother immediately yelling out. 

“Shikaku! Hurry! Come to the living room now!”

Loud thudding sounds came from father’s study, though footsteps weren’t heard. Despite this your father was in the room in half a second, in his hand was a kunai and his eyes spelled death for whoever they locked on. 

“Put your kunai away dummy and look at our daughter!”

Seeing your mother’s gleeful expression your father turned his eyes towards you ,taking in your planking form. Before you knew it, you were being lifted into his arms, cuddled and squished against his chest you weren’t aware of the prideful smiles your family wore. 

“My little Ayumi-chan is so strong, just like her mother. Only four months old and already able to hold her own weight. You’re growing up too fast, soon you’ll be walking and won’t be spending time with your old man.”

If your lightheadedness weren’t so severe you probably would have blushed at your father’s words. Just as you were about to smile pain jolted within your chest. You squeaked in surprise and hurt, something was swelling inside your chest to the point of bursting and the pain left you unable to make any noise. Amidst your panic you felt something release from your body, it almost felt like passing gas except this was flowing out of every inch of your body. Your family seemed to notice whatever was leaving you because they’re expressions morphed from happiness to shock again. Just as they began talking again you left all your senses shut down.

When you opened your eyes once again you were back in the hospital and a short haired woman was holding a glowing green palm over your chest. Your family was to your side and you were quickly deposited back into their arms. The woman assured your family that you were in alright condition to go home but to keep a close eye on you. Regardless you quickly decided that while you would still continue to push yourself to your limits you had to also be aware of the consequences it could bring. 

***

Pulling you out of your thoughts was a strong gust of wind. Startled you let out a yelp, wide eyes scanning the treeline behind you only to see Shikamaru and Asuma in the midst of a spar. 

“Hey watch where you aim your jutsu, you nearly hit Ayumi-chan!”

Ino was angrily scolding the two men as Choji picked you up and held you close. That was the neat aspect about chakra, if you trained enough you could convert your own chakra into elemental attacks. This was referred to as ninjutsu. You could also manipulate your chakra to enhance physical attacks, this was known as taijutsu. If you had spectacular control over your chakra then your could manipulate it into healing or creating illusions, these were medical ninjutsu and genjutsu respectively. Space and time could even be manipulated with chakra, it seemed that nothing in this world was impossible so long as you had chakra. 

“Mahh how troublesome. I was too focused on beating Asuma sensei I completely forgot I brought you along Ayumi-chan. That’s my bad.”

Deciding to play towards his guilt a bit you ignored his words and cuddled closer into Choji’s chest. If this went as you wished it would then by the end of this you would be eating BBQ and ice cream. In response to your cuddle, Choji began to lightly rub your back, sending a disapproving look towards his friend and sensei.

“Ah how about we call it a day, you’ve all worked hard and improved greatly so dinner’s on me tonight. Does BBQ sound alright with you three? Ayumi-chan will you forgive me and your brother if I buy you BBQ?”

He quickly plucked you out of Choji’s arms and held you close. You sent a smile towards your brother to show him you held nothing against him and he returned it with a gentle one of his own. 

As the five of you made your way to your favorite BBQ restaurant you found yourself getting sleepy, the gentle lull of Asuma’s steps spurred your release of melatonin. You tried to stay awake, speaking as much as you could but it was no use.

You had recently started having those strange dreams again, they never made much sense. They usually showed some sort of battle or atrocity which resulted in chaos. Just last night you had dreamed of a black haired boy getting crushed by a boulder, only to be saved and brainwashed by an old man with wild hair. 

Hoping your dreams wouldn’t be as sad as that again you fell asleep in your godfather’s hold. 

***

_The child had been obviously distraught but a commanding officer in Konoha’s military had given him the same task, and since the child served the military he could not refuse the order. The poor child had slaughtered the civilian and elderly while the masked man had dealt with the elite. The child cried and shook as he brought down his sword and ended his parent’s lives. Just when you believed the worst to have happened a door slid open revealing a younger child._

_“N-niisan, what are you doing!? W-why did y-you kill mother and father?!”_

_The poor child was scared and confused, the murderer, his brother was standing over their parent’s bodies. His face was hidden from the youngers vision but his words were clear._

_“I did it to test myself. There is no one in the Uchiha who can compare to me, not even you otouto.”_

_Suddenly the older brother was towering over his sibling, eyes glowing red like those of Madara._

_“If you wish to defeat me then you must learn to hate me Sasuke. Killing you now would be a waste of my time. Hate me Sasuke, kill your best friend and receive eyes like mine. Once you do so come find me and then I’ll make your death worth while.”_

_Before Sasuke could formulate an answer he collapsed. The older brother quickly turned away from his younger sibling has wiped away the tears that had gathered in his eyes. The masked man had returned, and addressed the mourning child._

_“Uchiha Itachi, you now will begin your life as a missing nin. Come with me and join my organization, I will give you a new purpose.”_

_The masked man’s voice was deep and it chillingly brought back memories of Madara’s voice. The chakra of the masked man was dense like Madara’s as well, whoever this man was, he was immensely powerful. Itachi tensed and again his eyes bled red as he gave his response._

_“I will follow you and join your organization but let me make myself clear. Under no circumstances will any harm come towards my brother. Should I be made aware that these terms have been violated I will not hesitate to kill you, Uchiha Madara.”_

_Oh. Well that couldn’t be right, Uchiha Madara was dead. You saw Hashirama kill him and mourn him. Even if he had somehow lived the chakra didn’t match. Whoever this man in the mask was it was obvious he was only an impersonator._

****

Before anything else could transpire you felt yourself be jolted awake. The dream had ended but felt incomplete, like you were missing some very vital information. It was dreams like those that made you feel so drained and despise sleeping. Once you could walk you would have to visit the library to confirm the events you were seeing. Perhaps you should talk to someone about your dreams, but that was a worry for another day. 

“Here you go Ayumi-chan, it has extra sauce just the way you like it.”

Looking up to the piece of meat Asuma was holding in front of your mouth you gladly opened and chewed. Your godfather had you balanced on his thigh while he tried to feed you and himself. In the process of eating a piece of meat he caught a glimpse of Kurenai passing by the restaurant. He was so distracted by her that he spilled sauce all over your face. The entire table had laughed and you happily licked a bit off before you were cleaned. 

“Ah sorry gaki, guess your godfather is a bit clumsy huh?” 

Your vocal cords weren’t used to saying too many words often so you still had a bit of trouble talking fluently. Regardless you smiled up at Asuma and answered him.

“It’s okay. It’s yummy!”

The older man simply chortled at your jolly response and the five of you continued to enjoy your meal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's chapter 2! I did a lot more editing and rewriting for the story so what you've read before may very well be completely changed. Tell me how you like this new story line!


	3. 싹 다 불태워라 (Burn it All)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More of life as the black widow inside of a toddler's body.

By the time you hit eleven months a lot of important milestones had been hit. You clearly remember how loud your mother had called for your father and brother and the camera when she walked into your nursery one morning and found you standing upright.

***

You were eight months old and had been holding onto the bars of your crib for dear life, not noticing when the door adjacent to you opened. You nearly jumped out of your skin at your mother’s loud shout but happily called out to her once you recognized that there was no threat. 

“Momma!”

“Oh my precious baby look at you! Oh you’re so strong and smart already aren’t you? Hold on for a bit longer sweet pea, Shikaku bring the goddamn camera quickly!”

Your father had not stopped bragging to his friends about your strength and Ensui demanded a copy of the photo taken. 

*** 

When you were nine months old you took your first few steps. You had been working on building up enough strength to walk for months and you were very close to simply giving up until that day. 

***

Your uncle and your father’s friends had been over for a few drinks and were now sitting around watching a shogi match between your brother and father. Your mother was at work and had left you in your father’s care. You were inside of your house while the rest of the men were outside on the patio. You had been happily munching on some cereal while watching the news when the television had lost signal. 

You waited for a bit, most of the time the signal would come back if you just waited. After about ten minutes you grew annoyed and called out to your father.

“Papa!”

No response so you tried again.

“Papaaa!”

Turning your attention away from the screen towards the patio you could see the group of men laughing and talking amongst each other. Their voices were far louder than yours so your father probably couldn’t even hear you. 

Letting out a huff of frustration you got on your hands and knees and began to crawl towards them. Embarrassment coursed through your body when you thought of Tony and how he would boast about his daughter inheriting his genius, he had been able to walk since he was seven months old and apparently so had his daughter. 

_Fuck this, if Tony can learn to walk at seven months I can do it at nine. I may not be a Stark but I’m a goddamn Nara._

Using a nearby chair as a crutch you pulled yourself onto your feet, wobbling and cursing under your breath at the effort it took. Shakily you brought one leg out in front of the other and repeated the process until you were able to keep your balance without the chair. 

The first few steps without the chair were difficult and uncoordinated, looking much like a drunk person’s. But as you drew closer to your destination you stance improved and you weren’t as winded as you would have expected yourself to be. You kept your eyes focused on the ground, you feared if you looked up you would lose your balance and fall. 

When you crossed the doorway and felt the chilly air hit your pajama clad body, you grew even more frustrated, your father was probably crushing your brother in the game and the other adults were dead silent all of a sudden. 

_Why couldn’t they have shut the fuck up when I was asking for the tv to be fixed. All I wanted was to watch some local news and eat my fucking ceareal but nooo, these boomers had to be loud as shit and force me to embarrass myself._

“Shikaku, look!” 

Raidō’s voice was a whisper but everyone heard him. Lifting your head from your feet you scowled at the dumbfounded expressions the men were wearing. Deciding to mess with them a bit you drew in a deep breath and then shrieked as loud as you could. 

“FIX GODDAMN TV!” 

The group of men all jumped at your shrill voice but made no move to get up. Getting more upset you wobbled your way to the shogi board and threw the pieces everywhere. Huffing in anger you whined when your brother brought you to his chest.

“Ayumi-chan… did you just walk?”

Wiggling in his hold until you were facing him, you crossed your arms over your chest and scowled deeper.

“TV broken.”

Choza was the first to burst out in laughter, though he was followed by Inoichi, Genma, Raidō and Asuma. Your father shook himself out of his shock and carried you back inside where he placed you on the tatami mat and moved to fix the signal for the television. You grumpily munched on your cereal as your uncle’s loud voice travelled into the living room from the patio. He was gushing over you.

“You see that shit Hatake? My niece is going to be the best kunoichi this clan has ever had. What other nine month old do you know can speak and walk as well as she can?! Absolutely no one! Not even your genius ass was walking at nine months.”

Your brother walked into the living room and sat right next to you. He was cooing and praising you and you couldn’t help but smile a little at his mushy actions. He was right in the middle of a rant to you when he stopped and his eyes blew wide open. 

“Dad, we didn’t take a picture of Ayumi-chan walking.”

Your father stilled and then shot upright and hurriedly made his way into the master bedroom to pull out the camera. The rest of the night was spent trying to get you to walk again, your mother would bestow her wrath upon everyone in the house for not memorializing such a moment. 

When she had walked into the house she had found this scene: Choza and Inoichi were on their stomachs flopping around like fish and making baby sounds, Raidō and Genma were in two corners and attempting to not piss themselves from laughing, Asuma, Kakashi and Ensui were dancing around the living room like crackheads and your father was on your left, begging you to get up and walk so Shikamaru could take the “goddamn shitty picture for your mother’s fucking scrapbook”. 

When your eyes met hers you let out a loud squeal that made the men freeze. Seven pairs of eyes turned towards your mother as you lifted yourself up and wibble wobbled towards her. Her face morphed from disgusted to shocked at the same time a flash went off. 

***

Thinking back to those two memories made your once cold heart warm. You loved your family, so much so that it scared you to think about the possibility of losing one of them. You couldn’t help the warm smile you sent your dozing father, he worked long hours and was only home one day out of the week. Those days he called daddy daughter bonding days, which consisted of waking up close to noon and eating ice cream from the freezer. Without fail, your father would take a nap from 3 to 5pm and during those two hours he was dead to the world.  
You gave yourself a few more minutes to marvel and appreciate your father, he really was such a softie when it came to you or Shikamaru.

When you finally heard his breathing deepen and even out, you stood and made your way towards his study. You see, about a week ago your brother’s team had received a D rank mission to help sort books at the library. When you heard that magical word you grew insistent that you go with him, going as far as to throw a tantrum when your father tried walking out the door with you.

While at the library you were placed in the children’s section and left to your own devices. This made your escape easy. You stood and walked right out of the children’s section and into the “Jounin” rank section of the library. Rows and rows of bookshelves welcomed you. All of these contained information that only people like Asuma could access per village safety. Reading through the first few confirmed some of the worst nightmares you had to be true. 

The only problem was that your dreams weren’t limited to events that had happened prior to your birth, you also dreamed of what you could only assume was the future and it completely terrified you. 

Konoha would get destroyed, worse than when Orochimaru invaded with Suna almost two years ago. The entire village would be turned into dust, your brother would break his leg and many shinobi would die. How could you simply sit around while it happened, you had firsthand knowledge of what was to come and you were going to use it. Which is why you now had a plan, and once said plan was set in motion all the dominos would fall in your favor. Everyone you had come to love would live long happy lives.

Quiet feet made their way towards the back of the traditional Japanese house, stopping in front of a thick wooden door. The door was closed with a chakra lock, only a very specific fluctuation of chakra would grant you access. It’s a good thing your father had indirectly shown you it first hand whenever he would carry you in here to grab a few things then leave. You focused on your chakra and slowly let it seep into the seals on the door, waiting for the exact moment to flex and bend it to fit the mechanism. Ten seconds later you were inside the study and carefully inspecting the scrolls and books within your reach. 

There were multiple scrolls on sealing which looks as though they hadn’t been touched in years, you grabbed them all and swiftly hid them under the floorboards in your room. A few traditional Nara clan scrolls which were squished in the very back corner of a cubby caught your attention as well so you quickly snatched those and hid them next to the sealing scrolls. The last bunch of scrolls you stole detailed advanced ninjutsu and kenjutsu techniques, something you’re certain you’re going to need when the time comes. 

As quietly as you could, you made your way towards the door but something caught your attention. An open file lay on your father's chair, bold letter detailing only one word: ROOT. You knew you only had a small amount of time before your father rose from the dead but the picture underneath the bold word made you freeze. Your entire body shivered as your gazed down at the picture underneath the word, an old man with bandages covering his right eye. You knew this man, he had ordered Uchiha Itachi to murder his entire clan but no one ever tied it back to him. 

_The geezer is supposed to be a counselor to the hokage, nobody knows the truth of the Uchiha Massacre, no one knows how he practically invited Orochimaru into the Leaf to assassinate the third hokage, no one-_

You quickly opened the file, you had to know the reason for your father to be investigating such a dangerous man. What you read was worse than you were prepared to deal with. Children, there were hundreds of missing children reported from all the major clans in Konoha. All except one, the Nara clan. You felt like being sick, this man was kidnapping children, most of whom were still prepubescent, and doing something to them. And if you were right then your clan would be next. Not wanting to upset yourself even more you closed the file and fled the room, stopping by your room to drop off the last few scrolls you had found interesting. 

Your father was still laying on the couch by the time you got back and you wanted nothing more than to have him hold you. You quickly ran towards your father and threw yourself onto his sleeping form. Fear filled your small body at the thought of being taken away from your family, at the thought of going through someone akin to the Red Room again. 

“Wha? Sweetheart what are you doing up from your nap? Why are you crying princess?”

You were more shaken by the file then you would have liked to admit, you didn’t want to leave your family and you certainly didn’t want anyone from your clan to be forced to leave theirs. Overall you just felt unbelievably sad. Kids were probably going through torture at the same time you’re cuddling your father and you couldn’t stop an insurmountable amount of guilt from swelling in your heart. It made you cry harder and cling to your father tighter.

Empathy wasn’t something you had in your old life and maybe that was for the best at the time. Now however, you understood why people said ‘I love you’, you had a family who supported you and cherished you regardless of your personality and you loved them right back.

In that moment, as you cried your frustrations out into your father chest you made your resolve. The plan would need to be edited quite a bit but the end result would stay the same, the only difference now was that you were gonna put a stop to Shimura Danzo and save those kids. 

***

February 15 marked your first birthday and you were salty. Both your brother and father were out of the village on missions, meaning you wouldn’t be celebrating your birthday until they came back. The only problem was that your brother and his team were on a long term mission, having left a little over a week ago and not expected to return for months. 

It was bullshit. But there was absolutely nothing you could do to change that, so you spent the majority of your days with Raidō and Genma. They would swipe you out of your mother’s arms before she went to work and would return you just as she made it home. They loved to show you off to other jounin and you loved the attention. They taught you how to correctly hold senbon and shuriken and kissed the small cuts you got as a result. They became your closest friends but even they had duties to tend to, meaning sometimes you were left with other teams.

Yuhi Kurenai was Asuma’s long time crush. Everyone in the village knew she also had a crush on Asuma except for the man in question. During his absence you had come to know her and her team very well. Watching the four of them train was astounding, Hinata was so quiet and shy but when fired up she was fierce. The Hyuga’s gentle fist was beautiful compared to the other taijutsu you had seen. Rather than relying on brute force and a massive build, the Hyuga made use of light touches and lean physiques. 

Inuzuka Kiba, on the other hand, was a huge damage dealer. He and his canine partner could rotate their bodies at high speeds and plow their way through almost anything. His personality was the complete opposite of Hinata’s, brash and arrogant but loyal to those who earned it. 

Aburame Shino was peculiar to say the least. His clan utilized insects to deal their damage. They had a symbiotic relationship with the insects, they lived within the body of the Aburame and fed off of their chakra and would give their lives to protect and fight for the user in return. 

Team 8 definitely was a team of unique fighters, and if you were being honest you were immensely jealous of them for it. Your fighting style was so generic and bland compared to the gentle fist or the rough Inuzuka style. You took notes every time you watched them train and would later attempt to mimic their movements. 

You were lucky that you were close to Gai, he was the best taijutsu user in your entire village and arguably the country. When you asked him for pointers and help training he had actually cried tears of joy as he ranted about your youthfulness.

The Red Room’s method of training was brutal but compared to Gai’s rigorous regimen, it was a walk in the park. Three days out of the week he would pick you up from your home at four in the morning for your early morning jog, which was actually a 10 mile sprint. Gai’s protēgē, Rock Lee, also accompanied you with your training, whenever you began to fall behind he would encourage you and push you to keep up. 

After your early morning run you would be subject to various different warm-ups. 100 pushups and sit ups, 100 yard hand walk, jumping rope until you reached 1000 and 200 squats. After that Gai would guide your tired body into the correct stance for throwing punches, blocking punches, kicking correctly and blocking kicks. 

After a month of this type of training you were bumped up to a more intense warm-up and were taught the basics to Konoha’s standard taijutsu and also Gai’s style of taijutsu. It was painful and many days you felt like dying but it worked. Once you knew enough of the general taijutsu you could mix in your Red Room style and make it your own. 

Aside from your growing knowledge of taijutsu your mother also began drilling etiquette and basic diplomacy into you. On days you spent with Raidō and Genma you would come home to a strict setting. Your mother made sure you understood why you needed to know politics and etiquette like the back of your hand.

“The Nara clan is a very influential clan in Konoha, Ayumi. As the daughter of the clan head you need to know what is expected of you. You will become a prominent political figure who will bring honor to our clan. In order to do that you need to be polite and respectful to absolutely everyone. You also need to be aware of the current political climate and have a firm stance in what’s best for the clan and village.”

_Ugh how patronizing. This is actually the plot to Mulan but okay mother, I shall bring honor to you and father and the clan. God Clint would never let me live this down if he ever found out._

Your mother was not fully aware of your lessons with Gai, she knew you loved the art of taijutsu and that you were learning a bit but you didn’t think she knew you were creating your own style. 

“Momma why does it matter if I know the current political climate? I’m not even two yet.”

At your question your mother’s face softened. 

“Ayumi-chan, you have been blessed with a great intellect. You can speak fluently way ahead of your time and you are capable of understanding most adult situations. Your path has always been to become a politician for the Nara clan and Konoha, you were going to learn all of this sooner or later. If you are capable of learning it now then why wait? The more familiar you are with these ideologies the faster your mind will adjust to think politically. And every woman must know perfect etiquette. You will never find a husband if you don’t. Doing these things will bring your father and your clan, honor. Is that not what you want?” 

_Oh you manipulative woman, you sneaky sneaky snake._

“I want to live a happy life momma.”

“Then you must learn this Ayumi-chan. Now back to the purpose of the daimyo…”

By this time it had been six months since you had last seen your brother and your godfather meaning they only had a little over a month before they were supposed to return. 

Like this you became well versed in local politics and various other villages politics. Every Sunday your father would sleep in and eat ice cream with you, quizzing you on different topics of political discussion. Monday, Wednesday and Friday became your training days with Lee and Gai. Raidō and Genma became your closest friends as you spent the majority of the week with them. And just like that the last month of waiting for your brother to return flew by until he was walking into the house. 

***

Since Shikamaru’s mission had run for almost eight months your mother decided to scrap celebrating your first birthday and simply throw a big bash for your second. You truly did not care about a big party but recognized that it was important for you, as the future clan diplomat, to have a healthy relationship with the other clans. 

_If you’re going to be clan head then you have to establish your presence, you’re a Nara so it’s expected that you’d be a genius. Control the situation and keep your audience engaged, don’t let their minds wander._

February 15th marked your 2nd birthday. Not only had your mother awoken you at the ass crack of dawn but she forced you into an uncomfortable, pale yellow yukata with matching geta. And if that wasn’t enough she spent hours straightening your usual mess of wavy hair and pulling it into a long slick ponytail. Light makeup sat on your adolescent face and you were reminded about everything that was expected of you. By the time you were finally deemed ready and presentable the party had already started. 

You were grumpy, hungry, and sleepy but still followed your mother’s request and smiled towards everyone present. Your many uncles let out whoops and cheers at your attire and you couldn’t help but laugh at it. Your house was filled to the brim with different clan heads and shinobi. Your father stood and took your small hand in his much larger one and introduced you to the various clan heads. You thanked your mother for her lessons on etiquette as you politely but confidently greeted them. Most were silent and respectful in return to your greeting except for one woman. Her hair was wild, her cheeks painted with red and her nails were sharp like claws. At her side was a massive wolf wearing an eyepatch. At your respectful bow and introduction she howled with laughter and ruffled your hair.

“Ah Shikaku, what the hell man!? Why does every clan raise their female pups to be weak and docile. Oi kid, don’t take any bullshit from anyone ever, women are just as strong as men if not stronger. If you ever want to learn how to not be a little pussy ass bitch then come find me in the Inuzuka compound!”

A few of the clan heads that were listening gasped and your father tensed. Before he could say anything though, you answered the woman.

“With all due respect Inuzuka-sama, I’m not weak. There’s a difference between being weak and docile and having respect for others. If you’re so insecure about your own political standing amongst the clan heads because of your gender then perhaps you should work on proving yourself with your actions and judgments, not berating the etiquette my mother has taught me.” 

A stunned silence filled the living room at your small speech until your father let out a loud sigh. 

“Ayumi-chan you can’t just say things like that. Apologize to Tsume-san.”

“No Shikaku, the pup has every right to voice her own opinions. Hell no one has had the gall to say shit like that to me in years. I like that kid, you don’t let anyone give you shit and I’m sorry for making you feel that way.”

“Regardless of your pardon Inuzuka-sama, I do apologize for my words. I am not ashamed about my upbringing and I do not have anything against your opinions on me. I do not take well to those who insult my family though. Despite that, I agree with your views on women, and I’m certain you have worked diligently to break any gender norms within the shinobi community and I hope more kunoichi will use you as a role model. I look up to you in that respect Inuzuka-sama.”

Said woman howled with laughter again and asked your mother to teach her son some manners like yours. You smiled lightly and continued to greet guests until your mother announced it was time to eat. Sitting between your father and brother you ate small portions of rice and karaage and sipped some green tea. 

Your uncle was already half a bottle into sake and was filling up a small cup before slamming it right in front of you. The loud noise caught the attention of everyone present and your uncle took full advantage of that.

“Alright Ayumi-chan, in order to be recognized as a real Nara you have to be able to handle your liquor. If you can’t even handle this small baby ass cup of sake then you can’t be a real Nara!”

Your father was pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance and your mother was mumbling profanities. You brother was simply watching the scene unfold. The rest of the party was watching with amusement written all over their faces, even the Hyuga looked intrigued. You looked at the cup in front of you and thought about the correct words to say.

“Ensui ojisan, surely you aren’t wasted enough to realize how wrong this is?”

“Mah Ayumi-chan, that just sounds like an excuse to not embarrass yourself in front of the most important people in the village.”

“Ah, that is not the case at all ojisan. I simply believed you were a man who tried to follow some sort of moral code.”

At your response a few of the jounin began to get more excited, your father was beaming with pride at your quick and witty response.

“Oi Shikaku, I didn’t know you raised a chicken. What a loser.”

“Alright Ensui ojisan, I’ll make you a deal. I will drink this sake and the rest of the sake in the bottle for a favor. I don’t know what the favor may be right now but I can cash in that favor whenever I wish and you must follow through with it.”

“HA! If you can do that then I’ll become your personal slave for a year!”

“Very well. Papa, Mama, you can blame my early start towards alcoholism on Ensui ojisan.”

Both parents began to protest but you were quick to take the cup and down the liquid. It had been so long since you had had any type of liquor and you couldn’t help but sigh in delight. The rest of the party went quiet, probably waiting for you to cough or back out of your wager. Lowering your cup you turned towards your father and politely addressed him. 

“Papa, please pass my Ensui ojisan’s sake. It seems he believes me to be, and if I may quote Inuzuka-sama’s words from earlier, a pussy ass bitch.”

Howling laughter and loud whooping broke out amongst the guests as your father hid his smile while passing the liquor. You made sure you filled your cup the perfect amount before downing it and repeating the process. As you poured more and more shots the guests got louder and even started placing bets. You finished off the rest of the sake, taking a total of six shots before turning to your uncle. His eyes were wide, mouth agape and face pale. You smiled sweetly at him before giving your final statement. 

“Momma ain’t raising no bitch, ojisan.”

Raidō, Genma and Inoichi all let out loud shouts of excitement at the same time as Asuma lifted you into a spin. You laughed and apologized for your crude language before settling back down at the table. Settling into your godfathers lap, the other clan heads were much more interested and engaged with you than before. Tsume had deemed you worthy to be an Inuzuka since you were “more bad-ass than any other Nara I’ve ever known”, Shibi simply congratulated you, Choza and Inoichi would not stop praising you and even Hisashi spoke to you without a tone of arrogance. 

You smiled and conversed back with them all until they seemed satisfied. By then the clan heirs had left the dining room to go gossip out in the backyard and you asked for permission to go as well. Your mother allowed you to as long as you changed out of your yukata and into your casuals. 

You gladly raced into your room and changed into a simple dark green long sleeve with your clan insignia on the back and some black leggings. Hastily slipping on your disgusting black sandals and running out the back door you made a straight beeline towards a certain chunin. When he was a clear shot away from you, you set off at a dead sprint before jumping into the air and shouting his name. 

“LEE-KUN!”

Said chunin turned towards your voice and smiled widely at you as he opened his arms. In the last year the bowl cut teen had become something akin to a sibling to you, like Yelena. He encouraged you to be the best you could be and was always willing to help you train. Even when he and Gai were out on missions, he would leave his book on training technique with you to help you in their absence. Landing in his arms had you laughing and smiling widely.

“Ayumi-chan! You’re challenge with your uncle was the most youthful. Though you must not fall prey to alcoholism, it would ruin all the work you’ve done this year. How about we have a race to celebrate your birthday? A forty five mile run, and the first one back doesn’t have to do crunches?”

At Lee’s loud outburst you laughed and others gasped. That was something you hadn’t told your brother yet, he simply assumed you went out with your father or Raidō and Genma.

“Oi Lee, put the poor girl down. I’m pretty sure she doesn’t want to go on a training spree with you.”

You turned your head towards the voice and landed on Tenten-san. She had on a face of exasperation, mimicked by Neji-san. 

“Actually Tenten-san, I love training with Lee-kun and Gai sensei in the morning. But you're right, that’s not what I want to do right now. How does a game of hide and seek in the dark sound?”

At your suggestion the majority of the teens perked up, and the ones not excited were quickly convinced to play by their teammates. Your brother had gone back inside to find flashlights for everyone while you braided Lee’s hair into a bun. 

“Lee-kun can I pluck your eyebrows sometime? I’ll pluck Gai sensei’s too if you say yes.”

“If you can somehow convince Gai sensei to allow his eyebrows to be plucked then I too will allow it!”

Lee plopped you back onto the ground when your brother returned with his arms full of flashlights. Once everyone had one Ino took control and went over the rules. 

“Okay, whoever is IT has to stay here and count to fifty, when they find someone then that person joins the IT team and helps search for others until only one person is left. The last person to be found is the winner. In order to find the last person you have to play a tweaked version of marco polo, the IT team shouts something and you have to shout back. Understood?”

“Is hiding in the forest allowed?”

“Yes, just keep in mind that there are deer wandering the forest. Try not to hurt them please.” 

At your brother’s words more of the group riled with excitement at the prospect of hiding in a dark forest. It was Kiba who groaned and complained about who would be IT first and as punishment was chosen to be IT. He cursed and boasted about finding everyone easily because of his enhanced senses but accepted the position nonetheless.

Once he had turned around and walked back into the house the group dashed for the forest. Your chakra control was superb, meaning you could easily climb up trees and jump from high branches. Your time spent at home had helped you find a small sinkhole on the far left of the forest. It was big enough to fit a platoon of shinobi but the entrance was small and hidden by densely packed bushes and grass. You immediately dashed for it once the group dispersed. 

It would take you a bit to reach but you knew the way by heart, which is what made tonight strange. You knew you should have reached your destination by now, you had been tree jumping for almost fifteen minutes but still you hadn’t reached the sinkhole. There was also something simmering in the air around you, it made the air thick and your movements sluggish. You stopped and reanalyzed your situation, looking around you definitely remembered passing by a certain grove of trees, you were running in circles. But that was impossible, how could you be running in circles when you were running in a straight line?

You wracked your mind for any possible answer to the problem but you were honestly stumped, until you smelled it. Smoke. Turning in circles you tried tracking the smell or finding the source. It seemed almost instantly you were circled by flames, they had appeared from nowhere, and no one seemed to be close to you so you had no idea where it came from. Panic coursed through your body but you force yourself to keep your calm. 

_Alright, something is definitely wrong here. I should have reached the sinkhole by now but something is messing with my mind. Then the fire, that came out of nowhere and it seemingly started from nothing. Ah shit this is a genjutsu isn’t it?_

Thinking quickly you tried to dispel the genjutsu with your own chakra but it wouldn’t budge, that meant you had to resort to harming yourself physically. Bringing your arm up to your mouth, you bit harshly into your forearm, wincing at the gush of metallic liquid filling your mouth. At that moment the fire began to melt away and the trees shifted, you weren’t near the sinkhole. In Fact you had long since past the sinkhole and were on the outskirts of the Nara forest. You could feel a group of people moving around you so you shined your flashlight around you. 

_Maybe Kiba is really good at genjutsu?_

“Kiba-kun? Is that you?” 

Silence answered your question but you still felt a group of people watching you. You stayed still and silent for a long while, willing yourself to not piss your pants from fear. 

Had you not been trained by Konoha’s marvelous green beast and the Red Room then you would have taken four shuriken to the legs. Using your rising adrenaline you made a mad dash towards the compound. Behind you leaves rustling and metal clanging together could be heard and you yelped when kunai started being thrown. The further you ran and the more projectiles you narrowly dodged the angrier the group following you got. 

“Owl, you better catch the girl before she makes it back to the group. Danzo-sama wants her. If you cannot catch her then make sure you kill her, she cannot know we were sent to retrieve her.”

_What. The. Fuck._

After hearing the baritone voice say those words you ran as fast as you could, ROOT was looking for you and they were willing to risk entering the Nara forest to get you. Your heart was pounding painfully in your chest and you felt your breath get shallower with every step you took. 

Two cloaked figures maneuvered their way in front of you and tried to catch you in ninja wire, you barely managed to escape but not without the wires slicing into your arms and legs. You were bleeding steadily and you were slowing down, you had to think of some sort of plan before the blood loss becomes an issue.

You ducked under some brush and crawled into a heavily obstructed path. Once there you spread your chakra as far as you could, hoping to find a familiar chakra signature. One of your chasers let out a predatory growl and flared his chakra violently.

In that instant you felt all the air leaving your lungs, this man was looking to kill and it was clear that his target was you. As scared as you were you felt a small flush of relief, that man’s uncontrollable rage had sealed their fates. Their position and presence were now disclosed to any trained shinobi within a ten mile radius. In response to the large amount of killing intent let out, you released your own chakra in code. It was a simple code that Gai had taught you in case something ever went wrong. 

The rest of the group reprimanded the man but the deed had been done, already you could feel the familiar chakra of your father, uncle and godfather racing towards your position from the east and the group of chunin’s chakra from the north. You smiled a strained smile at your chasers.

“Oh you’re fucked now, if you can’t even catch me then there’s no way you can outrun my family and friends.”

You were so caught up in your small victory that you failed to notice a cloaked figure circle around your back side until a strong kick was delivered to your head. Landing on the ground with a dull thud, you willed your eyes to remain open. Black spots littered your vision and when you moved a violent need to vomit almost consumed you.

_That’s a pretty severe concussion, I’m surprised that didn’t cause my head to explode considering the amount of chakra in that kick._

You barely had enough time to roll out of the way of a kunai, it became embedded into the meat of your thigh but that was better than your chest. Screaming loudly you gathered as much chakra as you could into your fist and punched the individual. His body gave a sick crunch as it became embedded into a nearby tree. Leaving the kunai in your thigh you quickly staggered away from the other’s reach. 

_That’s good, compartmentalize the pain, focus solely on making it to safety. I can’t die yet, I have to stop Nagato and the Akatsuki and learn to open the eight gates and see my brother embarrass himself in front of Temari._

You were tiring quickly and your head injury made everything in your sight blurry but you continued to run. You could still hear the ROOT agents trailing you and even circling you but they no longer made any moves to capture you. 

You let out a choked sob when you distantly heard your father calling out your name, screaming out a response you failed to notice the small pieces of paper scattered around your area. As your family came into sight, a ROOT agent fell to your right. You stiffened and attempted to run but he grabbed onto your neck and lifted you from the ground.

“Nara Ayumi, you have been given a gift you do not deserve. Many people will come for you, only ROOT can keep you safe.” 

Your mind was reeling, unable to focus on anything. 

_A gift? Does he mean my visions or whatever the fuck I see?_

Your family was only a few hundred meters away, close enough to see everything that was happening but far enough to not be hurt by it. Before you could question what the agent meant he formed the “snake” hand seal. 

Your eyes widened and you choked out a scream as the agents body exploded into a warm, wet mess. You were caught between screaming in utter shock and disgust and pain as the heat and fire rolled off of the agent’s body and burned you. Before you could move away from the area more explosions went off. One from right behind you and another from underneath you, these sent you flying through the air and shrieking in pain. Your chakra rushed towards the surface of your skin in a sorry attempt to shield your skin from the overwhelming heat. To you it seemed like the entire forest was in flames, you no longer could see much of anything other than red and orange flames. Your body was burning and you panicked. 

Thinking quickly you punched the now loose soil underneath you to create a cater. Curling into the cater you shut your eyes and allowed the blasts to cover you with debris, it was better than staying out in the open and burning. You did not account for was a gargantuan pine tree to fall over your shelter, pinning your small body. The last sound you heard before your world turned bright red was your uncle and father shouting your name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We in this boys, currently rewriting chapter 5!


	4. 가시처럼 돋아나는 Pain (Pain Pprouting Like a Thorn)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That night from Shikaku's perspective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have not seen Avenger's Age of Ultron then dream sequence might not make too much sense. Sorry about that.

When his son informed him that the teens and his daughter were going to play hide and seek in the dark Shikaku couldn’t help but smile. He clearly remembers Shikamaru and his pack of friends playing that same game in their childhood, and now they were playing again to please Ayumi. 

Thinking of his youngest, Shikaku couldn’t stop a fond smile from spreading across his face. Ayumi was so special, not just because she was his daughter but because she was so incredibly bright, even by clan standards.

At two years old Ayumi could already formulate and maintain complex conversations with other adults, she picked up on various political ideologies with ease, she analyzed any given situation and then formulated an opinion as if it was second nature to her. Shikaku already knew that his daughter would become a very successful political figure that would bring prestige to the Nara clan. And yet despite this, he couldn’t help but feel intense sadness for his daughter. 

Nara Ayumi had been born with congestive heart failure and asthma. This had made the first few weeks of her existence very difficult, Tsunade-sama had warned them that, with how severe her condition was, it was very likely Ayumi would die. Such news had hit the family hard, having already held the small girl they wanted nothing more than to take her home and give her the best life.

Shikaku treated every moment he spent with his daughter while in the hospital as if it were his last because it damn well could have been. No one knew when her body would simply give out after so many invasive surgeries, and she was so small, so so small. Shikaku could comfortably hold his newborn daughter in one hand and that scared him.

When Shikamaru had been born, he had weighed almost double the weight of his daughter and was almost three inches longer. Back then Shikaku hadn’t thought someone could be so small and yet his daughter had proved him wrong. 

When Tsunade-sama had cleared Ayumi to be brought back home, Shikaku wanted to drop to his knees and thank the heavens. Whenever his baby seemed to be getting better her health would deteriorate to the point of requiring surgery, so hearing the best doctor around assure him that she was healthy enough to take home lifted a giant weight off of his chest. 

Seeing his friends and family accept and love his daughter had filled his tired body with warmth. As the months flew by, Shikaku was left flabbergasted by the sheer amount of love everyone seemed to have towards his daughter. 

Choza and Inoichi loved spoiling their newest niece, Asuma treated his goddaughter like she was his own, and Gai always loved children so it wasn’t a surprise when he took an immediate liking to her but it was shocking to see her like him back. Usually children found Gai too intense but not his daughter apparently. Genma and Raidō had taken in little Ayumi as their younger sister and spoiled her with numerous gifts and treats, and even Kakashi became attached and loved Shikaku’s small child.

Shikaku’s own brother, Nara Ensui, was convinced that his niece was destined to be someone great. Despite being a seasoned shinobi and captain in anbu, Ensui loved to gush about Ayumi’s growth and strength and perceptiveness. All to often, Shikaku would stumble onto his brother bragging about the bright future his niece would have as a kunoichi and that’s what made his heart hurt. 

When his little shadow was only four months old, her body had gone into cardiac arrest. At the same time his baby had lost consciousness, she released a massive amount of pure chakra. The sheer amount she was releasing was equal to that of a trained chunin and he had never felt more prideful and fearful. His wife hadn’t known what caused it and it wasn’t until they were at the hospital that Shizune-san informed them that Ayumi’s heart and lungs did not have the capability to withstand the gargantuan amount of chakra she had. 

In order to keep her healthy enough to live a normal life, Jiraiya-sama and Tsunade-sama had to place a seal on Ayumi. The chakra suppression seal was placed on the back of her neck, hidden from the girl but easily accessible to everyone else. The seal suppressed around 70 percent of his daughters existing chakra and limited the amount her body could naturally produce to almost nothing. 

Even with the seal his daughter had reserves bigger than most of the Nara clansmen outside of the head family, meaning that her body would be in a constant state of chakra exhaustion. Any sort of physical activity would wear her out faster than what was considered “normal” and any activity involving chakra could either drain her reserves to dangerous levels or overwhelm her heart. Both options had a big chance of resulting in her death and that wasn’t something Shikaku was willing to risk. 

After that incident, Shikaku and Yoshino sat together and discussed what they could do for their girl. Shikaku never believed in controlling his children’s lives and decisions, he believed a parent should be someone who could offer advice and new perspectives to their kids but ultimately allow them to live their lives how they wished. He never understood the way of the Hyuga and Uchiha, how from the tender age of three, a child’s life would already be planned. He saw both Hyuga Hiashi and Uchiha Fugaku as fools, failures as parents, because instead of nurshing their children to be confident and happy they bullied them into being insecure.

Shikaku never approved of their parenting and when Shikamaru was born he swore he would allow his son the freedom to dictate his own path in life. And that had worked wonders for his son, he was the only genin to be promoted to chunin during his first chunin exams and his track record for missions was close to perfect. His son was content with his life and he trusted his father to always have his back and that’s all Shikaku could have ever hoped for. So when he found out he was going to be a parent to a baby girl he swore he would give her the same respect and support he gave his son. 

Except, now he couldn’t. He couldn’t because it put his daughter’s life at risk. If he allowed Ayumi to choose her own path in life and she chose to become a shinobi then odds were she would die of heart failure before her graduation from the academy. So he did what he disproved of Hiashi for doing and planned the life his daughter would lead. She would become a politician, well versed in not only Konoha’s politics but in the entire elemental nations’. She would live a safe life away from any blood and violence and then the clan elders would pick a suiter for her to marry. 

But of course, his daughter did not fall under the rubric of a “sickly” child, much less a Nara. 

Shikaku and Shikamaru had been away from Konoha when Ayumi’s first birthday came around, he had taken a short time out of the mission to pray for his daughter’s health and quickly buy her a new coloring set but ultimately didn’t think much of it. When he finally returned to his home at around four in the morning two months later, he was shocked to see his daughter already up and about. 

She was dressed in a loose, long sleeve jumpsuit that reached the middle of her calves and had her hair in a tight ponytail at the top of her head. She had joyously greeted him and asked him about his mission but Shikaku could only muster up a few words before asking the obvious question.

“My little shadow, why are you up at such an hour?”

His darling daughter had simply smiled widely at him as she fastened her sandals on her small feet.

“I’m training papa! Gai sensei and Lee-kun have been training me in taijutsu. They come pick me up around four so we can get a few laps in before the sun rises.”

That was not the response Shikaku had been expecting but to be fair he wasn’t sure what he was expecting either. He simply stared at his daughter, his perfect, and completely unNara-like daughter. He did not know of any Nara who would willingly wake up at such hours to train, much less with someone as intense as Gai. 

His shock stopped him from asking any other follow up question before the two shinobi appeared on his front lawn. Shikaku stared at his daughter as she all but flung herself at the jounin, speaking animatedly about her progress in her endurance. She hadn’t even said goodbye to him before disappearing with the two shinobi.

Later, Shikaku would come to find out that she dedicated a large portion of her week to studying and familiarizing herself with the ways of diplomacy at both local and global levels and learning proper etiquette for a lady. The few days she wasn't nose deep in books and scrolls or getting lectured by Yoshino, she spent training. Whether that meant actually training with Gai and Lee or observing and taking thorough notes on different fighting style, his daughter fully dedicated herself to becoming stronger. 

It broke his heart to know his daughter was so determined to become stronger because he knew it wasn’t going to lead her anywhere. Both he and Yoshino agreed to not disclose their choice to dictate their daughter’s life for as long as they could, not even Shikamaru knew about their decision. 

Hearing his brother gloat about the genius little Ayumi was and how she would only become stronger, killed Shikaku. Seeing her eyes shimmer when witnessing ninjutsu being performed made him want to reconsider his decision but he couldn’t. He would do anything to keep his daughter alive and safe, even at the expense of her own freedom. 

When Kiba entered the house and told the adults that he was going to be IT first, Shikaku smiled. He was glad to know that his youngest could still play and have fun like a normal child. Ten minutes later he tensed, Ensui did as well. There was an abnormal chakra within the forest, it didn’t feel threatening but it still put him on high alert. 

“Oi Shikaku, do you feel that shit? It’s coming from far west within the forest and I don’t recognize it.”

Now that frightened Shikaku. Ensui was an anbu captain, it was his job to be at least familiar with the majority of chakra signatures within the village in order to keep it safe from outsiders. Hearing that he didn’t recognize that chakra signature within the forest raised countless red flags for Shikaku, mostly centered around the fact that his kids and his friends kids were playing there. Standing abruptly, Shikaku motioned for the party to follow him outside.

“There’s at least one foriegn chakra within the forest. Hiashi-san, could you please use your byakugan to locate our kids?”

As the clan head obliged, Korumaru and Tsume both snarled. 

“There’s at least six other people within that forest besides our kids.”

“Tsume-san is correct. The majority of our children are already together further north in the forest. Those six individuals seem to be surrounding your daughter Shikaku...she’s running and they’re chasing!” 

Every hair on Shikaku’s body stood straight at Hiashi’s exclamation, his blood ran cold for a brief second before it boiled with indignation. 

“Hiashi, Tsume, Shibi, will you please help me track them?”

With the three older shinobi agreeing to track, Shikaku instructed his wife and two teammates to stay behind in case the pursuers circled back. Kakashi had already summoned his pack to help track, he, Asuma, Raidō, and Genma would try to come from behind while Shikaku, Ensui, Gai, and the three trackers came from the front. 

“Shikaku we must hurry, they’ve begun actively attacking her and we are too far away to be of help if she gets wounded.”

Hearing that spurred the pack of seasoned shinobi into the forest, they had a lot of ground to cover if they wished to reach the girl in time. For the first few minutes nobody spoke, Ensui and Shikaku were already on edge and ready to tear into whoever was threatening the youngest Nara. They only stopped when Tsume and Kuromaru informed them that they smelled fresh blood. 

“Yeah this is definitely the pups, it reeks of fear and adrenaline. Whatever they got her with, they got her good. Be prepared for on site first aid.”

Shikaku had to physically restrain Ensui from dashing off on his own, as much as he wanted to simply kill whoever was the threat, he had a duty to collect information about the intruder first. Before they could set off again, a massive wave of killing intent flooded the forest, it was so thick and vile that Shikaku almost missed the desperate flares of chakra from his daughter. She was flaring her chakra in code, meant to only be used in dire situations. 

“That’s Ayumi-chan, I taught her to flare her chakra in that code should she ever be in danger.”

Shikaku had never heard Gai so serious, he usually kept his cheerful tone regardless of the situation but apparently not today. He didn’t have much time to dwell on that thought though because instantly the group was off again. 

As they drew closer to the source of foreign chakra they heard a loud scream, one Shikaku had hoped he would have never had to hear. Flaring his own chakra, Shikaku ran until he could barely make out his daughters staggering figure within a clearing.

“AYUMI!”

Said child turned her head at the shout of her name and let out a gut wrenching sob.

“Papa!”

Before she could stagger closer to the pack of adults, a cloaked figure dropped down right next to her and lifted her off the ground by her neck. Shikaku watched as his toddler flailed helplessly, only stopping once she was face to face with the attacker. 

He was too far to make out what they were saying, he hoped Tsume and Kuromaru could fill him in later, but still he ran. He ran like he had never run before. To his left Ensui looked rabid, his eyes were locked onto the figure holding Ayumi, to his right Gai looked only slightly annoyed, it had taken years of a friendship to know when Gai was truly angered so Shikaku knew that at this very moment, if Gai got a hold of the attacker then they would die a painful death. 

He was so close to his baby, only a few hundred meters away, if he could just make it and save her then that would suffice. Instead he watched as the attacker brought his free hand up to his hidden face and formed the hand sign for ‘release’. 

The first tag to explode was the one attached to the attacker, blowing up his body into nothing but guts and blood and flinging the small body of his daughter into the next explosion. Shikaku was not conscious of the agonized shout he released. He did not feel when Ensui held him back from the flames, nor when he fell to his knees. He simply watched in complete horror as his daughter was lost within the chaos unfolding in front of him, her shrill screams at least reassuring him that she was still alive. 

When those screams finally stopped Shikaku felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest, like he was back in the hospital waiting to find out if his newborn daughter had lived to meet him. 

He wasn’t aware of Shibi and Hiashi parting with the group to try and track the rest of the attackers, he didn’t hear his own son arriving at the scene and asking him what had happened and he sure as hell didn’t feel himself start to cry until his pants began to dampen from his tears. 

Even when the last explosion ended Shikaku made no effort to move. He was afraid of what he might fight within the wreckage. If it hadn't been for his son and his brother then Shikaku probably would have stayed glued to his spot, not wanting to find what remained of his once lively and perfect daughter. 

Slowly he rose to his feet and took a shaky step into the wreckage. Fire and burning wood covered the majority of the scene. Shikaku let out a shaky breath as a large water dragon doused the clearing, effectively putting out the majority of the fire. Kakashi and his pack, along with the rest of the jounin stood on the other side of the clearing, judging by their shocked faces they most likely saw some of what had transpired. 

“Look beneath the wreckage, she was standing on ground zero when the explosions went off.”

Ensui’s voice rang out loud and clear to all within the forest. The chunin who weren’t clued into what had happened quickly pieced together the story with that simple command. 

“Is she- can anyone sense her chakra?”

“Yes! I found her, she’s underneath the massive pine. Her chakra is very weak though.”

At Neji’s answer the group rushed towards the pine and began attempting to move it. It was large and heavy, the sheer weight made it almost impossible to move. Just as the group was beginning to make progress Hinata let out a loud shout.

“Stop, stop! I think she may be pinned beneath the tree. If you move the tree the wrong way then it could cause more damage or increase blood loss. Neji-nissan, help me guide the group into remove the tree without hurting Ayumi-chan.”

By the time the tree was moved enough to reach Ayumi, help had arrived. Tsunade-sama and Shizune were on the scene as well as Ibiki. They were taking in what little information was available and trying to find anything identifiable left behind by the attackers. When the tree had been moved Tsunade and Shizune had rushed into action to treat the girl as best as they could, to stabilize her before taking her to the hospital. 

“Okay Shizune, slowly turn her body towards me and then we’ll lift together.”

Shikaku watched with hopeful eyes as the two women tried to securely lift his daughter out of the small crater she was in. Those that hope quickly vanished when their voices raised several octaves.

“Shit. Okay we have ruptured intestines permeating through a large gash in the abdomen. Bring me my trauma kit now! If I don’t put them back in their place, then we can’t move this patient to the hospital. Hurry! Shizune, on the count of three we are going to lift the girl onto the ground right in front of me so I can work. One, two, three!”

When his daughter’s body was lifted, Shikaku wanted to vomit. She was covered from head to toe in blood, her arms and legs were sliced through in various places and her intestines were literally spilling out of her body. 

He was both terrified and relieved when she opened her eyes and coughed. The two medics took that as a good sign and continued working on the girl. 

“Someone keep this girl awake. Tsume, bring your partner over here and mystify the girl with a talking dog. Shikaku come over here and try to keep her awake. Somebody do something!”

Both he and Kuromaru rushed forward and fell into Ayumi’s field of vision. She first spoke to Shikaku.

“Papa.. hurts..”

“I know sweetheart but I need you to stay as still as you can okay? Just squeeze my hand whenever you feel the pain okay?”

His daughter was staring at him with unfocused eyes but still managed to squeeze his hand weakly. Her gaze then turned to Kuromaru and her eyes widened.

“Doggy..”

“I’m a ninken, not a doggy.”

“...you just talked.”

“Does that mystify you child?”

“Not really, I once was very well acquainted with a raccoon who could talk and build stuff.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah...his name was Rocket..he took care of the universe with his friends.”

“Oh really? Tell me their names.”

“Think they were called the Galaxy Guardians or Guardians of the Galaxy… he always talked about someone named Groot, said he was his best friend.”

“That’s quite a tale.”

“It’s true. I remember all of it. I remember...I died.”

At that statement Shikaku turned a concerned eye towards Tsunade, who was also listening to the girl ramble about her friend raccoon. Before he could ask his daughter to elaborate on her last statement, Tsunade deemed her stable enough to transport to the hospital. 

Kissing his daughters head before she was carried out, Shikaku stood and watched her leave. Turning his back once she was out of sight, his face morphed from concern to unmitigated anger. Looking at his loyal circle of friends he managed to voice a few sentences in his fury.

“We find the sons of bitches who did this. We destroy their minds to find a motive and then we kill them. You all with me?”

The group nodded, equally as angered before they began discussing plans.

***

_Laura Barton was a beautiful woman. She had married your best friend before he had joined shield. Watching her hug her husband filled you with a small tinge of jealousy. Watching her young daughter, Lila, run up and hug Clint increased that jealousy._

_“Did you bring Auntie Nat?”_

_Hearing her ask that made you smirk._

_“Why don't you hug her and find out?”_

_Lila rushes towards you and you’re more than happy to pick her up._

_Steve was bashfully rubbing the back of his head as he entered the cozy home. Briefly his eyes met yours as a light blush colored his cheeks._

_“Sorry for barging in on you like this.”_

_“Yeah, we would have called ahead, but we were busy having no idea that you existed.”_

_Ah Tony always was ready with a quick follow up to everything Steve said. It was also perfectly timed and often got him reprimanded but that’s what made him and Steve best friends and co-leaders of the Avengers._

_“Yeah, well Fury helped me set this up when I joined. He kept it off SHIELD's files, I'd like to keep it that way. I figure it's a good place to lay low.”  
Clint was too good to you all. He had risked exposing his family to outside threats in order to keep you all safe. His wife was heavily pregnant, and already she had given him 2 beautiful daughters who you called your nieces. _

_Walking up to Laura you lay your hand on her protruding stomach._

_“How's little Natasha, huh?”_

_“She's... Nathaniel.”_

_Shock and joy filled your body. You wanted to cry because as much as you would love your nephew you had hoped for a mini you. Moving your face closer to Laura you lowered your voice so only the kids could hear you._

_“Traitor.”_  
***

You were flying. Everything was dark and stuffy but you were flying. Chilly air was penetrating the flimsy hospital gown you were wearing and it made you shiver slightly. It was only then that you realized you were being carried, the arms tightly holding you were careful not to jostle your body too much. 

Maybe it was the grogginess of just barely waking up, or maybe it was the pain medication making you slow but you felt no fear or confusion by your situation. Instead you snuggled closer to whoever was carrying you and closed your eyes again. Before sleep overtook you for a second time you were whoever held you chuckle, a deep and sadistic chuckle. 

***

When you regained consciousness you were concerned. Your abdomen felt horrible and your head was pounding, which wasn’t supposed to be happening if you were at a hospital and heavily medicated. Your entire body was freezing and you quickly realized you weren’t lying on a bed. 

Blinking away your grogginess and compartmentalizing the pain to deal with later, you took in your surroundings. 

_Okay, this is eerily similar to the HYDRA base Barnes was held in. Thick steel walls, no windows, only one door, creepy machines in the corner, the air is cold and humid so that probably means I’m somewhere underground. This is fine, this isn’t HYDRA, they can’t make me into a winter soldier, I just need to play along. Survive, I just need to survive._

As you steeled your resolve another chill ran up your spine. Lifting your head as far as you could you tensed as you realized you were in fact strapped to a metal table and completely naked. There was an angry red gash across your abdomen which was barely being held together by a few stitches and your arms and legs weren’t dressed with bandages. 

_So they’ve undressed my wounds as a scare tactic, smart. If I try to make any large movements then my stitches won’t hold._

You waited patiently for someone to come, you had a very strong suspicion that all of this was ROOT’s doing but you supposed an outside group could have done this as well. You weren’t sure how long you waited but before you could fall back asleep the heavy door opened and in walked four figures. Two were cloaked in black and one was cloaked in red. They kept their heads bowed at an angle, and they walked three steps behind the one in the middle but their muscles were ready to jump out and defend. They respected the older individual. 

Staring at your naked form was Shimura Danzo. His face was blank and his eyes stayed unwavering on yours. 

“Nara Ayumi, do you know where we are?”

You didn’t answer, you made sure to keep your face void of emotion since he most likely would be waiting for a reaction.

“Are you mute child? I asked you a question.”

Again you didn’t answer him. Instead your eyes moved from the old man to his two friends. As the silence carried on one of the two became more tense, he began flexing his fingers and his weight shifted from one foot to the other. 

“Very well, keep your silence child. My name is Shirmura Danzo and I’m going to make you into the perfect soldier.”

_Now that sounds like something HYDRA would say when making winter soldiers._

Danzo stalked closer and you grew more uneasy. Slowly his hand come closer to you until it was gently resting on your bare chest. Your heart was beating wildly because despite being trained by the Red Room for potential non-con with your mark, it still left you feeling sick. Especially now, in the body of a prepubescent child, there would be no way of hiding what would transpire within the next few minutes. 

You let out a shaky breath and squeezed your eyes shut, mentally preparing yourself for what was to come.

Except it never came.

Opening your eyes, you saw and heard Danzo sigh and lifted his hand. 

“Oh child, I may be regarded as a monster but I would never hurt you that way.”

His voice was so soft, it reminded you of a grandfather talking to his grandchildren. At his words your naive heart and body began to calm, just as he wanted. Then, in one swift movement too fast for your eyes to track, Danzo brought his hand down onto your chest with so much force your ribs cracked and broke. 

You were left weezing as Danzo smiled sweetly at your pained expression. Sucking in as much air as you could, you turned and spoke.

“W-why?” 

“Because of your gift Ayumi. I’ve been waiting for you to arrive since the downfall of the Uchiha.”

“Wh-at?”

“Hmm I suppose I should explain before we begin the procedure. A long time ago, when the age of shinobi was still new and blossoming, a baby was born with a special ability. He would go to sleep and dream vivid dreams of the people around him. As he grew older he realized that his dreams weren’t dreams but rather a glimpse into the future. But he was too late, his had foreseen his village burning and his wife dying in front of him and simply denied the possibility of it occurring. When the events transpired he was so overcome with grief that he killed himself as punishment. Every one hundred years a child would be born with this gift. The last one to possess it was Uchiha Izuna, younger brother to Uchiha Madara. Uchiha Izuna developed his ability so well that it manifested itself as arguably the most powerful dojutsu, the rinnegan. With his rinnegan, Izuna is said to have been able to manipulate time itself, he could stop or fast forward time. Though, when he did this, he would grow very weak. That is how he died, overuse made him weak and Senju Tobirama used that to his advantage. When Izuna died, the elemental nations believed that they simply would have to wait for the next gifted but that was not the case. Izuna had used his rinnegan to look into the future, he documented that the next person to be gifted with his eyes would be a girl born into the head family of the Nara clan with poor health.”

His rant was long and he would stop for a prolonged period of time but you listened. You listened because he was speaking about your visions, he was claiming that there were others like you before and that you had always been meant to be born. Which didn’t make sense, how were they supposed to know you had died in your last life? What if it had been Clint? 

“Wh-at do you w-ant with me?”

“The Uchiha had a plan for you, they wanted to use you as a weapon against the village. Luckily I had them taken care of before you were born. Your gift, if it falls into the wrong hands then chaos will follow. You must be trained to use your gift as effectively as possible. But you must also be able to defend and kill those who threaten you without your gift. Think of it as your last resort. I will train you, I will form you into the perfect soldier.”

Your head was spinning from everything Danzo was telling you, not knowing whether to believe him or not. Your eyes searched his face and posture for any tell that he was lying but you found none. Still analyzing his words from before, you stiffened as you asked him an important question.

“Y-you s-said you were g-going to do a procedure on m-me. Wh-what is it?”

His face broke into a sinister smile and one of the cloaked figures stepped closure to your bare body. The figure cloaked in red lowered his hood to reveal a young man with silver hair and round glasses. His hair was pulled into a low ponytail and his hand quickly adjusted his glasses. When his eyes met yours he allowed a sweet smile to grace his young features. 

_That’s...not what I was expecting. His glasses make him look like Dr. Zolla though._

“Hello Ayumi-chan, my name is Kabuto. I’m going to be one of your future mentors. I will also be leading your sealings today.”

_Excuse me?_

“S-sealings?”

“Don’t worry Ayumi-chan, I promise it will only hurt for a minute. I certainly don’t want to hurt my protégé too much!”

At his statement Danzo moved away and allowed Kabuto to come close and begin inspecting your abdominal stitchings. You winced and flinched when his nimble fingers began to poke it and you bit your lip to stifle a scream when he forced a finger into your wound. His eyes traveled from your wound, to your face, to your chest and then back to your wound. 

“You have a high tolerance for pain Ayumi-chan, very useful for your future procedures. Danzo-sama, with your permission, I’d like to start now.”

Danzo simply waved his hand and the other two ROOT agents flanked your strapped body. They undid the straps and hauled your naked body off of the table, dragging you to a chair in the far corner of the room. Once seated, another machine was brought closer to you until it was firmly latched onto your upper body and head. You were visibly shaken by the time you wear firmly strapped into the contraption, tears were gathering in your eyes but you refused to give them the satisfaction of knowing you were spooked. 

“Torune, make sure she doesn’t reopen her stitches. Fū, pay close attention to Kabuto. You will be learning this technique soon enough. Kabuto, please proceed.”

“By your order Danzo-sama. Ayumi-chan, I apologize in advance for this. I promise I’ll teach you very neat iryo-nin techniques to make up for it.”

You wanted to ask him what was about to happen but you had no time to do so before you heard the sound of a medical drill powering on. You struggled against your restraints, feeling the stitches come apart slowly but all to quickly a ROOT agent, Torune, touched you and paralyzed you. 

You couldn’t move, you could still speak and blink and breath but you couldn’t get your arms and legs to respond. Finally the tears you were so desperately trying to hold back, fell. They fell with a ferocity you hadn’t expressed in decades, since your first year in the Red Room. 

Kabuto stepped close to you and parted your hair evenly down the middle. He began to hum a tune as he pressed the tip of the drill into your skin. Then, without hesitating, he turned the drill on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was that worth the wait? Hopefully it wasn't too bad, next chapter should be up within the next 4-5 days!


	5. 네게 돌아가 (Go back to You)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything begins to fall apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit all over the place, so I apologize for that. Also there may be some triggering content within the chapter, it's never explicitly stated and it's left rather ambiguous but just know that it's there.

Sarutobi Asuma was going to murder the entire hospital staff. One day ago his goddaughter had been brought in after being attacked by a group of unknown assailants and the staff had been properly informed. They had set up a schedule to make sure someone with both adequate medical expertise and fighting experience was always with Ayumi and yet somehow she still went missing. 

When Asuma and Shikaku had first walked into the hospital they were ecstatic. Ayumi’s surgery had ended late the day before but they were assured they could see her today if her condition allowed it. 

Walking in and having a horde of medical personnel shout nonsense at them raised a red flag. Having the majority of the medical staff bow deeply as an apology raised more. Asuma was already fearing the worst, his goddaughter hadn’t made it through the night, she succumbed to her injuries, her heart finally gave out from the strain. Shikaku had been the one to angrily demand what the commotion was about. 

“Shikaku-san, we swear we were doing our best to keep your daughter under a watchful eye but there are so many patients to attend to and we’ve been short staffed for months..”

“What are you trying to say woman? Spit it out!”

“Your daughter is gone. She’s disappeared.”

And then all hell broke loose. Shikaku had angrily berated the hospital staff for their lack of security and had nearly thrown arms with a snobby doctor who blamed Ayumi’s disappearance on Shikaku’s notoriety throughout the elemental nations. 

Asuma wasn’t much better. He had told Shikaku that while he was off speaking with the hokage about the disappearance, he would find Kakashi and see if they could find a lead. Finding Kakashi had been easy, it was early morning so that meant he was probably at the memorial stone. 

As he drew closer to his longtime friend he could see a mix of emotions swirling beneath his mask.

“Kakashi, Shikaku needs us at the hospital. Ayumi’s been taken.”

That one simple sentence was all it took to get Kakashi’s undivided attention before the two elite jounin were off.

***

_“Take Shikamaru somewhere safe!”_

_“Yes!”_

_“Don't let your guard down, Choji!”_

_“Okay!”_

_“Reinforcements are you okay?! First Captain Asuma.”_

_“Asuma Sensei! He still has a heartbeat! Choji! Take Asuma Sensei to the Hidden Leaf Hospital right now! Ino, you go along with him and use your Medical Ninjutsu to heal him as much as possible! Hurry!”_

_“I got it!”_

_“Damn! We'll hold them back.”_

_“Meanwhile, you get Asuma out of here!”_

_“Asuma Sensei! Ino, Choji! Hurry up and get Asuma out of here! Now! I'm telling you! Stay still until we get back! He's about to die!”_

_“Choji! Ino! Hurry up!”_

_“I'll use my Medical Ninjutsu!”_

_“No, no more, I'm done. Even I know that. You all must realize it, too.”_

_“Shut up! Don't speak!”_

_“Here And here, too?! They got four vital spots. There's nothing more I can do…”_

_“Now I think I finally realize why the Third did what he did. I have some last words I'd like to say to Ino, Choji and Shikamaru.”_

_“Sensei, you shouldn't talk anymore-”_

_“Choji, Ino, these are Asuma Sensei's last words listen carefully.”_

_Ino, Choji and your brother were kneeling next to Asuma’s prone form. Asuma was dying. Choji and Ino seemed to believe he could be saved but your brother quickly shot down their hopes. Never had you seen your brother look so devastated, so broken. Asuma was like a brother to Shikamaru, his death would change him in more ways than one._

_You couldn’t allow Asuma to die, he was your godfather. He loved you and you loved him. Turning away at the heartbreaking revelation of Kurenai’s pregnancy you added to your resolve. You would save everyone you loved and kill those that even thought about causing them harm._

***

Ayumi had been missing for forty-eight hours and Kakashi was about four minutes away from having a nervous breakdown. He, Asuma and the vast majority of chunin and genin had been searching the village for any signs of her abduction but so far had found nothing. 

Everyone knew the odds of finding her alive were almost non existent but no one had voiced it. The Nara clan was in total disarray, nobody could believe that the youngest daughter of the clan head could be targeted. Nara Ayumi was a lively little girl who befriended anyone she could, she was spectacularly bright but never used her intelligence to gloat or berate others. She had come to understand Kakashi’s emotions, something no one had been able to do since his sensei was alive. 

On days she wasn’t with Gai she would join him at the memorial stone. No words were ever spoken and she never complained about the long hours he spent there, she would simply sit there with him. Sometimes she would bring small candies and trinkets and other times she would clean the stone thoroughly. 

The young girl was an enigma, truly peculiar and yet Kakashi couldn’t help the growing love he held for her. She was everything Kakashi had been in his youth, back when it had been just him and his father. She didn’t deserve to suffer as he did and yet here he was, instructing his pack to sniff out any new bodies in the early stages of decay in or around Konoha. 

As his pack led him out of the village and into the nearby forest his mind wandered to the explosion three days ago. He had gone through countless scenarios in his head of how the events could have been changed or possibly stopped but he reached the same conclusion everytime: they couldn’t have been stopped

Whoever was after Nara Ayumi was not going to stop until they had her, that much was made clear by them entering the Nara forest, a forbidden act punishable by execution for anyone outside of the Nara clan. Kakashi could only pray that if the group was willing to go to such lengths for the girl then perhaps they planned to keep her alive. He was brought out of his daze when Pakkun nipped his ear.

“Oi Kakashi, we smell fresh blood about a mile west of here. Get a move on.”

Focusing on the task at hand, Kakashi steeled himself for whatever his pack may be leading him to. As they landed in a densely packed section of the forest Kakashi tensed, the smell of blood matched the blood from the Nara forest, a blood confirmed to have belonged to Ayumi-chan. Cutting through the thick shrubbery, Kakashi recoiled at the sight of said little girl. She was naked, her chest was horribly bruised, her wounds infected and she was bleeding from her nose but no outward signs of more sinister deeds were evident. 

Kakashi ordered for his pack to retrieve Shikaku, the Hokage and Morino Ibiki before kneeling down and checking for a pulse. Feeling the coldness of her neck against his fingertips made him bite his lip, not feeling a pulse made his eyes water and his throat close up. He kept his fingers pressed against her neck for a bit longer, longer than he had anyone before, hoping that whatever God existed would grant him this one miracle and make him feel a heartbeat. 

God must have taken pity on him because not long after wishing for a heart beat, Kakashi felt it. It was very weak and dangerously slow but Ayumi-chan’s heart was beating, she was alive. 

Shakily releasing a breath and hastily wiping his eyes, Kakashi began to assess the situation. Ayumi-chan was alive, more hurt than before and possibly sexually assaulted, yes, but alive nonetheless. Bull gently leaned against him, giving him as much comfort as he could given the circumstances. 

Kakashi knew better than to touch Ayumi-chan, he wasn’t a medic so he easily could worsen her situation. Instead he ordered the remaining few of his pack to guard the girl while he went off and punched a few trees only stopping when he felt the familiar chakra signatures of his Hokakge, Shikaku and Ibiki arrive behind him. 

Kakashi had found the discovery of Ayumi-chan to be a horrible experience, he hadn’t felt such a mix of emotions in a very long time. And yet as he watched Nara Shikaku’s eerie blank face crack into a sorrowful expression he couldn’t help but feel that perhaps there were worse things to experience. Like, perhaps, the death of a child.

***

When you woke you were exactly where you assumed you would be, the hospital. You clearly remembered the game of hide and seek, the chase, the explosions and then the aftermath which consisted of your dad and a wolf talking to you. 

Scanning your surroundings you were happy to see your entire family sleeping on a couch in the corner, Asuma and Ensui were asleep in plastic chairs and Kakashi was reading his porn by the window. Looking towards the clock perpendicular to your bed, you were barely able to make out the time, 2:13 am. 

Attempting to swallow, you choked on the sheer dryness of your mouth and throat, drawing Kakashi’s attention towards you. Smiling in embarrassment you hauled yourself into an upright position, wincing when your head began to pound. In an instant Kakashi was by your side and gently asking you to lay back down. You swatted at his pushing hands and croaked about wanting a bit of warm water. He kept pestering you to lay back down but you were resistant, if you laid back down you would surely fall back asleep and you wanted so desperately to be awake, especially after your dream of Asuma. 

Seeing as Kakashi wasn’t going to be of help you raised your ruined voice to a louder volume, effectively waking up the entire room. Your mother was the first to rush to your bedside and kiss you multiple times on your face, though she was quickly followed by your uncle and brother. Your father stayed behind taking in the scene for a bit before leaving to retrieve a doctor. 

“Oh my baby, how are you feeling? Are you in pain? Who took you? Did you see their faces? Could you describe them to a sketch artist? What did they do to you? Did they…”

As your mother continued to voice frantic questions you couldn’t help but be thoroughly confused. 

_Is she sleep deprived? Am I still dreaming? What the hell is she talking about?_

Your uncle had shushed your mother, telling her that all of those questions were overwhelming you. Still, everyone was looking at you as if expecting you to answer. So you did.

“...what?”

Before you could question anything else the door opened, revealing the blond beauty that had treated you since you were born. She smiled at you and demanded everyone give you room to breath.

Walking closer to your bed she overlooked the machines and read your chart, holding up a green hand to your abdomen and head before speaking. 

“Nara Ayumi, how are you feeling right now?”

“Thirsty.”

“I see, there’s not much I can do about that right now. Please follow my finger with your eyes.”

As you did so you couldn’t help but start to wonder why you weren’t allowed to drink water. The blonde beauty continued to ask you to do simple tasks like wiggling your toes, counting to fifty, touching your hands behind your back and naming your entire family. Her last request was to recite everything you remembered before going to sleep and so you did. 

“The clan heirs and I were playing hide and seek in the dark, Kiba-kun was IT first so we all went into the Nara forest to hide. I was planning on hiding in a sinkhole on the westside of the forest but after a few minutes of running, I realized that I was going in circles. It was a genjutsu. I know to break a genjutsu one has to either flare their chakra or harm themselves, I did both. There was a group waiting for me, I couldn’t see their faces or any village symbol on them. They chased me, tried to trap me with ninja wire, that’s how I got cut on my arms and legs. Then one of them managed to stab my thigh with a kunai. I was getting away when I heard Papa call for me so I yelled back. Then one of them grabbed me, he choked me and told me that it was my destiny to be with them. Then he..he exploded. The entire forest started exploding so I had to think quickly if I wanted to live. I punched the ground as hard as I could to create a small crater and lay there to not be hit by flames of debris. Umm then Papa was there.. and a dog! The dog could talk, he had an eyepatch and looked more like a wolf than a dog. Papa kissed my head before I fell back asleep.”

“What else?”

“...nothing else? I woke up to Kakashi-nii reading his porn but that’s it.”

At your revelation the adults started whispering amongst themselves until your father approached you. His face was hard and held no real emotion aside from indifference. You smiled at him and reached for him regardless of his demeanor but paused when he pushed aside your arms.

“Ayumi, do you recollect anything of your abduction? Yes or no?”

“Abduction? Papa what are you talking about?” 

“It’s a yes or no question Ayumi. Answer it.”

You had never heard your father sound so stern with you, more questions filled your mind but you figured answering him would spurn his anger. 

“No papa, I have no recollection of being abducted. But why does that matter I wasn’t abdu-”

“Enough with the stupid questions Ayumi! Learn your place and answer my goddamn questions without delay!”

You flinched at your father’s outburst and and your family tensed but no one made any effort to defend you. Swallowing around the ball forming in your throat and blinking back tears, you lowered your head and nodded.

“Sorry papa.”

Both he and the doctor continued to question you and you diligently answered. This went on for almost half an hour before your father threw open the door to your room, muttered an angry “useless” under his breath and stalked out. 

You were utterly confused and hurt by his actions from the last hour, he was curt and rude and rough with you, a complete opposite of his usual self. Your hurt must have shown on your face because your mother was quick to comfort you and explain a bit of the situation.

“He’s under a lot of stress right now, sweet pea. He doesn’t mean to hurt you.”

You could only nod slightly while hastily wiping away the small tears that had escaped your eyes. Forcing yourself to calm down and speak clearly ou turned to the doctor.

“Sensei, did I suffer from a perforated bowel or some other type of traumatic injury to my abdomen?”

The blondes eyes widened before a sly smirk formed on her face.

“What makes you say that?”

“I’ve asked for water plenty of times and yet no one has made any effort to give me some. Most doctors encourage drinking water after surgery or waking up from a long sleep as a faster way of keeping the patient hydrated. The only reason they wouldn’t and actively avoid giving the patient water is if the patient had some sort of traumatic bowel or stomach injury. So I ask you, which do I have?”

The woman smiled and laughed for a full minute before patting your head affectionately. 

“Ya know gaki, I don’t like kids at all. They’re weak and stupid and cry too easily but somehow I think I like you. Yes you suffered a traumatic injury to your bowels, so much so that the majority of your intestines were hanging outside of your body.”

At her jolly response you blanked a bit, slowly your hand moved to your abdomen but you felt no pain. 

“Oh, that sucks. Is that all?”

Again the busty blonde let out howls of laughter before calming down and poking your forehead. 

“Yeah that’s it gaki. Are you in any pain right now? Any sort of discomfort?”

“No but I am mighty thirsty.”

“I’ll have a nurse bring in a pitcher and some cups, you should try to rest some more before getting up or doing anything strenuous. I’ll come back around 9. Don’t die.”

As she walked away, you turn to your family and began to talk to them. They filled you in on the last week, you had apparently gone missing for three days before turning back up. The rest of the time you had spent asleep. Your father was losing days of sleep trying to track down the attackers but so far had found nothing.

_Yeah I guess if I was in dad’s shoes I’d be stressed out too._

With your new found understanding of your father’s sour mood you settled back down and continued to talk.

***

Three months had passed since you were discharged from the hospital and still your father was curt and emotionless with you. His investigation into who was targeting you had gone nowhere and he let his frustrations out on you. You understood his position, plenty of times Steve would be in that same one. If a lead turned out to be nothing he would curse and lash out at anyone who looked at him twice. 

Your days were much the same as they had been before your birthday except now everyone was more attentive towards you. You continued your training with Gai and Lee, growing stronger with every passing day. Genma and Raidō kept you close to them when the three of you would travel the town and Shikamaru and Asuma never let you out of their sight. 

Finding time to yourself became almost impossible, you had read those scrolls from your father’s office and were itching to try out a few of the jutsus. So here you were, sneaking out of your house at two in the morning. Once you were sure your parents weren’t going to wake you dashed to the furthest training grounds from the Nara compound. 

Running through various stretches before calling on your chakra you failed to notice two eyes watching you. 

_So the scroll said you should feel your chakra in its natural state within your body, to modify it and create ninjutsus you have to envision and then manipulate your chakra to mimic whatever nature you’re aiming for. There’s doton, suiton, katon, raiton, and futon...which do I think is the coolest?_

You were keeping your hands glowing blue with your chakra as you tried to settle on one chakra nature to focus on. Settling for raiton, you readied yourself and began to envision the feel of lighting in your hands. Closing your eyes and feeling your chakra begin to change, you tried to remember the exact hand signs for a raiton technique named ‘Powerful Breath’. Settling for a simple dragon, tiger, hare you inhaled as deep as you could and raised two fingers to rest right below the stream of lighting you would hopefully be releasing. 

Half a second before you released your breath, you felt it. It started in the back of your throat and quickly moved forward until it was flying out of your mouth. You blinked in surprise at the sizable jet stream of water that was now assaulting the shrubbery. You noticed that as you began to tire, the jet would weaken so you willed more of your chakra into the water and began to circular breathe. 

Once you felt yourself get a bit lightheaded you abruptly cut off your chakra and the jet ended. 

_That wasn’t lightning but water’s cool too._

Pride flared inside of you as you took in the flooded training grounds, it was absolutely ruined. Your pride quickly turned into fear as you realized how much trouble you would get into for not only ruining a training ground but also sneaking out. 

Beginning to think of excuses you failed to notice someone walking up behind you. Tensing, you let instinct take over as you dodged the persons reaching arm and gained the upper hand. You quickly had the person underneath your body, their arms pinned in such a way that you could easily break them should you need to. 

“Oi brat! Get the hell off of me, I’m not gonna reprimand you.”

Your eyes widened when they took in the form of the Hokage, you were pinning the Hokage beneath you after ruining one of her training grounds. You quickly released the woman and fell to your knees, bowing as deep as you can, making yourself dirty with mud. 

“Hokage-sama, I’m so sorry for attacking you. I should have turned around to check who you were before acting so disrespectfully. I’m also extremely sorry for flooding the training ground. Any punishment you wish to give me I will take, just please do not let this sway your opinion of the Nara clan.”

“Calm down brat, I should be the one saying sorry. I didn’t mean to spook you so badly. C’mon kid lift yourself up, be proud of your ability to take down a grown woman and flood this entire area.”

You slowly lifted yourself onto your feet but kept your head bowed, shame colored your face and ears as you took in the ruined scenery. The once firm ground was now mushy and unstable, the brush was soaked and floppy rather than dry and stout and a few trees were to longer upright either. The hokage was scanning the scenery as well, whistling and moving her hands to her hips.

“Nara Ayumi, you really are something else aren’t you? Tell me, how did you learn Suiton Mizurappa?” 

“I read about it, Hokage-sama.”

“Where?”

“An old scroll my father had in his study.”

“Shikaku let you inside of his study? That’s the first time I’ve heard of this, he says not even Yoshino is allowed inside.”

“..well..not exactly..”

“Oh? Sweet little Ayumi-chan snuck into her father’s study and took a scroll without permission? And here I thought you were God’s gift to the Nara clan.”

Again, shame filled your body. It was true, everyone believed you to be an angel but you really were a snake. You abused your father’s trust and were able to manipulate those around you to do your bidding. You were the same person you were back with the Avengers, a snake. You did what you wanted and took out anyone who stood in your way. You had abandoned Tony when the Sokovia Accords went into effect and lied to Steve about saving the world together. You were a liar, it was in your blood. 

“Oh my god, I’m kidding! Geez, what happened to the girl I met a few months ago? She was diagnosing herself and sassing me like it was nothing. I’m not upset about the training ground gaki, I’m genuinely impressed.”

At that you lifted your head and searched her eyes for any sign of her lying. You found none.

“You’re impressed? Why?”

“Kid, you just performed a C-rank jutsu as if it was nothing. I saw you dull the stream of water before abruptly adding massive power to it. How else do you think those trees got fucked up? Tell me, is this your first ninjutsu, or have you been building up to this?”

“It’s my first ninjutsu but I’ve been able to manipulate my chakra since...well since as long as I can remember. Gai sensei and Lee-kun help me incorporate it into my taijutsu.”

At that revelation the Hokakge smirked and demanded you follow her. As you left the ruined training ground and entered another you grew confused. 

_Is she really not gonna ask me to fix that shit? Is she gonna tell dad, oh god please don’t tell dad._

Instead of answering any of the questions you asked, the Hokage simply led the two of you to the middle of the new training grounds. 

“You’ve been working on chakra control with your taijutsu? Show me. Let’s spare right here, right now. Don’t hold back.”

Before you could respond, she was flashing in front of you and punching your body with so much force you were sent flying into a tree. Shaking away any dizziness you barely were able to dodge the next series of punches, squatting down and sweeping your leg out in an attempt to trip her. She jumped away and began to taunt you though you weren’t really bothered by it. It wasn’t until she started mocking your family and friends that you charged at her not as Nara Ayumi but as the Black Widow. 

***

An hour and a half later, you were barely able to stay on your feet. You now understood why the Hokage was feared by many, she was brutal. Once you had come at her with real intent to hurt, she too had changed her stance and fought you with the intent to subdue you. It was comically unfair, everytime you would land a nasty punch or kick she would instantly heal. In the end you had lost simply because you had no way of healing yourself. Your body naturally slowed with the growing number of injuries and your chakra reserves were nowhere near as vast as a Senju’s. 

“You’re extremely skilled, you fight like it’s second nature. Your body follows through with any motion you will it to make. You fight at a chunin level and yet you haven’t even started the academy. Your taijutsu is lightyears ahead of my apprentice’s and she’s thirteen years older than you.”

“Thank you Hokage-sama.”

“I don’t believe for one second that you’re simply a prodigy. Your fighting style is too distinct, a perfect mix of Konoha standard, Maito Gai’s and some third style I’ve never seen before. So tell me, how is that possible?”

You didn’t allow your shock to show, you were trained better than that. Instead you cocked an eyebrow and tilted your head to one side. You asked her to elaborate but instead the Hokage simply pressed further, going so far as to rat you out to your family if you didn’t answer her truthfully.

“Alright, alright. I came up with my fighting style, I did that all by myself. I’ve been watching team eight train for a while so I tried reconstructing their moves into something I felt was more original and suited towards my style of fighting. The Nara clan utilizes a taijutsu that focuses on quick arm movements and strong legs but as you can see, my legs aren’t strong enough to handle that yet, that’s why I created my own style. I also was hoping to get really good at fighting with it so I could show papa and mama that I CAN become strong. I can practice politics and be a strong, independent woman. I can bring honor to my clan with my shinobi skills, not just as a genius.”

You weren’t totally lying, you simply were leaving out a few key pieces to the truth. For a long while neither of you spoke, Tsunade was eyeing your microexpressions, looking for any tell of your lie. When she obviously found none she signed and pat your head.

“You shouldn’t be worrying over bringing your clan honor, you should be having fun as a kid. I like you Ayumi-chan and from what I’ve seen today, you have spectacular control over your chakra. You could become a wicked medic if you wanted to.”

“I could? I thought you had to have massive reserves to become a doctor?”

“Not necessarily kiddo, you just have to have excellent technique and control. You already have the control, now you would just need the technique. I’m willing to take you in as my second apprentice, if that’s something you’re interested in.”

_Oh wait a minute here. If I become an apprentice to the strongest ninja in the village then the clan will be ecstatic right? Plus I can probably sneak into some archives and get more high ranking ninjutsu scrolls..maybe a space-time ninjutsu. Alright I’m in._

You searched her eyes from lies but found none. Smiling widely you agreed and shook hands with the beauty. She assured you that everything that had happened tonight would stay between the two of you and then escorted you back home. 

Once you were back inside the house you quickly locked yourself in the bathroom and showered away all of the dirt and grime from your night out. Once finished, you made your way into your room and crept under the covers. You fell asleep almost instantly.

***

The months following your new apprenticeship were the best you had ever lived. Everyday you would meet with Tsunade and everyday she would beat a new medic technique into you. Starting with keeping a fish alive once it was out of water, you quickly realized just what she meant when she said your control was superb. Any exercise she gave you, you would practice diligently and master by the end of the day. 

Tsunade’s other apprentice, Haruno Sakura, was less than pleased to be shown up by a toddler. Your success fueled her motivation to be better but you also got the impression that she did not like you. Regardless, you were happy. 

Your family had reacted differently to your news. Your mother had chewed her lip and held her hands nervously, your brother had lifted you from your spot and spun you around, your uncle had shouted with glee and taken you to eat a celebratory ice cream and your father had simply stalked out of the house. Your father’s reaction hurt, ever since your birthday he had been cold with you, preferring to spend time playing shogi with Shikamaru than teaching you. Word had spread to the clan elders and they sent you letters of their joy. 

With the start of your new apprenticeship you saw Genma and Raidō less, though they always made sure to bring you back a souvenir every time they went out on missions. You also stopped accompanying your brother and his friends to their training with Asuma, they always made sure you knew how much they missed you. 

Aside from your father’s coldness the months leading up to your third birthday were some of the best you have ever experienced, both here and back in your old life.

***

“Alright Ayumi-chan, its tradition that I sit you down and play a game of shogi with you. Shikaku had Shikamaru playing by the time he was three so he should at least already be teaching you the basics right?”

You and Asuma were on your patio, he was in charge of babysitting you while the rest of your family was out. When he had said the two of you were going to “do something fun” you had assumed he meant sparring or building a fort. Instead he dragged you outside, into the chilly fall air and sat you down in front of your father’s shogi board. 

Your eyes widened at the implication Asuma was making. You couldn’t play on this board, this was your father’s favorite shogi board. He only used it with Shikamaru and Ensui. Besides, you hadn’t the slightest clue as to how to play. 

“Asuma-nii, we can’t play on this board, this is father’s special board he uses to play with aniki and Ensui ojisan. Besides I don’t even know how to play. Can’t we just build a fort instead?”

Asuma’s eyes widened for a split second before he covered his surprise. It was quiet between the two of you for a while, your eyes stayed unwavering on his until he finally let out a deep sigh and scratched his beard.

“Are you sure your father hasn’t taught you shogi? I would have thought that given your intelligence and capabilities you would already be a pro.”

“No, he’s never mentioned shogi to me, I would have remembered.”

“Well then, I guess it’s your godfather’s time to shine. I’m not the best shogi player but I play your brother often enough to know a thing or two. Now pay close attention, these nine pieces are your pawns..”

And with that your godfather spent hours teaching you the basics of shogi. It was boring as shit but you were apparently really great at it, beating Asuma on your second try. 

You knew how important shogi was to your father, how he took great pride in seeing his son play his favorite game. It hurt to know that he hadn’t taught you something he had taught Shikamaru at your age. It made you start to wonder if at some point he would stop being involved in your life completely.

Not wanting your sour mood to show you quickly focused on the game of shogi and made small talk with your godfather. 

*** 

Once you were three years old a lot changed. Choji and Ino became seasoned chunin so the genin team worked less hours together. Ino had actually taken an apprenticeship under Shizune-san while her best friend Sakura, had an apprenticeship under Tsunade-sama alongside you. 

Speaking of Hokage-sama, you had basically become her second adopted daughter after she took you on as her apprentice. She quickly found that she could get away with doing little to no paperwork if she was with you so she spent a large majority of her days “monitoring your progress”. The two of you would go out to eat together and you even helped her with her gambling. She had grown on you and you on her. 

The more in tune with your chakra you became, the more you began to wonder about your situation. 

_How did I end up here? Did the soul stone just spit me out in a new plane of existence? If that’s true then shouldn’t there be another person here, Gamora?_

Your ability to henge was superb, meaning you had unlimited access to the high ranking sections of the library. The more you read the more you wondered, could you somehow use space-time ninjutsu to travel back to your old life, your life back with the Avengers. It was something you definitely wanted to try so during the very limited free time you had, you spent reading and taking notes. 

***

Waking up had been difficult, you were raw with emotion and weren’t sure if you could face your father during breakfast. Regardless of what you were feeling you still had to show up to the Hokage’s office in an hour for more training so you quickly changed into some plain leggings and blank, black shirt before going into the restroom and fixing up your appearance. You literally sat on top of the toilet seat for twenty minutes just trying to kill time so you could rush out of the house without confronting your father. 

Grabbing your small backpack you stepped down the stairs lightly, you could hear some jolly chatter coming from the dinner table. Your father was asking your brother about his recent mission and even recounting some funny stories from his time as an active chunin. At your father’s happy tone you felt your heart break, you were the reason he would get upset. The problem was you. 

Swallowing your emotions, you quickly made your way downstairs and into your father’s view. You kept your head down and didn’t spare a glance at your family. Your mother was the one to speak to you first.

“Ah how nice of you to finally join us, sweet pea. Come here, I’ll make you a plate before you go. It’s been such a long time since we were all together for breakfast.”

“I’m already late, shishou will be angry if I take longer. I won’t be home until late tonight. Bye.”

Hastily strapping on your sandals you ignored your brother’s shouts for you to wait and left the house. Your stomach was growling loudly but you wouldn’t dare set foot back in that house until you were certain you wouldn’t have to see your father. You had a long history of dealing with feelings of rejection and hate but somehow having your father feel that way about you hurt you more than anytime before. 

So caught up in your feelings you failed to notice the townspeople murmuring and pointing at you. You ducked into a fruit stall and picked up a bag of grapes. Just as you were about to pay, someone “accidentally” poured their drink all over you. 

“Oh my I’m so sor- oh it’s the Nara prodigy. Well in that case I take back my apology, that’s for the massacre you’re bound to do. Hokage-sama really ought to just kill you now before any more atrocities occur.”

_Excuse me?_

“I’m sorry, did you just say I’m going to massacre my clan?”

“DID YOU HEAR THAT? EVERYONE, THE NARA PRODIGY JUST SAID SHE”S GOING MASSACRE THE ENTIRE NARA CLAN!”

“What? No! I would never do such a thing!”

No matter how much you tried to persuade the growing group of townsfolk that you weren’t a crazy killer they wouldn’t listen. More and more people began to criticise and claim false narratives about you until they eventually began getting a bit violent. They claimed that if they simply killed you now then Konoha would avoid another atrocity like the Uchiha. 

You managed to duck out of the growing mob and dash to the hokage tower without a scratch but you were still immensely shaken. 

_Why do they think I wanna hurt my clan? What the fuck is going on?_

Sparring a quick glance at a nearby clock mounted on a wall, your eyes widened at the fact that you were thirteen minutes late. Deciding to worry about your reputation later, you sprinted the entire way to your shishou’s office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, how was that? I hope it wasn't too bad, next update should be out within the next 4-5 days.


	6. 尊ぶ (Valued)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ayumi decides her future occupation, plays a game of shogi, and makes an impression on the legendary pervert.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who doesn't love a bit of filler?

_“Love is the reason why there is pain. When we lose someone precious to us, hate is born. Vengeance is the product of that hate and death follows. But in death there is only more hate. This will give rise to more pain. In this cursed world we live in, it is a cycle of hatred that will not cease."_

_A man with orange hair and multiple piercings was standing over Naruto. In his hands a black rod came down to stab the Hyuga heiress. Everything was quiet, then Naruto’s eyes bleed red._

***

_Now a skinny man with red hair was speaking to Naruto._

_“You ask me why I’m doing this? My answer won’t change anything. But if we have a little chat, then maybe. My goal is something not even Jiraiya could achieve. I’ve told you before. Through death I will bring Peace and Justice.”_

_“Peace? Justice? You’ve gotta be kidding. You’ve gotta be freaking kidding me. My Master! My Teachers! My Friends! My Village! How can you say that when you destroyed them all?!”_

_Naruto was red in the face when he yelled back. His eyes held unshed tears and his fists were curled in anger._

“Then what do you want?” 

_“I want to defeat you and bring peace to the world of ninjas!”_

_“I see. That’s wonderful. That is justice. But my family, my friends, my village were all destroyed too. Do you really think the ninjas of Konoha are the only ones allowed to talk about peace and justice?”_

_At this Naruto hesitated. Confusion crossed his face._

_“What do you mean?_

_The red head closed his rinnegan eyes and spoke._

_“The land of fire and Konoha have grown too big. The nations make war to protect their interests and national gain, if not, the people would starve. But the battleground was always our small village, our small land. And each time, our land laid waste and people were left impoverished. After many wars, the great land stabilized and our small country was left to bear the wounds of wars. We both want the same thing. We both want the peace Jiraiya spoke of. You and I are no different. We’re both working for our own justice. The justice I have carried out against Konoha, is exactly the same as what you’re trying to carry out against me. Everyone feels the pain of loss the same. We both know that pain. You are working for your justice, and I for mine. We are just ordinary people driven to revenge in the name of justice. But if revenge is called justice, then that justice breeds yet more revenge. And that becomes a chain of hatred, living within it, aware of the past, predicting the future. That is what it means to know history. We cannot help but know that people cannot understand each other. The world of ninjas is ruled by hatred. How would you face this hatred to build peace? Let me hear you answer.”_

_Naruto didn’t speak for a long time. When he did only honesty and resignation shone through his words._

_“I don’t know. I just don’t know.”_

_The redhead sighed and nodded his head. He understood Naruto’s lack of answer._

_“I created Akatsuki in order to break that chain of hatred. I can do it. That’s why I need the nine-tailed beast’s power. With the power of all the tailed beasts, I will build a weapon far more powerful than what it took to destroy this village. It will be able to destroy an entire land in an instant. The world will know true pain, and the fear of that pain will put an end to war. It will lead the world to stability and peace.”_

_“That’s not real peace. It’s nothing but a lie!”_

_“People are stupid. If I don’t do this, there will be no peace. Eventually, time will pass and the pain will heal. Eventually, checkmate’s power will weaken and people will begin fighting again. This time, they will use the weapon themselves and once more know true pain. And for a short time, peace will come again. It will give birth to a short period of peace within the endless chain of hatred. That’s my wish.”_

_A blue haired woman appeared when the redhead rinnegan user began to cough up blood._

_“Nagato, don’t overdo it. You’ve used up so much chakra.”_

_“Konan, I can see peace.”_

***

_“You are a curious fellow. You remind me of how I once was. I wasn't able to believe in Jiraiya. Nor...could I believe in myself. However...I have a feeling that, unlike me, you will walk towards a different future. I think I shall believe in you...Naruto Uzumaki."_

_“Nagato, it’ll kill you!”_

_“Konan, forgive me. Rinne Tensei!”_

***  
“Kakashi-nii, what does being a shinobi mean to you?”

The two of you were at the memorial stone. You had just finished cleaning it and where now tracing the names carved into it. More specifically you were tracing Nohara Rin, knowing how much meaning that name had to Kakashi.

“Well, it means I protect and serve my village. My faith lies unwaveringly with the Hokage and Konoha’s best interest.”

_Well that means close to nothing for me._

“I see..”

“It also means I can protect the ones I love, like you chibi-chan! Why, are you considering becoming a shinobi?”

Were you? You didn’t know. You wanted all of the cool perks a shinobi received but also the freedom to act when you deemed it necessary. If you became a shinobi then you were surrendering your right to choose, you would be working under someone with their own agenda. It was the Sokovia accords all over again. 

“..no I don’t think I want to be a shinobi, Kakashi-nii.”

“Then what do you wish to be when you grow older chibi-chan?”

You wanted to go back. You wanted to see your friends, you wanted to go back to saving the world from aliens and rouge super soldiers. You didn’t want to deal with your father or the rising hate directed towards you from the citizens of your village, you didn’t want to feel trapped in the world of politics. You wanted to be free. You wanted to do good without the need for a leash. 

“I want to be a hero.”

Your response must have either shocked him or bored him because he never responded. 

***

“Aniki, why doesn’t father love me anymore?”

“What? Why do you think he doesn’t love you?”

You and Shikamaru were at home playing a slow game of shogi. Both of you had already completed your duties for the day and were simply relaxing before going to bed. You had been thinking about your now nonexistent relationship with your father. 

“He doesn’t talk to me unless he’s reprimanding me and even then it’s for small things that don’t matter. He never taught me how to play shogi even though I know he taught you when you were my age. Asuma-nii had to teach me. He smiles for everyone else but when he sees me his mood just plummets. Ever since that incident in the Nara forest, he’s changed with me. Mom keeps telling me that it’s because he’s stressed but why is he only stressed when he sees me?”

“Things are complicated Ayumi-ch-”

“Then explain it to me! Explain to me why father would rather ignore my existence than smile at me!”

“Imouto, some things are better left unsaid alright?”

“..he regrets having me, doesn’t he. I’m more trouble than I’m worth.”

“No Ayumi, that’s not it. Look I’m sure he’s just-”

“I’m going to bed.”

And without letting your brother see your tears cascading down your face, you got up and walked straight into your room. Locking the door, you allowed yourself to cry like the child you were. Eventually crying yourself into a fitful sleep. 

***

When you opened your eyes late at night, you knew something was not right. You didn’t know exactly what was going on but something about yourself felt off. You felt like you had to go outside, like you were being called by someone or something. So you got up and went. 

Walking into your chilly front yard revealed two people, both wore masks and cloaks but you couldn’t help but recognize them.

“Fū, Torune, is it time?”

Both shinobi relaxed when you said their names. Fū was the one to answer you.

“Yes Ayumi-chan. Danzo-sama has finally deemed it time for you to start your training with him.”

“Alright, let’s not keep the big man waiting.”

And with that, the three of you were off.

***

“You’re correct, I do intend to make you into a soldier. Except you’re going to be stronger than your father.”

“Any training you give me, I will cherish forever, Danzo-sama. You are Konoha’s greatest assets.”

“You flatter me little one, I simply have many years of experience to pass on. However if you accept this help then it’ll have to stay secret. You can keep a secret can’t you Ayumi-chan?”

“Anything for you Danzo-sama.”

“Perfect. Ayumi-chan, I promise that in two years you will be stronger than your fool of a father. You will never feel weak and rejected again.”

“Danzo-sama, how will you keep this from my family. My father is still tense about the situation from almost two years ago. If I join you, he will not rest until he uncovers us.”

“Yes Ayumi-chan you are right. Normally I would pull you from your home but for you I will make an exception. We will only meet during the nights and when your family is working. They will never know about you being my successor.”

At that a genuine smile made itself evident on his face. 

“Please, now that I am going to teach you call me Danzo sensei. These two men are going to help you get familiar with our training ground, they’ll also give you a special uniform to wear so everyone here knows you are my special pupil.”

At a simple hand gesture the two masked men stepped forward. Dazo placed his large hand on your head and gave you one last smile before he turned and began to leave. 

“Fū, Torune, make sure my child is cared for. Make her feel welcome and answer any questions she may have. She is my special pupil after all.”

“Hai Danzo-sama.”

“Hai Danzo-sama.”

With that he left. There was a mountain of questions you had, Danzo’s behavior was confusing. He seemed grandfatherly with you, nothing like the brutal warhawk you had assumed. You coughed and shivered, remembering that you were wet and cold. One of the two men, Torune, moved closer and removed his cloak, draping it over your small form. 

Turning curious eyes towards his masked face you couldn’t help but feel your heart break.

_Odds are he was taken at my age or older, he’s probably been through horrible things. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help, but I’m here now. I will give you back your freedom._

“Ayumi-chan, let’s get you into warm clothes. Are you hungry? We can get you something to eat. Come. We must introduce you to the rest of the...of our family.” 

Torune fumbled when saying that word and Fū stiffened but neither showed any hostility towards you. 

“Is everyone nice?”

_Play the game, I’m just a little kid who doesn’t know shit._

“Of course, you are Danzo-sama’s special pupil after all.”

At his words he held out his hand to you. You gave him a small smile before grabbing it. He helped you down from your chair and led you closer to Fū. You were led by both men down the dark hallway into a courtyard lit by the moonlight. 

At least one hundred masked, cloaked figures were kneeling in front of a small pedestal. As you drew closer you noticed all of the figures lifted their heads. You were placed on the podium as Fū spoke.

“This is Nara Ayumi. Danzo-sama has chosen her to be his pupil. He asks that we treat her with the respect and kindness she deserves. Should any of you have a problem with that please inform Danzo-sama. Ayumi-chan, would you like to say anything?”

Instinct took over as you bowed and softly mumbled.

“It’s a pleasure to meet all of you please take care of me.”

***

After meeting all one hundred and thirty ROOT members you were led into another room with a dentist chair. A chill ran down your spine and it didn’t go unnoticed by Torune and Fū. Fū bent down to your height and placed a comforting hand atop your head. 

“I know it looks scary but both of us will be here the whole time. Everyone in ROOT gets a cool tattoo on their tongue. Those who are really strong get more tattoos on their body. It’ll hurt a bit but only for a second. Once it’s done we can go get your own custom uniform.”

You nodded but held onto their hands tighter, the chair shared an uncanny resemblance to the one you had been forced into back in the red room. You waited for a while, maybe twenty minutes before Danzo appeared again. 

“Danzo sensei! You’re the one who gives us tattoos?”

Danzo’s face lit up with subtle joy at the change in my way of addressing him. He really did seem like a grandfather.

“That’s right little one, have Torune and Fū already told you what to expect?”

“They said it would hurt but only for a little.”

“That’s right little one, I promise to make it as painless as possible. Now law down for me and be as still as possible.”

You made your way towards the chair and sat down. Immediately you felt like you were back in the red room, the Madame was only seconds away from entering. Your nervousness was clear so Torune spoke.

“Ayumi-chan, would you feel better if we held your hands?” 

“..yes please.”

And so you sat there with Torune holding your left hand while Fū stood close by. You forced your body to calm down, whatever they had in store for you here couldn’t be worse than the red room. Snapping on some latex gloves Danzo moved to stand over you. 

“Alright Ayumi-chan, now just open your mouth and stick your tongue out as far as possible. This tattoo is being placed on your tongue.”

Deciding to keep up the charade you compiled without hesitating. Knowing you needed to keep up appearances you squeezed Tortune's hand as a sign of fear. Danzo ran through at least fifty hand seals in a quick fashion and then touched two of his fingers to the back of your tongue. Instantly burning pain spread through your mouth. Tears gathered in your eyes but you made no noise, whatever interest Danzo had in you had to stay, it was the only way you could set your plan in motion. 

True to their word the pain began to subside after only a few moments. Fū gently wiped the tears before they ran into your hairline as Torune squeezed your small hand. Danzo removed his gloves and helped you to sit up, putting his hand atop your head once more. 

“You’re very brave Ayumi-chan, I knew you would be the perfect pupil for me. Now Fū and Torune will take you to get your own custom uniform and mask. Anything you want you can get. You two, make sure she eats something before returning her back to her room. We’ll see eachother soon little one. Take care.”

With that Danzo once again left you to your two guards. Gently you tugged Torune’s sleeve to grab his attention.

“C-can I get water please?”

A gentle chuckle and a pat on the head later you were walking through the hallways again with a warm water bottle clutched in your hands. You entered a giant room filled to the brim with Anbu issued uniforms, black and white cloaks, and blank masks. You openly gawked at the sheer amount of supplies only snapping back to reality when Fū lightly tapped your back. 

“Let’s find you a couple sets of uniform shall we? Do you have a preferred color?”

“Black and dark blue is fine Fū.”

“Good choice Ayumi-chan.”

Five sets of fitted uniforms later you were given a white cloak with the kanji for ‘Valued’ sewed into the center back. When it came time to pick your mask you already knew what you wanted. 

“Is it possible to get the codename ‘Widow’? “

“Of course Ayumi-chan, would you like to guide us in the design?”

And so a plain white mask became your next veil. Thick black strokes flowed from the center of your mask to the edges, the center resembled that of a spider with a bright red hourglass near your forehead. In the very center of the red hourglass the kanji for kill was painted in a dark burgundy color. 

Everything was as Danzo had stated, whenever you asked for something you were given it, all of your uniforms were custom to your small size and had the kanji for ‘Valued’ sewn into them. When you had asked why it was necessary Torune stated that since you were now Danzo-sama’s pupil you were to be given the same respect as him. 

It was all very unnerving but by the end of the visit you were treated to a BBQ buffett with a vast majority of the members of ROOT, all of whom were very polite and welcoming to you. 

When the Fū and Torune informed you that it was a quarter to four in the morning you asked to be brought back home. Your father usually woke up a quarter past four so it would be best if you made it home before then. Bidding the rest of the members goodmorning you allowed Fū to scoop you up in his arms and head back home.

Body flickering back into your room Fū gently placed you back into your toddler bed and covered you with your blankets. When the time came both he and Torune would come to bring you to your first training session with Danzo-sama, until then you were to go about your life as usual. 

Sleepily nodding to the instructions you failed to notice Fū’s chakra invading your body, you didn’t notice it until they were long gone and your door burst open, revealing your father and brother, kunai in hand and shadows ready. Frightened, you let out a loud shriek and turned tired eyes towards your door. Your brother made a beeline for you and scooped you up into his arms, you weakly turned your head to follow your father’s movements throughout your room. 

His dark eyes were calculated and cold, his chakra vibrating with unspoken vexation. Your brother was much the same, except he kept his chakra more concealed as to not overwhelm you. You were insanely tired and your head was pounding so you couldn’t help but let out a pained whine. Your brother quickly took you out of your room and into his, plopping you onto his bed and leaving quickly. 

You could barely keep your eyes open by the time he returned, a cup of warm milk and your blanket in his arms Placing the cup on his nightstand, he collected you in his arms, effectively wrapping the blanket around you before speaking. 

“Sorry for waking you imouto, there was a strange and unfamiliar chakra signature in your room and given what happened two years ago in the hospital we couldn’t take any chances. You must be pretty tired huh? We did ruin your beauty sleep so for that I apologize. Drink the milk, it’ll help relax you.”

Too tired to fight you allowed him to tip the cup until the warm liquid was filling your mouth. You really must have been tired because a few droplets escaped the corners of your mouth. This caused Shikamaru to gently laugh as he placed the cup onto his beside counter. Shikamaru gathered you up in his arms and crawled under his sheets, laying on his back and placing you onto his chest. He lightly rubbed your back until all you knew was nothing. 

***

Weeks later you were still a bit confused by what had transpired between you and Danzo. Rationally, you understood that he was a bad man. He had essentially killed off the Uchiha clan as a precaution and blamed it on a thirteen year old boy. And yet you couldn’t help but feel extremely grateful to him.

He treated you like a grandfather would his granddaughter, he gave you the attention you so desperately wanted from your father. He praised you when you succeeded in anything and gave you advice when you were having troubles. He made you feel safe and loved and really that’s all you ever wanted.

***

A few weeks before your fourth birthday you finally caved. You had another dream of what was to come and you could no longer stand to keep it all to yourself so you waited until the sun had risen and casually made your way downstairs. You hadn’t been having breakfast with your family for months now, in fact you stopped eating breakfast all together, opting to eat a large lunch instead. 

Today was no different, you dressed in your usual attire, grabbed your backpack and made your way towards the door, pointedly ignoring the stares your family was sending you. Slipping on your sandals you muttered a ‘bye’ before leaving the house. You waited until you were on the outskirts of the compound before body flickering outside of your shishou’s office. Knocking twice and waiting to be granted permission to enter you went over exactly what you wanted to say to her. 

“Ayumi-chan, you’re early today.”

“Hai shishou, I was hoping I could speak to you privately and that includes anbu.”

“Alright give me a second. Anbu, your dismissed until I call for you again. Now then, what do you wish to speak about?”

You inhaled deeply and suddenly a rush of emotions hit you. You never cried in public, especially not in front of people like your shishou and yet here you were. Deciding to rip the bandaid off once and for all you inhaled again and then blurted out.

“I can see the past, present, and future.”

***

After a long and emotional confession on your end, Tsunade had swept you up into her arms and comforted you until you were only sniffling. She hadn’t believed you at first but when you quickly revealed details from the second shinobi world war that hadn’t been officially documented, she gave in. You confessed everything, every event you had dreamed of and every event that was bound to happen, you told her about it all in as much detail as you could muster up. 

“Gaki, I cannot even begin to imagine how you must have felt with such a big burden on your shoulders. Rest assured that I will help you in any way that I can, nobody but myself and Jiraiya will know about your gift. Fuck this explains so much gaki, this is the reason you’ve been training so hard huh? To protect your friends and family?”

You nodded and felt her hold you tighter, unconsciously relaxing into her hold. How long had it been since someone comforted you? Before you knew it, you were sound asleep in your shishou’s arms.

*** 

As much as it pained you to admit, Danzo was an insanely good sensei. One year in ROOT beat ten years in the red room in terms of accumulated power. You could already perform multiple high ranking jutsus with two nature releases: lightning and water. Sensei had been immensely proud at the fact that his pupil held such a strong combination of chakra natures. Danzo-sensei also had plenty of insight to help you when you finally “awaken” your Kagemane no jutsu. Both of you worked together to form jutsus that you coined as “shadow chains” and “shadow ball”, though you were fairly certain at least one of those was a former pokemon move. 

In theory, once you had mastered Kagemane no jutsu then you should be able to produce shadows from any part of your body, not just your own shadow. If you could do so then you could form chains that sprout from your back which paralyze and consume on contact. These chains would be modelled after the famous Uzumaki Chains, only instead of pure chakra they would be made of the users shadows. This would be used as a defensive sealing method. 

The shadow ball idea was really just a rasengan made of shadows. The user would accumulate as much yin chakra into their hands and bring them together, forming a rasengan in both hands. This shadow rasengan could then be thrown or driven into it’s target. This would be a major damage dealer using Kagemane. 

The only problem with these theoretical power moves were that they were just that, theories. The biggest obstacle in being able to actually try and create these jutsus is that the Kagemane no Jutsu was not an actual physical jutsu. It uses the users own shadow, a 2D object, to merge with the shadow of another immobilizing them. To make these jutsus viable then the user had to be able to make their shadows into a 3D extension of themselves. If you and Danzo-sensei could just figure out that one key ingredient to making your shadows go from 2D to 3D then it opened up a whole new realm of possibilities. 

Your taijutsu had also improved greatly, given his old age one may think Danzo would be slow but no! The geezer was almost on par with Rock Lee and his punches left you bloody and bruised. He made sure to emphasize how powerful learning to control the eight inner gates was. When the two of you would spar, he would constantly push you to reach those limiters and break through them. Which is why you can now open gate one through three. 

Genjutsu had not been something you were gifted in but Danzo-sensei had dismissed that saying it was the weakest form of combat. And even then you were above the average chunin in this skill. 

Danzo-sensei also taught you the intricacies of diplomacy and politics. With the rate at which you were improving he knew you would achieve high positions both inside and outside of ROOT so you had to be well versed in local and international politics. 

“By this time next year you’ll have surpassed your father and the jounin in this village little one. I knew you were the perfect pupil for me.”

Your pride had soared at his words, you were the product of his teachings, the fruit of his wisdom and you were proud of that. You and him had grown close so much so that it was difficult to not feel real love and affection towards him. He was the grandfather you had never had. 

Aside from your conflicting feelings regarding your sensei you had also made almost unbelievable progress in your medical ninjutsu. Your chakra control had always been superb but now you were leading surgeries with Shizune and working part time at the hospital as a nurse practitioner. Tsunade was extremely proud of your rapid growth though murmurs of you being a prodigy on par with Uchiha Itachi were beginning to rise and you honestly had no idea how you felt about that. 

Tsunade knew you were training in other fields than iryo ninjutsu but she believed you were teaching yourself. You couldn’t tell her you were in ROOT, much less that you were Danzo’s pupil, she would kill you, then Danzo and then you again. 

It was crazy to know that a year had already gone by, your fifth birthday would be happening in about a month and Sensei said that he had a very good present for you. With that promise in mind you went back to your routine of living a lie. 

***

All of that had lead to today, you were observing a simple surgery with Shizune-senpai when Izumo and Kotetsu barged in shouting nonsense. You were able to make out very few words in their entire speech: Naruto...Lord Jiraiya...Tsunade-sama...Ayumi-chan.

Catching their drift you said a quick goodbye to Shizune and blushed when she hugged you and kissed your forehead. Both chunin cooed at the sight as you ran towards the hokage building. 

Not bothering to knock you ran into the room and threw yourself at your second mother, it was a game you both played. If she didn’t catch you she owed you an afternoon out, if she did catch you, you would help her get out of doing paperwork for a day. It was a great game to play because it benefited you both. Before she could catch you, a big hand grabbed the back of your shirt, effectively stopping the game. 

Confused and slightly upset you turned your head as much as you can to see who had ruined your afternoon out. A large man with white unruly hair was quirking an eyebrow at your small form. His eyes held mischief and amusement. Before you could sign some vulgar phrases at him a new voice broke the silence.

“Yah Ero-sennein, don’t tell me your perving on little kids now!?”

Your blood ran cold at that voice, like hell you were gonna let yourself be pimped out. You produced a chakra thread and let it attach to one of the many kunai the man carried with him. With a quick twitch of your forefinger the kunai swiftly sliced at the arm holding you, causing you to fall towards the ground. 

“Hey! You brat don’t try to hurt Ero-sennin!”

The voice came from a blonde teen, the jinchuriki of the kyuubi. When your eyes locked your entire world shifted.

***

When your eyes opened again you no longer were in the Hokage’s office but in a sewer. Instead of being completely dark the sewer had a yellow hue, the murky water completely submerging your laying body. 

Before you could move to stand, you felt it. Chakra. It made the air in the sewer thick and paralyzed your entire body. This chakra was like no other you had felt before, it wasn’t cool and fresh, it wasn’t warm and fuzzy, it wasn’t even neutral like other small children’s. This chakra felt overbearing, like every breath was a mix of smoke and chlorine. It oozed anger and pain, the being it belonged to clearly in some sort of dire situation. 

You managed to lift yourself up from the water and began to walk in the direction of the current. As you walked further into the sewer the chakra became more irritated, like whoever it belonged to knew you were approaching and was warning you to turn back. Ignoring it you continue down the sewer moving faster with every step. 

You were sprinting as fast as your short legs would allow before you knew it, water was splashing loudly around you. You ran until the chakra was right in front of you, so thick and pungent you could almost taste it. 

A giant gate stood before you, behind it glowing red eyes locked with yours. Quickly bringing your hands up you signed. 

“Who are you?”

**“Get the fuck out of here you pest. Don’t think this gate will stop me from killing you.”**

“Why are you here?” 

**“Why the fuck does that matter to you?”**

“Where are you hurt?” 

**“Excuse me? Who the fuck do you think you are to ask me such a stupid question?”**

“When was the last time you were free from your prison?”

**“..what?”**

“Tell me, what is your name?”

**“You vile humans call me Kyubbi.”**

“But that isn’t your name. What is your name?”

**“Why does my name matter to you? All you human’s care for is your countries well being even at the cost of your humanity.”**

Hearing his response you quietly walked past the bars separating the two of you. Immediately the fox was pinning you to the floor with his massive paw, rage and confusion clearly evident on his face. Before he could speak again you signed to him. 

“I know humans have not been kind to you or your siblings, I know all you’ve ever wanted was to find kindness and acceptance like the sage gave you. I can’t promise you that one day you’ll be free but I can promise you that I’ll do everything in my power to keep you and your siblings safe!”

**“What could a weak insect like you do to defend me? You would die a senseless death.”**

“Weakness isn’t an excuse, it’s a choice. I can choose to take your words and give up but in doing so I would risk the lives of people I hold very dear.”

The paw pinning you slowly lifted, allowing you to stand again. A fire burned inside of you, even if it cost you your life, you would protect your family.

“Loneliness can be painful, but all it takes is one person to love you to change that. Harboring hatred and seeking revenge will never satisfy you, instead use that hatred to motivate you to be better than before.”

You slowly stretched out your hand to softly lay on the fox’s fur. He bristled and opened his mouth to yell but you beat him to it. 

“The sage of six paths gave you a name, us humans took it away from you. I’m trying to give it back, Kurama.” 

At the mention of his name the fox stilled, eyes blown wide in an almost comical fashion. Before you could ask him what was wrong the world shifted once more. 

***

“Ayumi-chan! How are you feeling? Are you lightheaded or dizzy at all?”

Standing above you was Tsunade-sama, a green glowing hand pressed against your forehead. You blinked many times, eyes adjusting to the well lit room slowly. You were still in the hokage’s office, Jiraiya, Naruto, Sakura and Tsunade were all still there. Shaking your head you sat up. 

“I’m fine, sorry to worry you. These are Jiraiya-sama and Naurto-san?”

Tsunade carefully picked you up and settled you on her hip, turning the both of you towards the other three shinobi in the office. Naruto was openly gaping at you in Tsunade’s arms, Jiraiya was smirking and Sakura look just about done with everything. Before the three could make any remarks on your position Tsunade spoke.

“Yes, the blonde is Uzumaki Naruto and the stupid looking, white haired man next to him is Jiraiya. Naruto, Jiraiya this my youngest daughter, Ayumi-chan.”

You were surprised at your introduction as the daughter of the hokage. Looking passed your shock you joyfully smiled at both men and Sakura.

“Hello, my name is Nara Ayumi. It’s a pleasure to meet you both. Hi Sakura-san! It’s been some time since I last saw you!”

Naruto was now making confused sounds and gesturing between both you, Tsunade and Sakura. 

“Close your mouth brat! Now, before my adorable little lady fainted we were talking about Naruto and Sakura’s progress. In order to determine the level at which you both are fighting you both will engage in battle with one of the best shinobi this village has to offer.”

As if on cue the door to the hokage’s office opened and in walked someone you held in the highest regard, one of the most splendid shinobi this village had to offer indeed. 

“Yah! Shikamaru became one of the best ninjas in the village while I was gone? How?! He would rather watch clouds than train!” 

At the blonde’s outburst you couldn’t help but smile and nudge for Tsunade to place you on your feet. Once standing you ran towards your brother, vaguely aware that there was someone else behind him. 

Once close enough you launched yourself at Shikamaru, squealing when he caught you and held you close. Now that his entire genin team had become chunin, he had been tasked with leading many missions and was rarely at home. As you snuggled in the crook of his neck you were able to get a clear view of who was behind him. 

The kunoichi was from the sand, she had blonde hair tied up into four pigtails and wore a black dress. A battle fan maybe twice your size was strapped onto her back and she held a gleeful glint in her eye. Sabaku no Temari, your brother’s future wife, was gorgeous. 

“Imouto what are you doing here? Dad said you were spending the day with Shizune-san, Hokage-sama I’m sorry if Ayumi-chan was a disturbance today. I’ll be making sure she’s disciplined accordingly.”

At your brother’s words your face morphed from that of love to scandalized. You pushed yourself back so you could be face to face with your brother.

“Disturbance? I’m a pleasure to be around but I guess you wouldn’t know that since you’re never home you jackass! Put me down!”

Wiggling and pushing away from your brother, he had no real choice but to let you down. Once standing you turned away from him and willed your hurt feelings to not show. Booming laughter helped move the attention away from you. 

“Bwahahaha, oh she has some sass to her! This’ll sure make things interesting.”

Jiraiya was wiping away tears of laughter at your response to your brother’s words. You sent him a scowl and he quickly quieted down. 

“Ah well, Hokage-sama the delegation from Suna is leaving tomorrow morning and she just wanted to thank you in person.”

The suna kunoichi walked out from behind Shikamaru and bowed deeply. After sharing a few more words you hadn’t bothered to listen to, your brother left but not before trying to make you smile. You ignored him completely, still deeply hurt by his comment. 

“Well, now my plan has changed. Kakashi get in here now!”

Instantly Hatake Kakashi body flickered into the office, his favorite book held open in his hand. 

“Hey, hey Kakashi-sensei I got you something. It’s the first issue in years, I read some of it but it was really boring but I know you really like this crap.”

Naruto held a book out to Kakashi but before the copy nin could grab it Tsunade did. She gave it a look of distaste and turned to Jiraiya.

“Really idiot? Even after all these years you still write this tasteless smut? Well at least this makes my job easier.”

Book in hand Tsunade made her way towards you, gently ushering you near the window. Crouching down she put up a silencing seal so no one else in the room would hear what she said to you. 

“Alright squirt here’s the deal. Jiraiya is mainly going to be training you in evasion and escape, however to do this he needs to know your current skill level. So, your job is going to be to deliver this book to your father. He’s currently out with friends at the Akimichi restaurant your family frequents. I’m going to order that team 7 capture you at all costs. They can use ninjutsu, genjutsu and taijutsu so long as they don’t hurt you too badly. They can also ask other shinobi to help in capturing you. If you complete this task then I will take you on as an apprentice and teach you everything I know about the art of healing.”

Baffled at the nonsense spewing from this woman’s lips you allowed the book to be pushed into your grasp. Tsunade must have been pretty drunk if she thought you stood a chance at completing your task. 

Sensing your lack of confidence Tsunade lightly flicked your forehead and gave you a gentle smile.

“You’re stronger than you let on Ayumi-chan, that is something I’m sure of. Use this experience to learn. If you feel an asthma attack starting, guide your chakra to your lungs to sooth it, if your heart starts hurting more than average then guide your chakra there. If it becomes too much then stop the mission and have Sakura treat you, okay? I’ll be at the restaurant informing your father of this little mission and Jiraiya will be following you from a distance to gage your skill.”

Standing up Tsunade lifted the silencing seal and turned towards the four shinobi in room. Without looking at you she crossed her arms and told you to go. 

Not wasting a second you ran as fast as you could out the door and into the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Shikaku is still being kinda an asshole, sorry if you don't like that.
> 
> A lot of Ayumi's mannerisms are reflective of her memories as Natasha Romanoff, a soviet trained assassin but please keep in mind that she's still a child. Natasha's body and mind were trained to withstand and ignore emotion in general, she was trained to complete her missions no matter the cost. Ayumi may still remember that mindset but her body and mind are no longer accustomed to it. She has all of the intelligence and acquired knowledge from her first life but she doesn't have the proper priming to put it to good use.  
> I just wanted to clear this up because I know some of you will question why Ayumi is so affected by Shikaku's attitude towards her. Hopefully this clears it up a bit.
> 
> Leave a comment of what you liked or didn't, what you would like to see within this story or just whatever in general! Next update within 5-6 days!


	7. 너 나를 떠난 뒤로 내겐 없던 힘이 생겼어 (Since you Left me, I have Power)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ayumi finally explodes.

Shikaku’s youngest ran out of the Hokage’s office with speed Kakashi hadn’t known she possessed. In her arms was his gift from Naruto, the first copy of the newest Icha Icha book. Kakashi’s heart broke at the sight, he would have to wait until this meeting was over to read the book. 

Taking in Kakashi’s mournful face and the three faces of shock Tsunade placed her hands on her hips and smiled. Immediately all four shinobi burst into shouts. 

“Hey baa-chan! How could you just give away Kakashi-sensei’s gift like that?”

“Shishou, that material is not suitable for a child!”

“Yah hime, I would have made another copy if you had told me she was such a big fan.”

“Hokage-sama please say what you need to say so I can go track down the kid and get my book back.” 

Hearing something she liked, the woman hokage simply sat down and clapped her hands once to cease the commotion. She smiled wider as she explained the new plan.

“Well, I was going to have Naruto and Sakura team up against you Kakashi but I’ve changed my mind. As we speak, Nara Ayumi is running across the village to show her father the gift Kakashi-san has given her. You three must do everything in your power to stop her. You can use ninjutsu, genjutsu and taijutsu so long as you don’t cause her too much bodily harm. You may also enlist the help of any shinobi or shinobi teams within the village to aid you in her capture. Should you fail to capture her, Naruto and Sakura, you two will be made academy students again. Kakashi, you will be made an academy instructor and also will have to deal with the Shikaku’s wrath at gifting his daughter such filth. Understood?”

Team 7 stood frozen in their spots, Naruto and Sakura baffled at the thought of being demoted to academy student. Kakashi was frozen in fear. Not only was his freedom as a jounin on the line but he could be faced with an angry Shikaku. There weren’t many people who could truly scare Kakashi but Nara Shikaku and Ensui were two of them. Jiraiya couldn’t help but feel pity for the young girl, she stood no chance against three determined shinobi, much less if one of them was Kakashi. 

With the three shinobi scared straight they gave their confirmation and body flickered to the roof. 

“Kakashi-sensei do you think Baa-chan meant what she said? Would she really take you off the jounin rosters and make you an academy teacher?”

Naruto and Sakura were giving each other worried stares, their sensei hadn’t said anything since asking for his book and now looked ready to kill someone. 

“It doesn’t matter if she meant it or not. If Ayumi-chan manages to give her father that book then I’m as good as dead. For that reason we cannot fail. As your commanding officer I’m ordering you to take this very seriously, if we see any other shinobi then we tell them that they must help us on Hokage’s orders. Understood?”

At the solid ‘understood’ from both teens team 7 set out to track and capture Nara Ayumi. 

***

Deciding to take the crowded streets of Konoha rather than the rooftops or alleyways, you ran as fast as your legs allowed you to. You could sense Jiraiya’s chakra following you from a distance and slowed for a bit. In order to escape at least two chunin level and one jounin level shinobi you were going to have to be smart. 

_Hatake Kakashi, known throughout the elemental nations as Kakashi of the Sharingan, Hurano Sakura, Tsunade’s cherished apprentice and Uzumaki Naruto, apprentice to Jiraiya and the nine tails jinchuriki...how the fuck am I gonna win this thing?_

You didn’t have much time to think of a plan because suddenly three chakra signatures were closing in on you, muttering curses you took off again. A feeling of nostalgia hit you like a truck at the feeling of being pursued, the last time you had felt such an adrenaline rush had been back in Budapest with Barton.

You were brought off your daydream by three shuriken almost catching your arm. Kakashi-sensei dropped down in front of you, Sakura-san to your left and Naruto-san to your right. To bystanders it seemed like a standard shinobi made arrest, but the few shinobi there looked on with genuine curiosity.

“Ayumi-chan, by order of the Hokage we cannot let you deliver that package. Please hand it over now or prepare to take on team 7.”

If your heart wasn’t about to beat out of your chest then you would have been rolling on the floor in laughter, leave it to Kakashi to be this serious about a stupid book. Just as you were running out of ideas another familiar chakra signature came within range. They were headed straight for you, all you had to do was wait for the perfect time. As Kakashi-sensei lunged for you a booming voice cried out. 

“My eternal rival! How beautiful it is to see you out bonding with your genin team! Oh is that Ayumi-chan, my dearest little flower, how have you been?!”

Gai-sensei was running towards you all at scary speeds and you used Kakashi-sensei’s innate flight or fight response to Gai to make your get away. 

_Oh fuck yeah. Thank you Gai, for having impeccable timing. Tiger, Boar, Ox, Dog, Snake._

When you opened your eyes you no longer were in the middle of a shinobi bukake but on Gai-sensei’s wide back. The sound of a flak jacket hitting the ground had you blinking away your surprise you whispered a simple ‘Thank you’ to Gai and booked it in the direction of the Akimichi restaurant.

You weren’t able to make it more than 2 miles before 7 chakra signatures were closing in rapidly. Your heart was beating erratically and your lungs burned but you kept your pace at a steady sprint, your chakra was flowing directly into your legs, heart and lungs. Thinking of multiple ways to escape the 7 shinobi you didn’t notice when you ran into someone.

“Hey! Watch where you- oh. Shikamaru, your kid sister is here.”

Looking up you were met with turquoise eyes and sandy hair. Behind her stood your brother and his whole genin team. The three chunin were giving you quizzical looks while Asuma’s gaze held something akin to mirth. Standing you immediately made clear to Temari that you were sorry and bowed deeply, completely ignoring the other four shinobi. Just as you were about to leave your brother snatched your right arm and gave you a hard glare.

“Oi, what’s gotten into you? You don’t even stop to say hello to Ino or Choji or Asuma. Parent’s haven’t raised you to be a disrespectful brat, so stop and say hello.”

You had never heard your brother sound so angry before, he didn’t raise his voice above a whisper but it still was laced with venom. You pulled your arm roughly in an attempt to make him let go but his grip only tightened. Deciding to play the role of a helpless child you let out a low whine of pain, it wasn’t hard to be tricked- your brother’s vice grip on you would definitely leave a nasty bruise. Before you could continue your charade Ino spoke up.

“Seven shinobi are heading this way, it feels like team 3 and team 7 along with Kakashi-sensei’s pack. They’re approaching quickly, like they're tracking someone...Ayumi-chan do you know what’s going on?”

Your body tensed at the mention of Kakashi’s pack. You could not believe he had gone to such measures to capture you. You struggled again, this time harder. If you did not move now then you would fail your first mission. Your brother took your increased struggle as a sign of guilt and- using force one should never use on a child- yanked your arm closer to his body. 

A muffled pop came from your shoulder, the chakra flowing through your body drowned out a majority of the sound but you still felt it. A dislocated shoulder caused by your older brother hurt more than any dislocated shoulder you had received before. Immediately, healing chakra rushed to your shoulder and began to mend as much of the tissue it could but it couldn’t heal it completely. You would need to pop your shoulder back into its socket before you could regain full use of your arm. You wanted to cry in pain and betrayal, you wanted to smack your brother until he understood your hurt but at the moment a pack of dogs could be heard coming up the street. 

Not wasting another second chakra strings flew from your left fore and middle finger and attached themselves onto one of Shikamaru’s kunais and one of Asuma’s chakra blades. You performed the same maneuver you had with Jiraiya and produced the same result. Half a second later you were sprinting through fruit stalls and ducking underneith supply wagons. 

Maybe it was the adrenaline, or maybe chakra really was all that great but you couldn’t feel pain coming from your shoulder. You were vaguely aware that 5 more chakra signatures had joined the chase, presumably team 10 plus Temari, and pushed yourself harder. 

Behind you chakra was flaring, multiple weapons had nicked your body, the ground seemed to be crumbling beneath you, you saw Naruto everywhere and multiple gusts of wind almost toppled you but still you ran. 

Your chakra was draining quickly, mostly used to keep any asthma and heart attack at bay. You turned down what you believed was an alleyway which cut through the last block of the village. If you could just make it through here then you were home free. As you neared the end of the alleyway, it became clear that you had been wrong in your sense of direction. There was no opening where the alley ended, only large dumpsters and a disgusting, tall concrete wall- much too tall for you to climb over in time. 

Growling echoed in the narrow alleyway and you pressed your back flat against the wall. Team 7 along with team 10 stood in front of you, team 3 taking both roof of the buildings on either side of you. Really it was a pitiful sight. 

You inhaled deeply and felt your chakra funnel into your throat, dead ahead of you were team 7 and team 10. The alley was narrow enough to make your suiton: Mizurappa effective. Having had years of practice, you no longer needed hand seals to transform your chakra into water. 

Just as the group of shinobi were about to pounce, you shifted your stance and brought your free hand up to your chin. Not saying a word, you inhaled and then a massive wave of water was leaving you and catching the teams by surprise. You kept your input of chakra at a consistent high rate, resulting in the mizurappa being massive and borderline deadly. 

One finished you were exhausted, your right arm hung at your side, if you really needed to use it then you would but it could lead to nerve damage. Your left arm hugged the book to your chest. Just as you were about to yield a delicious smell wafted up your nostrils. It was strong and coming from just over the wall, your destination was closer than you had originally thought!

Still the problem of somehow getting over the wall before all 12 shinobi could catch you had no solution, until you heard a soft meow. Looking down to your right was a small brown cat with a red bow on its ear. 

_Tora you goddamn angel, if you’re here then that means someone has to be looking for you._

Sure enough the scolding voice of Ebisu-sensei could be heard just on the other side of the wall. Relief filled your body as you listened to Konohamaru scale the wall and peer down onto the scene. Flicking through the hand seals using one hand was much easier than you had believed it to be because one moment you were in the disgusting alley and the next you were atop the wall, Konohamaru in your previous spot. 

You smiled at your small victory but hadn’t accounted for one of Kakashi-sensei’s dogs to jump at you, almost biting your face. You threw yourself back to avoid the bite but couldn’t reach the wall after to slow your fall. Shouts and figures moving held your focus for about half a second before instinct took over. Plummeting headfirst into the ground sounded like a really bad idea so you threw your arms out in hopes of softening the blow to your head. 

When you landed your weight had shifted mostly towards your right side, both your dislocated arm and right side of your head gave a loud crunch. Pain flooded your system but the restaurant was just across the street, you could make it if you ran. Ignoring the liquid rolling down your temple and refusing to look at your right arm you dashed towards the restaurant doors, the book still firmly held in your left hand. You couldn’t hear anything but you could feel the ground and air vibrating with chakra, your hunters were closer than before. 

Sticking the spine of the book in your mouth you held your left arm out, ready to push open the doors when Kakashi of the Sharingan body flickered in front of you. In that moment you did the only thing you could think of- pulling your arm back and fisting your hand, you willed as much of your chakra as you could into your fist. Throwing the punch with as much force as you could you waited until the last moment before making contact to release all of the accumulated chakra. Tsunade had helped you perfect your release of chakra and you were a master at it. 

This resulted in Kakashi of the Sharingan flying through the wooden door, only to become embedded in the back wall of the restaurant. Your body worked on autopilot and scoured the customers for your father and uncles. Once found you willed your left hand up to your mouth and grasped the book in your wavering hold. Your legs wobbled as you made your way towards your father, not noticing the shared looks of worry he and his friends were wearing. 

Standing directly in front of him you relayed your message to him. Immediately he wrapped you in his arms and cuddled you. Taking this moment to bask in your father’s warmth you failed to notice Tsunade calling out to you. How long had it been since your father had held you, since he acknowledged you? Your father nudging you was what brought you out of your daze. Tsunade was kneeling before you, looking at you with a mix of concern and pride. 

“Shishou! I did it, oh you should have seen the size of the mizurappa I managed to make without hand seals! Oh shit, Kakashi-nii is probably going to need to go to the hospital. Also can you pop my shoulder back into its socket, I can take care of the rest.”

Your father’s arms tightened around your body at your words, Tsunade’s eyebrows shot up before she was bent over laughing loudly. Maneuvering your body to lay against your father’s chest, she rotated your shoulder until you assured her that it was in the right position. The pop echoed within the now quiet restaurant and you sighed deeply before your chakra was rushing into your now sore shoulder. You brought a glowing green hand to your head and hummed in joy when you didn’t have brain damage. 

You were brought out of your daze when you heard Kakashi groan and begin to move. Standing up quickly, you rushed towards your eccentric uncle and began running a diagnostic jutsu. Repairing his multiple broken ribs and ridding his lungs of water you deemed him healthy enough to not need a hospital, telling him to keep his activity light for the next few days. 

Your shishou patted you on your back and guided you back to the group. 

“Alright, alright now listen up! This entire chase was a test for both team 7 and Ayumi-chan, neither party should be held responsible for any damages caused during the test. Akimichi-san, rest assured I will personally pay for the damages to your restaurant. Team 7 and Ayumi-chan, your test is not over yet. In two hours, a 2v1 spar with commence between Sakura and Naruto and Ayumi at training ground 13. Everyone in the village is invited to watch the fruit of their years of training in this spar.”

Turning to you, she hugged you tightly and wished you good luck before walking out of the restaurant. You were practically vibrating with excitement at the idea of a public spare, finally you would be able to show off the work you and Danzo-sensei and shishou had done. 

Catching your father’s furrowed eyebrows and calculated gaze, your mood plummeted. Just a second ago he was cuddling you and now he looked like he did the rest of the time, emotionless. What had changed? Why had he changed so drastically with you?

Swallowing thickly, you timidly shuffled closer to him. Keeping your head bowed and your hands clasped together in front of you, you spoke to him in a polite small voice.

“Father, will you come see my spar?”

It was quiet as you waited with bated breath for his answer.

“Yes.”

Your head flew up and you looked at your father with genuine surprise. He had stopped putting effort into your training a long while ago, this would be the first time he would witness your progress. You smiled widely and nodded, giddy with excitement. 

Turning around you flung yourself at Gai, who caught you and profusely apologized for assuming you were a criminal. You laughed and told him that you would only forgive him if he bought you lunch. Spinning you around and crying tears of joy, Gai all but flew out of the restaurant with you in his arms, his now chunin team were quick to follow.

***

Two hours later, you were tying the last few bandages onto your thigh and making sure you were fully stretched for your upcoming spar. The surrounding area of training ground 13 was filled to the brim with shinobi. Your father was standing with his two best friends, Asuma, Gai, Genma and Raidō were sitting on a thick tree branch overlooking the entire training grounds. Teams 3, 7,8 and 10 along with Temari were sitting around waiting for it all to start. 

Kakashi was on the other side of the training ground with his two students, probably reminding them of the three basic skills of a shinobi. You kept stealing glances of your father, he was currently laughing with his two friends, you wished he would give you some sort of advice or good luck but still, the fact that he was here made you happy.

What you did not expect was for Ensui to shunshin in front of you. You jumped and let out a pathetic shriek before being engulfed in a bone crushing hug.   
“Oh Ayumi-chan, I knew this day would come! Look at you, about to face off against shinobi thirteen years older than you. Listen here, it doesn’t matter whether you win or lose. What matters is that you have fun, regardless of the outcome I’ll always be proud of you.” 

Your eyesight blurred as tears threatened to spill over onto your cheeks. When was the last time someone had said they were proud of you? You nodded your head and blushed when you felt the tears run down your face. Your uncle simply wiped them away and hugged you tightly. You held onto him and cried a bit into his chest before speaking in a small voice.

“What happened ojisan? Why doesn’t he love me anymore?”

“He does love you sweetheart, I promise you he does. He’s honestly just being very stupid and has been for a long while. You’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.”

You cried a bit more and relished the feeling of being held by your uncle before forcing yourself to calm down. Tsunade was already on the scene with Jiraiya though she seemed to have known you needed a minute to calm down so she continued to converse with her friend. Hastily wiping your eyes and nose on your uncles shirt and giggling when he made fake gagging noises, you smiled at your uncle. 

His face hadn’t aged at all since your first meeting. His eyes were lined with thick green eyeliner that made his glares deadly and yet he had only ever looked at you with love. 

“Thank you ojisan, for loving me.”

“I’m your ojisan, Ayumi-chan. It’s my job to love and spoil you any chance I get. Now kick some chunin ass for me.”

He kissed you on your forehead before casually making his way closer to Kakashi, delivering a subtle smack to his ass before joining Asuma and Gai. You blushed at his bold actions towards Kakashi-nii but figured they both needed an effective way to relieve stress. You caught your shishou’s gaze and nodded towards her, you were ready to prove yourself. 

Tsunade moved towards the middle of the training ground and gestured for both parties to do the same. 

“Alright listen up, Nara Ayumi will be facing off against Haruno Sakura and Uzumaki Naruto. The purpose of this match is to gage the progress of their training. Naruto trained under Jiraiya for four years while Sakura and Ayumi trained under me for four and two years respectively. Winner will be determined by either knock out or tapping out. All ninjutsu, taijutsu and genjutsu are fair game. Ready? Begin!”

And with that you jumped back, away from Sakura’s fists and performed the mizurappa, effectively throwing your opponents back. You had a very clear picture of how Sakura would fight, she would imitate Tsunade as best as she could. Having already fought your shishou on multiple occasions, you found yourself at ease with Sakura. 

Naruto was a bit more complicated. While you had seen plenty of his future fights and moves you hadn’t seen him fight in person. You could make out the general pattern to his sloppy fighting style but he really seemed like a loose cannon.

As Sakura kept trying to hit you with her taijutsu, Naruto was busy making shadow clones and rasengans. You made sure to keep him in your field of vision, countering Sakura’s taijutsu with your own. 

Noticing Naruto approaching quickly with a rasengan, you narrowly dodged a kick from Sakura and made sure to grab a hold onto her leg. Swinging her towards Naruto, forcing him to either dissipate the jutsu or hit Sakura with it.

You continued to demonstrate your prowess in taijutsu, dodging and delivering punches and kicks until you looked back. Your father was talking to some other shinobi, not watching you. Your heart hurt at the thought that he found your match boring so you decided to demonstrate your ninjutsu. 

Using ninja wire to pin Naruto to a tree, you lured Sakura into the far end of the training ground, right under a thick branch. Just as she was pulling her hand back to deliver a punch you jumped into the air and formed the snake hand seal. 

Lightning spewed from your mouth in the shape of a spear, forcing Sakura to dodge mid punch. Ration: Gian, was a highly destructive lightning ninjutsu Danzo-sensei had taught you. If you had enough control you could shape the lightning to form a laser beam of sorts to chase off attackers. And that’s exactly what you did.   
Dropping back onto solid ground you used your lightning to chase Sakura away from you and even managed to pierce her through her shoulder. When she cried out, Nartuo yelled.

“Sakura-chan! Alright, let’s see how you fare against this!”

And suddenly there were at least one hundred Naruto’s surrounding you. 

_Well, this isn’t good. Alright sorry Sasuke, I’m about to plagiarize your signature jutsu._

You dodged the first few clones but quickly became overwhelmed. Willing your hands to form the three hand seals to form Chidori, you quickly pierced through multiple clones, once you felt comfortable releasing such a large amount of chakra you expanded your chidori to all directions. The bigger it expanded the more clones would poof away. 

“What? What even is that jutsu?”

_Oh ho, now, should I be a total dick and rename it something different or should I keep it the same?_

Grinning you willed your chakra to weave into every clone within a five meter radius of you, effectively wiping out all but seven clones. You turned to Naruto and Sakura, both were gaping at you but relatively unharmed aside from Sakura’s shoulder. 

“You like it? I call Chidori Nagashi, it’s parent jutsu is the Chidori. Maybe you’ve heard of it?”

Both chunin glared at you at the mention of their rogue teammate. 

_Oh how nice, Sasuke is their weak spot._

Using their anger as motivation you henged into their teammate, open shirt, katana and all. The reaction was instant. Naruto was turning red with fury while Sakura was turning red for an entirely different reason.

“Are you hurt, scaredy cat?”

That was all it took for Naruto to attack you with everything he had. It was easy to keep him at bay, fighting motivated by anger was the sloppiest but once he started using his weapons, that was when things got interesting. 

Naruto’s fighting style had always been erratic and sloppy, as far as you could tell and that made the spar easy. Once you added in two kunai and multiple shuriken, it became less than easy but still you managed, even with the Sasuke henge.

You had to remember to get Danzo-sensei a gift basket because his training paid off. You were able to keep up with Naruto’s erratic slashes and gabs, managing to cut a few vital pressure points and ligaments. 

As you were just about to knock him out a fist connected with your chest. All of the air left your lungs and your ribs curved painfully before you hit three trees and fell. You were left gasping and groaning as you willed your chakra to heal your ribs. Looking up you swore as you saw Sakura’s form charging at you with speeds akin to Lee. 

Knowing you wouldn’t have time to dodge, you dropped your henge and fortified your body with your chakra. Raising your hands into open palms and letting them glow a deep blue. 

Chakra scalpels weren’t ideal for fighting but this was your last resort. You had just enough chakra to perform one more ninjutsu but hopefully you could end it with your iryo ninjutsu. 

_Focus on her movements, she relies heavily on her arms and legs. Odds are she doesn’t know any other ninjutsu._

Seeing your chakra scalpels Sakura also changed her attack. Her palms glowed blue and like that the two of you began to fight using chakra scalpels. 

In a way, it looked almost like two Hyuga’s were fighting. All attacks were open handed with the occasional kick or flip. You were so caught up in not getting touched by her scalpels that you completely forgot about Naruto. 

A full rasengan to your back had you screaming and reaching around to claw at the perpetrator. Both shinobi jumped away from your floppy attack and gave you precious time to recuperate. 

You tried to move but the pain in your back flared horribly, limiting what you could do. Behind you, you could hear the hushed whispers of many and felt shame rise within you. This was your opportunity to prove to your father that you were worthy of his attention and yet you had lost. Your confidence was being broken into small pieces and you weren’t sure you could salvage what was left. 

Then you smelled it. Burning flesh. It was pungent and close, most likely from your back. That sickening smell brought back memories of your youth in your old life, your life back in the Red Room. How the Madame would brand your skin everytime you didn’t meet a goal. How they would use a hot needle to sear open a wound as punishment. 

Your heart was racing as your mind shifted your reality. You no longer were in training ground 13, you were in Soviet Russia, in a secret facility disguised as a girls home. You weren’t sparring against two shinobi, you were fighting to the death against another black widow in training. You were going to die, whether it be by the hands of your opponent or by a gunshot to the head for losing the spar. 

With that in mind, you willed yourself to ignore the pain across your back. You stood proud and strong as you turned to face your opponent once again. The Madame was in the middle of declaring your opponent the winner when she caught sight of your standing form. 

Excusing herself for misspeaking, the Madame allowed the spar to continue. And this time you didn’t hold back. You were going to live. 

***  
Jiraiya had been thoroughly impressed by the young girl’s skill. She started the match with a powerful water jutsu and then showed off her impressive taijutsu. When it became obvious she was getting bored she switched back to ninjutsu, where she tore through Sakura with a beam of lightning. So far both jutsus she had used had been at least B rank, significantly higher than most chunin. 

Jiraiya was again blown away when the small girl effectively used chidori, a jutsu Kakashi had created. He was left speechless when she used the chidori and expanded it to disperse the hundreds of shadow clones Naruto had hurled at her. Ayumi even began taunting the two chunin with their old teammate, henging into an older version of the Uchiha. A heartless but effective move on her end. 

The small Nara had already proven herself to be a prodigy, surpassing Orochimaru, Kakashi and maybe even Uchiha Itachi and yet she was still giving it her all. Perhaps that’s why he cringed so hard when she finally was hit with a full rasengan by Naruto. The girl had let out a heart wrenching scream before falling to the ground where she didn’t move for a solid minute. 

Tsunade was already announcing the two chunin as the victors when the girl had shakily stood, causing Tsunade to stop and take back her words. Naruto and Sakura asked the girl to yield, she was already injured and they didn’t wish to cause her more harm. Instead of answering then the Nara simply took out two kunai and muttered something underneath her breath before charging. 

This time was different. Before, she was careful to not slash or stab too deeply but now she was acting like a completely different person. Gone were the taunts and her confident exterior, replacing it was a blank face and silence. Tsunade tensed, it was small and almost unnoticeable but Jiraiya had known her long enough to know she had become worried by the turn of events. 

Curious, he watched on. The following few minutes were brutal, any attack the two chunin tried to start was quickly thwarted by Ayumi. She slashed them where she knew would hurt and made sure to make it difficult to escape her kunais. Nara Ayumi was dominating the match, it seemed she wasn’t fazed by the still smoking skin across her back as she continued her onslaught. 

It only came to an end when she severed both of the chunin’s Achilles heels. The crowd of shinobi all winced and cringed at the act, it was one of the most painful non life threatening injuries a shinobi could sustain. The crowd quieted when Ayumi spoke.

“Yield.”

This spurred a big reaction from the two downed shinobi.

“Are you crazy, we can still take you! You’re nothing, you hear me? Nothing!”

“Yeah Sakura-chan is right. You’re just a kid, you can’t kill us.”

The girl gave no outward response except for putting away her blades.

“Your arrogance is your weakness Sakura. Naruto, you follow your friend blindly because you are in love with her, that is your weakness. They will get you killed.”

_Oh ho this kid’s got some pretty good one liners._

“A shinobi’s pride is not a weakness, you’re simply evil and brutal! What kind of monster are you?”

Again the young girl did not react to the harsh words of the pink haired shinobi. Instead she turned and walked about two meters before turning to face them again. 

“For the first time in my life I am beginning to realize that it is not evil and brutality, but nearly always weakness, that is to blame for the worst things that happen in this world. I will ask you one last time. Yield. Don’t let your weakness be your downfall.”

“You little bitch, once I finish healing I’ll prove to you that my pride is not a weakness!”

Oh Sakura was angry, so much so that she was turning red in the face. Meanwhile Ayumi simply formed the tiger hand seal and uttered a quiet Kokuangyo no Jutsu. Sakura stopped shouting profanities and stilled, her face morphed from anger to fear. Naruto was much the same, stopping any movement and turning a fearful expression towards Ayumi. 

Said girl simply smiled before her hands glowed green and flashing to the two immobile shinobi. Multiple people began to shout at her and even dashed forward to stop her from harming them anymore than they already were but they were too slow. 

Tsunade was screaming at her youngest apprentice to stop and rushing forward when the girl flew through hand seals and jabbed both shinobi with her fingers.   
“Ninpō Himitsu Nara Gijutsu: Chō Kaifuku Jutsu!”

Immediately both Sakura and Naruto were engulfed in a sphere of bright green medical chakra. Everyone stopped moving, the light from the chakra was beautiful and warm. Tsunade and Jiraiya drew closer to the two unconscious shinobi and noticed that the majority of their wounds were gone and the ones still there were quickly healing. It was astounding, Jiraiya had never seen or heard of such a technique.

“Gaki, where did you learn this technique?”

_Ah so even Tsunade is flabbergasted by this. Well, well, well, it seems we really do have a prodigy. She’s created two new jutsus and shes only four? Fucking hell, Shikaku really does have killer genes._

“I created it shishou. It takes minimal amounts of chakra to perform and is highly effective in a short amount of time.”

Silence followed, as more shinobi came to study the seemingly indestructible bubbles surrounding the two chunin. Ayumi simply stayed off to the side, not saying a word. Praises and questions in regards to the mechanics of the jutsu sprang up and quickly the match became a gossip circle. Almost all of the shinobi were curious about the two new jutsus they had seen but when they turned to ask the creator, she was gone. 

_Well I’ll be damned, she wants to save the world huh? At this rate she damn well just might._

***

You were quick to follow your father when you saw him start to walk away from your match. You trailed after him until you reached the start of the Nara forest, hesitating for a quick second before following again. You were trying to get his attention, you were finally fed up with his attitude towards you and you wanted answers. 

The only problem was, he was an expert at ignoring you. You tried everything, from calling his name to tugging on his flack jacket, to throwing sticks at him, and even trying to stab him with your kunai. Nothing worked. He simply would dodge your attempts and keep walking. 

Frustrated beyond belief you stopped following him and thought of the last possible thing you could do to get his attention. Lifting your kunai slightly and bringing it down into the meat of your thigh was horrible, it brought back memories from two years ago but it served its purpose. Your father stopped walking. Slowly yanking the kunai from your thigh, you decided to stab your shoulder this time. Doing it quick enough so your father had no time to stop you but also careful enough to not cause any long lasting nerve damage. At your actions your father finally spoke.

“Oi are you crazy? What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

Ignoring his questions you asked your own.

“Why do you hate me? What did I do to you that’s caused you to look at me with such anger all the time?”

“Don’t waste my time asking such stupid questions.”

Inhaling deeply you yanked the kunai out almost all of the way and slid it down from your shoulder to your hip, effectively cutting yourself.

“Did you not hear me? I said to stop doing that!”

“No! I won’t stop until you answer my question. Why did you change?”

“You’re batshit crazy if you think I’m about to have this stupid conversation with you.”

“Then I’ll keep on hurting myself, I won’t heal myself and I’ll let myself bleed out. You’d like that wouldn’t you?”

“Excuse me?”

“You’d love for me to die wouldn’t you Shikaku? It would make your life so much easier, you would be happier. Maybe I should just kill myself right now.”  
Shadows quickly extended from your father and tried to grab you but you were quick. You knew you were provoking him and that he would most likely react badly but you were left with no other choice. 

“Nara Ayumi, you will put down that kunai and heal yourself. That’s an order from your father.”

“You don’t have the right to call yourself my father. You’ve done nothing to deserve that title! For the last two years you’ve done nothing but make clear that you don’t want me. You choose to ignore me and only talk to me when you wish to reprimand me. Ever since that incident two years ago you’ve acted like I’m not your daughter. You see me as a burden, trash that lingers in your life. All I’m asking is why. What changed? Why don’t you love me anymore?”

“That’s not tr-”

“It is! Not once have you made an effort to be a part of my life within the last two years. You didn’t teach me shogi, Asuma did. You didn’t give me advice on what path I want to take when I’m older, Kakashi-nii did. You don’t comfort me when the townsfolk yell horrible things at me and threaten to kill me, shishou does. You don’t give me hugs or kisses or say you love me, Ensui ojisan does. Everyone knows you hate me, Shikaku! Everyone seems to know the reason too and yet no one tells me shit! I’m not stupid, I’m not a niave little girl you can just fool. I know what rejection feels like, and yet for some reason I never thought I would feel it from you. Why did you have me if you weren’t going to love me?”

Tears were freely flowing down your face as you released all of the pent up emotions you had been ignoring for years. Your father’s face was anguished, like he had eaten something rotten. It was the most emotion you had seen on his face in a long time. He tried to come closer to you but you backed away, you didn’t want his sympathy, you wanted answers. And yet he didn’t speak, he stayed silent while you hiccuped and sniffled. Taking his silence as confirmation to your question of whether he loved you or not, you cried harder. 

“You lied. You said.. You said you would always love me. You lied. Liar! Liar, liar, liar!”

“Sweetheart ple-”

“Shut up you fucking liar! I hate you! I wish you had aborted me, at least then I wouldn’t have to deal with your lies! You fucking liar, and everyone else who said you loved me...they’re all liars too. All of my friends, all of my family..they’re all fucking liars! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR!”

You weren’t sure how you had gotten to this point, you never broke down this hard, you were trained not to do so. And yet here you were, bloody, shaking and crying. The immense pain you had been harboring in your heart was unleashed and you let yourself get lost in its vast waves. 

“Little shadow, I need you to calm d-”

“Fuck you! Fuck you and all of your lies. Fuck you, fuck Yoshino, fuck Shikamaru, fuck Asuma, fuck Ensui, fuck everyone for lying to me! YOU’RE ALL FUCKING LIARS! LIARS, LIARS, LIARS!” 

By now you could feel the presence of at least seven different shinobi surrounding you and your father. Surely they had to have heard everything you were saying but they made no movement to stop you. 

Meanwhile your father was in tears, he was looking at you with such sadness in his eyes that your heart broke even more at the thought of you causing his sadness. Your stomach was churning painfully, you had never felt so nauseous before. You swallowed your sickness before speaking again.

“I trusted you Shikaku. I trusted everyone. And you, along with everyone else, lied to me...I hate you Shikaku. I hate you for bringing me into this world. I hate you for toying with my trust. I hate you for lying to me about loving me. I hate you.”

Your entire body was shaking violently and you felt like you were a few seconds away from passing out. You didn’t want to faint here, you wanted to be away from the liar kneeling in front of you. You couldn’t go to any of your uncles, they were liars too. Everyone you knew was a liar. 

Everyone except for one. 

Giving one last look to your father’s crying figure and to the group of friends and uncles surrounding you, you made the dragon hand seal and vanished.   
When your vision cleared you were no longer in the Nara forest but inside of a familiar dark building. Running towards your desired destination, you wasted no time on formalities and threw open the heavy wooden door. When the person sitting behind the desk looked up and noticed your broken appearance, he simply opened his arms and motioned for you to come. 

That was all it took for you to fling yourself onto Danzo-sensi’s lap and cry like the brokenhearted child you were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Laughs like Suicide Squad Joker* I live for angst but I don't know, this kinda feels a bit corny? I honestly probably need to find a beta reader or editor to help me cuz I feel like everything I write is shit.
> 
> From here on out most chapters will be 6000+ words, I really need to actually start writing the plot of Naruto instead of just filler and character development.


	8. 날 보고 미쳐

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just some filler, a few changes but mostly just filler.

_“Do you want to know the truth Sasuke-kun? Do you want to know the truth behind every painful memory you carry? Itachi let you win Sasuke, he could have killed you easily but he loved you too much.”_

_The teen wearing a purple outfit was staring wide eyed at a bloody slumped figure. Behind him a figure warped into existence._

_Sasuke...Itachi’s younger brother?_

_Sure enough the teen had an uncanny resemblance to Itachi, the only major difference being their chakra: where Itachi’s chakra was warm and passionate, Sasuke’s was cold and distant._

_The figure behind Sasuke came closer into view and you couldn’t hold back a gasp. The Uchiha Madara imposter stood behind Sasuke, he had changed his mask and cut his hair but there was no mistaking that chakra signature._

_“What are you talking about? Itachi killed our entire family. I brought him down in an all out battle. Did you miss that? Who the fuck are you to tell me such lies!?”_

_“I too am of the Uchiha clan though I opened my eyes and left before you were even born. My name is Uchiha Madara, and I worked closely with your brother.”_

_The two Uchiha continued to talk, the truth of the masacre and Konoha’s dirty secrets were revealed and it left both you and Sasuke reeling. Sasuke had just killed his older brother who only did what he did because he was acting on orders. Konoha was complacent in the experimentation of dozens of children by the hand of Orochimaru. Danzo had paid Orochimaru to implant a dozen sharingan into his arm and had Uchiha Shisui’s mangekyou in his right eye socket._

_By the end of the conversation Sasuke was cursing Konoha and swearing to destroy it. If Itachi’s dead and beaten body was anything to go by then he definitely was capable of doing so._

_You were confused and angry. Konoha was your village, your family and friends all lived there. You hadn’t known the third hokage, he died before you were born but everyone only spoke of him in high regards. Had he really allowed such atrocities to occur in the name of “peace”? You were brought out of your doubts by “Madara’s” next sentence._

_“You wish to impose your will onto those who hurt you, I will support you in this. Bring destruction to Konoha, make them grovel at your feet. I will give you the Uchiha’s ultimate power so long as you join my organization.”_

_“Why would I listen to you? I can bring down Konoha all on my own, I don’t need your phony power!”_

_“By the time you do you’ll be completely blind, just like Itachi. Come Sasuke, bring your brother’s eyes. I’m going to implant them into your own, doing so will grant you the eternal mangekyou sharingan. Then we can bring havoc and chaos into this putrid world.”_

_With that all three bodies disappear into a black vortex, leaving you alone. Your thoughts were running wild, if Konoha was guilty of everything “Madara” had claimed then were you wrong to want to protect it? You knew Itachi had acted on orders from Danzo but had the Sandaime Hokage condoned it?_

_Before you could possibly connect any events to others the ground trembled. A humanoid plant popped its head out of the ground, half of it’s face white while the other was black. The white side seemed to be more wacky and jolly while the black side was grumpy and cynical._

_You watched and listened to the two sides argue for a bit before the black side said something rather concerning._

_“Obito better get his act together and capture the last two tailed beasts soon. Mother is getting impatient and I don’t know if I can deal with his stupid personality any longer.”_

_“Tobi, he said to call him Tobi! He doesn’t want anyone to know he’s Obito, he wants to be known as Tobi!”_

_“Shut up you imbecile! Tobi, Obito, Madara who the fuck cares? We only help him until he no longer is useful to us, once mother Kaguya returns she’ll kill him and everyone inside of the infinite tsukuyomi. Let’s go, before that idiot realizes we’re gone.”_

_With that the humanoid plant wiggled back underground. You were in shock, complete blatant shock. Tsunade and Jiraiya were under the impression that the Akatsuki were being led by someone named Pein, who wielded the rinnegan. But minutes before you had heard Uchiha Madara or Obito, claim that the Akatsuki was his organization, and now there was some plant person claiming that Obito was just being used for their own benefit, for someone named Kaguya?_

_The entire scene jumbled every emotion you had towards your village, you had to find out if what Obito had said was true. You also had to somehow stop Sasuke from killing Itachi, and convince Obito that he was being played like a fiddle. One thing was certain however._

_Everyone in your village was a liar._

***

You were bloody, bruised and angry. Opposite of you was Sai, an elite member of ROOT, who was equally bruised and bloody. The two of you had been sparring for the last four hours straight, ninjutsu, taijutsu, and kenjutsu had been used and you were just about done. The entirety of ROOT had come out to witness the fight. Despite having gone on for hours neither of you let up, the fight was honestly anyone’s game, it was only a matter of who would pass out first. 

The entire match, Sai had been taunting you with insults to your skill, claiming that, for being Danzo-sama’s pupil you were nowhere near the skill level he had imagined. This of course spurred you on and resulted in what was supposed to be a fifteen minute match lasting well over four hours. 

You knew you weren’t going to last much longer so you decided to end it with one last jutsu. Flash stepping close to Sai you trapped him in ninja wire and moved your hands to form the snake hand seal. 

“Suiton: Bakusui Shōha!”

The remaining amount of disposable chakra you had was completely used up by this jutsu. A behemoth of a wave surged from your mouth and you stood triumphantly on top of it. The ROOT agents and Danzo were cheering at your jutsu while Sai’s face morphed from indifference to fearful. 

You could kill him, the size of your jutsu would most likely kill him on impact and if not then he would definitely drown before escaping your ninja wire. Now you were presented with a dilemma, do you kill Ino’s future husband or not? 

_Let’s be honest, Sai is a total sweetheart once Naruto opens up his heart. Ah, I’ll let him live._

Willing your chakra to obey, you allowed the wave to come crashing down right where Sai was, except you had it parted so he wouldn’t get hit. His eyes were closed and he was holding his breath, you couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty at yourself for actually considering killing him. 

When your wave began to calm you quickly positioned yourself behind him, one kunai against his throat and the other over his liver. You had won, if he tried to escape or harm you a simple flick of your wrist or twitch of your fingers could end his life. He too realized this and yielded immediately. 

How the fuck had your day ended with you almost killing a boy out of anger? You were removing yourself from Sai and trying to bandage your numerous wounds when you thought back to how your morning had started. 

***

Waking up to Fū and Torune banging pots and pans next to your ears had been funny and cute the first two times, now you were pissed. 

“Wakey Wakey Ayumi-chan! Maybe today we can actually make it outside to train, wouldn’t that be some impressive progress!”

_Weren’t ROOT agents supposed to be emotionless?_

Fū was the one to tease you about your lack of motivation, he believed that you could get over your heart break by training and acting as if it had never happened. The first two days you found his overwhelming outpouring of love and support completely adorable, it made you feel warm and fuzzy inside. Torune was always the much more quiet of the two, instead of yelling his love and support for you he showed it through his actions. 

The two had made your stay away from your house so loving and warm, and now you were sick of it. Day three of their stupid optimistic bullshit was your breaking point. You were still massively hurt by what had transpired after your match with Sakura and Naruto but you figured that mess was easier to deal with than your two torturers. 

“Torune, why does a kind and gentle soul like you hang around someone as awful as Fū? You shine so brightly on your own baby boy, you don’t need Fū stealing your thunder.”

Torune let out a gentle laugh as he patted your rat nest of hair while his friend squawked with indignation. In the now three days you had spent sleeping in the ROOT barracks, not once had you actually gotten up from your bed aside for using the restroom. Fū and Torune would spend their entire days simply sitting with you and comforting you the best they could and you loved them for that. 

Danzo had visited you plenty as well, each time he seemed to bring a different type of food but your body couldn’t stomach it. Before you had laughed at the idea of getting physically sick over heartbreak but now it didn’t sound so far fetched. 

Deciding to finally give into Fū and train a bit you removed yourself from your surprisingly plush covers, grabbed a fresh set of shinobi issued uniform and went into the bathroom to freshen up. 

“Yeah Ayumi-chan! That’s right, get up and show the world who’s boss! C’mon Torune, help me encourage her. Let’s go Ayumi-chan, let’s go!”

You couldn’t help but smile at Fū’s antics, when he got comfortable around you his actions and speech patterns mimicked Tony’s to a T. 

When you emerged from the restroom, you couldn’t help but internally squeal at the sight that greeted you. Gone were the two elite shinobi but your bed had two humanoid lumps underneath it’s covers. Fū’s jolly voice carried from underneath the covers as did Torune’s baritone laughter. 

The two were close, they had been partners since they had entered ROOT at young ages. Torune had been horribly shy and Fū took an instant liking to him. They claimed they were only “best friends, like brothers” but you greatly suspected that there was something more between the two of them. 

Making a quick decision to throw professionality out the window, you got a running start and then hurled yourself at both teens. Torune let out a quiet “oof” and Fū a shrill “OW!” upon impact. You laughed at their different responses and then crawled underneath the covers as well.

“Hey boys, room for one more?”

And just like that, the three of you spent the majority of the morning messing around in a bed meant for one person. Not hearing the door to the barracks open, nor someone approach the bed, both you and Fū let out ear splitting screams when the covers were yanked off. 

“Ah, it’s good to see you in better spirits today Ayumi-chan. Danzo-sama and the rest of us have been worried about you.”

A pale white face, short black hair and dull black eyes stared down onto you and your friends. Sai was another of Danzo’s strongest agents, his fighting technique was sleek and his knack for ninjutsu was astounding.

“Oh Sai-san, yes. Fū and Torune have successfully made me feel a bit better. We were just about to go out and train a bit. Would you like to come with us?”

A fake smile was plastered onto his pale face as he answered.

“If it’s not an inconvenience then I’d love to.”

***

And now you were here, soaking wet, bleeding from multiple places and tired as shit. Sai was no better, he also was soaking wet, bleeding from multiple places and tired as shit though his eyes were different.

Before, he would look at you with something akin to arrogance, his chōjū giga was difficult to counter so most of his spars ended within the first few minutes. But now he was looking at you with...fear? His pupils were dilated and his carotid was pumping blood at double it’s normal speed. You had scared him, he truly believed you were going to kill him with your last jutsu. 

Before you could speak with him, Danzo had made his way to you and was patting your head. 

“My, my Ayumi-chan, you really have been working on your endurance and chakra control haven’t you? If it were me in your place, I would have tapped out hours ago. And the size and power behind that last jutsu was completely amazing. I’m proud of you, my child.”

Your heart thumped in glee at your teacher’s praise, he never once failed to make you smile.

“You have made me into everything that I am sensei, without your dedication to my training I would not be where I am. Thank you for believing in me Danzo-sensei.”

Said man brought you into a warm hug before standing back and smiling at you. 

“Perhaps we should get you out of your wet clothes and feed you something? You haven’t eaten in three days, my dear.”

“Actually, I think I’m going to go back to the compound. It’s been days since they’ve seen or heard from me, they’re bound to be anxious. I wouldn’t want them to go snooping around looking for me and discover what we’ve been doing sensei. Thank you for housing and caring for me these last couple of days.”

“Of course my child, I will send Fū and Torune to retrieve you when you have training again. Take care.”

He kissed your forehead and walked away, leaving you in the care of your two friends. By now most of the other ROOT shinobi had cleared the area, only you and the two goons were left. 

“Hey guys, do you think you could help me with something?”

“Yeah, what’s up little monster.”

You tensed a bit at the nickname but didn’t voice your disdain for it. Given what you were capable of at your age you supposed the nickname was fitting. One of your hands went to your back, feeling the long wet locks of hair stick to your skin and shirt. You had never been a fan of long hair, it got in the way when you were fighting but your mother had made it clear that “a proper lady has beautiful, long hair, supple skin not marred with scars and a kind, giving heart.” 

You let your hair grow out to please her and your father, something you highly regret now. Sai had grabbed you by your hair at least eight times, proving how much of a liability long hair was. Turning to look at your two closest friends you made up your mind. 

“I want to cut and dye my hair.”

***

Two hours later you had deep burgundy hair with light blonde tips, your hair now just barely reached your shoulder blades, a drastic difference to your once knee length locks. As it turned out, Fū had plenty of experience dying hair, he was naturally dirty blonde since he was from the Yamanaka clan but was currently sporting bright orange hair. Torune had simply watched and made fun of you when you were bleaching your hair. The end result was exactly what you wanted, it looked identical to your hair from before, from your last memories with the Avengers. 

Your hair had dried into prominent waves and your head felt thirty pounds lighter. You still looked like you had just come home from the war but that didn’t matter. You were giddy with excitement, your new hair reminded you of home, your endgame. You were going to see your Avenger’s family, no matter the cost. 

Thanking both men for their help, you shunshined to the middle of the village before slowly making your way in the direction of the hokage tower. You knew you were in no condition to continue your apprenticeship with Tsunade, she was in close cahoots with your fa- Shikaku and right now you wanted nothing from him. 

Ignoring the pointed stares and the whispers you kept your pace slow as you thought of the right words to say. You didn’t notice yourself pass Genma and Raidō until you were lifted from the ground and squished between two shinobi. 

“Baby Nara! Where have you been?! Everyone has been so worried about you, dear god what happened to you?! Where did you get all of these cuts and bruises, holy fuck your hair! Oh you poor baby, who did this to you…”

The two went on about your disappearance and appearance for a bit, you lacked the energy to make them stop so you just let it happen. When the two noticed your silence they let you back down and studied your face. When they had finally quietted, you spoke. 

“Genma, Raidō, I need to speak to the Hokage. Please let me go.”

Both men stiffened at your emotionless response but released you. You continued your walk towards the Hokage’s office as if the interaction with the two jounin hadn’t happened. You paid no attention to the worried looks the two jounin gave your form, nor how they quickly took to the rooftops once you were further away. You continued to your goal, unwavering.

***

“So let me get this straight, you want to quit your apprenticeship with me because I’m close to your father? That’s the most stupid reason for quitting an apprenticeship I’ve ever heard! What the hell has gotten into you, I heard about your little breakdown in the Nara forest after your match so I understand you wanting a bit of space but look at you. You’re bloody and bruised, your chakra is almost completely gone and your hair, what the fuck did you do to your hair?”

Tsunade was not happy with your current state. She broke her desk in two pieces when you told her you wished to quit your apprenticeship. 

“I need time to come to terms with a few things. I cannot do my job as a nurse practitioner without having a clear mind. My appearance is a direct result of me battling with a few demons I have.”

“So you’re just going to give up? I thought you wanted to save your friends and family, I thought you wanted to become a respected shinobi and protect your village? You’ve been given a gift Ayumi, you can change the future. You can save our men from dying and you’re choosing to give up?”

“I will continue to provide you vital information to keep shinobi casualties to a minimum. If a big event is close to happening, I will personally deal and take care of it. I’m not abandoning this village, I simply need time.”

“You’ll personally take care of it? Do tell me how because last time I checked you were still a child, not even an academy student.”

“I took down two chunin didn’t I? One of which is trained under you and the other is the nine tails jinchuriki trained under Jiraiya-sama. I know the enemy’s weaknesses and I’m more than capable of taking care of myself. I don’t have anyone else I’ve confessed my visions to. All I need is for you to trust me and give me your support, Hokage-sama.”

It was quiet between the two of you after your last sentence. You were bowing deeply while Tsunade was studying your form. After a few minutes of silence you heard her let out a deep sigh. 

“C’mere gaki.”

Obeying imeadiately you scurried closer to the woman and squeaked when she brought you into a bone crushing hug. You unconsciously cuddled closer to the woman, unaware at the tears dripping down your face. Tsunade had always had your best interest in mind and not once had failed you. Settling you onto her lap she rocked your smaller than average body and allowed you to cry into her chest for a long while.

When you finally were composed enough she spoke.

“Gaki, I cannot imagine what you must be feeling right now. I can’t imagine what you’ve been dealing with at home. I’m sorry if I’ve failed you as a mentor, I should have noticed how much you were hurting and done something about it. The truth is, I know you’re more than capable of keeping yourself safe. You’ve gotten so strong, stronger than anyone I’ve ever known, but you’re still a child. I know you do training outside of what I teach you, you made that very obvious when you amazed everyone with your ninjutsu and genjutsu, and I trust you to make your own decisions. You will always have my full support, you are my precious daughter after all.” 

You let out a loud sob at her words, the human body was only capable of crying around thirty tears every day but you seemed to cry double that. Again, Tsunade just held you and let you cry. When you calmed down again you blushed and ducked your head, eliciting gentle laughter from the Hokage.

“You will always be my student, even if you decide to stop studying under me. I love you Ayumi-chan, no matter what may happen please just know that I love you as if you were my own daughter.”

You nodded and thanked her profusely for understanding. Standing up from her lap and wiping away your last few tears, you were genuinely surprised when she held out a navy blue hitai-ate. You gasped and looked up to her face.

“You’ve earned it gaki, I don’t know many other four year olds who can easily perform B rank jutsus, create techniques and fight like you do.”

You gently took the headband and looked at your reflection in the metal. Your eyes welled with tears but you kept them at bay, you had done enough crying in front of Tsunade already. You wanted to accept it, you wanted to wear the hitai-ate with pride and serve your village. But at the same time, you didn’t. There was a small voice in the back of your head telling you that becoming a shinobi would only hinder you, and that voice was steadily getting louder. 

You handed back the headband, taking in the surprised look of your shishou and clearing your throat.

“I don’t think I’m capable of handling the shinobi lifestyle emotionally. Please allow me some time to learn how to control my emotions. I want to be a great shinobi, not one who cries at the drop of a pin.”

Just before you turned away you stopped and asked a question you had been sitting on.

“Tsunade-sama, was the Sandaime Hokage a good hokage? Was he really as kind as the history books and people say he was?”

Tsunade seemed a bit taken aback by your out of the blue question but answered nonetheless.

“My sensei was human, he made mistakes and had flaws like everyone else but his intentions were always for the benefit of Konoha and it’s people. Towards the end of his life he did get a bit soft but I genuinely believe he thought he was doing the right thing.”

“I see. Thank you Hokage-sama.” 

You bowed deeply and gave your ex shishou one last hug before body flickering out of her office. 

You were deep inside of the Nara forest when you let your tears fall, finally someone aside from your sensei had truly acknowledged your efforts and rewarded you for them. Despite not accepting the reward you felt accomplished, this was possibly the most important step in your plan to save the world and finally, you had achieved it. Recognition and reputation were two very important factors in creating a hero, and now you were well on your way to building both. 

You stayed in the forest until nightfall and fell asleep among the deer. 

***

Shikaku was believed to be the smartest man throughout the elemental nations, his track record was close to flawless. That being said, he was also the world’s biggest idiot and an asshole.

He hadn’t realized how much he was hurting his own child until she had an entire mental breakdown in front of him. Watching the small girl physically hurt herself to grab his attention and then curse him, his family and friends until her voice was raw was agonizing. Nothing had hurt Shikaku more than hearing his baby say she hated him, that she would have rather been aborted than live the life she was living now. 

Looking back on his actions and attitude towards Ayumi from the last two years had him wanting to bang his head against a brick wall until he bled. The truth was he hadn’t stopped loving Ayumi during these last two years, in fact the love he held for his daughter only grew with every passing day. She was getting so big, albeit she was still considerably small for her age but still, progress was progress. If Shikaku had to guess then he would say Ayumi almost reached his hip. The fact that Shikaku had to guess said a lot about how wrong this entire situation was. 

Shikaku’s neglect started the moment Kakashi’s ninken delivered an urgent message to follow them, that they had found Ayumi’s body. His entire world stopped at their wording, “they had found her body”, implying that she was no longer alive. He so desperately wanted to fall to his knees and cry but he was with the Hokage and the head of the Torture and Interrigation department, he had to be resepctful towards them. 

Following the pack of dogs to a scene of Kakashi destroying trees made his heart sink deeper into his chest, turning his head to see the naked and heavily bruised body of his baby made his world stop for a second time. His two year old daughter had been abducted from her hospital room, a place that should have been safe. Her captors had obviously beaten her and reopened her wounds, and now here she was naked. 

Shikaku wanted to vomit at the thought of someone violating his most precious treasure, he wanted to crawl and take her place, have them do it to him instead of his baby. At a quick glance her genitals hadn’t looked violated but you could never be too sure. At the very least, Shikaku could try to cope with the fact that she no longer had to suffer, he hoped with all of his heart that her passing had been peaceful, that she hadn’t been scared. 

Then Kakashi spoke. 

“She’s alive, her heartbeat is very faint and slow but it’s there. I didn’t want to worsen her injuries so I didn’t touch her..”

_What?_

“Kakashi is right, her heart is barely working and her left lung is filled with blood but she’s alive. Shikaku, your daughter is alive.”

Hope and dread filled Shikaku’s body. His daughter was alive, she still had a chance to live a long, virtuous life. Shikaku had a chance to see her grow into the beautiful woman he knew she would be.

At the same time Shikaku wanted to kill whoever did this to her. Whoever had targeted his child, beaten her until she was black and blue, and then done God knows what to her, deserved to die the most painful death Shikaku could bestow. 

Watching as his daughter was taken back to the hospital for a second time within the week made Shikaku’s blood boil beyond belief. A firm hand on his shoulder brought him out of his murderous daze. Morino Ibiki was not a man who comforted people, his job was to understand emotions well enough to break his victims down. 

“We’ll catch the sick fucks who took her Shikaku, we won’t rest until we do. You have my word on that.”

Ibiki really was shit at comforting people. 

***

A month after the incident, the T&I department stopped investigating the case, insufficient evidence they claimed. That was enough to send Shikaku over the edge, if no one was going to be investigating his daughters abduction then he would do it himself. Taking on the investigation on top of his own paperwork ended with him barely making it home on time for dinner and only playing a game of shogi with Shikamaru before he would need to sleep. 

Whenever he would see Ayumi he was reminded of his failure to catch her abductors and he would scowl to himself about it. 

He hadn’t thought about the fact that maybe, just maybe, his daughter could pick up his shift in mood. She was only two, she couldn’t possibly be able to pick up social cues and moods. 

Then one night over dinner she told them that the Hokage had taken an interest in her and wanted to make her one of her apprentices, alongside Shizune-san and Sakura-san. Shikamaru had been immensely proud of his younger sister, having the strongest ninja in the village want you as an apprentice was huge. His wife was concerned, she knew the consequences Ayumi could face should she over exert herself with jutsus. Shikaku himself was livid, how could the hokage offer his daughter such a dangerous opportunity, one they all knew his daughter would never turn down. 

In his blind rage he had stalked out of the house and gone straight to the hokage, not once thinking about how his actions could possibly hurt anyone. 

After that, time seemed to simply slip through Shikaku’s fingers. Never once had he thought about stopping his investigation, he was determined to make sure his daughter never had to go through something like that ever again. 

Plenty of times Inoichi and Choza would remind him to spend time with Ayumi, it wasn’t difficult to notice the relationship strain between father and daughter. Asuma had asked him if he was already teaching his baby shogi and Shikaku had blanked because yes he had thought about it but there simply wasn’t time for that. 

Months later, Asuma had come up to his office and asked him why he hadn’t taught his daughter shogi and Shikaku gave the excuse that he was planning on teaching her this week only to find out that Asuma taught her when the family had been out at a clan meeting. He couldn’t even begin to explain the shock that ran through his body at the thought of someone else teaching his kid his favorite game. 

Instead of dwelling on his feelings he simply waved the jounin off and continued with his mountain of paperwork. 

When his own son brought up the disturbing conversation he had with his sister, Shikaku hauled his ass up to her room, sighing in defeat when he opened the door and found his baby asleep. Dried tear tracks were clearly visible on her baby face and Shikaku felt like shit for neglecting his daughter to the point of her doubting his love for her. This time he swore he would clear everything up with little Ayumi-chan, his baby would no longer doubt her father.

But of course he failed to clear anything up because all of a sudden there were whispers of a new ROOT agent. Shikaku had been investigating ROOT for years now, this new information was crucial to everything so he had to leave that important conversation with his daughter for another day. 

All of that had led to him finally catching a break from work and hanging out with his two best friends at an Akimichi restaurant they used to frequent. They had been contently converseing and enjoying some herbal tea when Kakashi flew through the restaurant doors and became embedded into the far wall of the establishment. 

Before any of them had time to react, his little shadow had popped in. Her eyes were frantic, blood was running down her temple and she was breathing heavily. All at once Shikaku’s world stopped for a third time in his life because he truly believed that someone was after his daughter again. When her frantic eyes met his own, she let out an audible sigh and shuffled over to where he was sitting. What he didn’t expect was for her to hand him a brand new Icha Icha book.

“Father, Kakashi-nii is so considerate. He went on a trip recently and thought I would enjoy this book as a souvenir. After I read it, we can add it to the collection you have hidden in that box on the bottom shelf of the bookcase in the living room.”

After that she had healed herself as much as she could, needing Tsunade-sama’s help to pop her shoulder back in. How often did she get her shoulder dislocated for her to not react to it being popped back in? 

Then she had asked him if he would attend her spar, she looked so timid and sad, like she already knew he would say no. Catching his friends sharp nods he replied, heart breaking at the look of genuine surprise his baby sent him. 

Shikaku wasn’t sure what the Hokage was expecting, his daughter was four years old, both Naruto and Sakura were seventeen and trained to fight. He didn’t know why she wanted to humiliate his daughter in front of countless shinobi but he didn’t voice his concerns.

When it came time to start the spar, Shikaku was shocked to see his daughter breakdown crying while hugging his younger brother. The hard glare Ensui sent him after she had calmed down only added to his confusion. 

Then he watched as his daughter, his baby, completely kicked Naruto and Sakura’s asses. She had performed a powerful mizurappa to start the match, then a raiton laser beam. Then, to everyone’s shock and amazement she performed Kakashi’s signature move, chidori, only she added to it and made it her own. 

Shikaku felt like he didn’t even know who his daughter was, since when had she been able to do such things? She was performing B and A rank jutsus like they were nothing. Even after taking a full rasengan to her back, she stood back up and finished the fight with astounding kenjutsu combos. 

Using Kokuangyo no jutsu to take away her opponents eyesight, using fear mongering to get them and the rest of the crowd to believe she was going to kill them, was technique not even Shikamaru could pull off. Deceiving everyone into thinking she was going for the kill when she really was going to heal them was something he never thought she was going to be able to do. 

She shouldn’t have been able to do that, her heart condition was supposed to have killed her from the large amounts of chakra she was using. She wasn’t even using the entirety of her chakra either, around seventy percent of it was still sealed away, unable to be accessed. 

If Ayumi was already this strong using only about thirty percent of her chakra, how powerful would she grow to be? 

That thought quickly left Shikaku as the match was called in her favor and he turned to walk away. How had his daughter learned such high level techniques? Who was teaching her this? 

Shikaku’s guilt surged in his chest at the thought of someone else taking over the role he was supposed to be playing as her trainer. He was supposed to have been the one to teach her everything she knows. How much of her life had he already missed?

Just as he was about to let his frustrations out he noticed that she had followed him. She was trying to get his attention but he wouldn’t give it to her, he couldn’t look her in the eye when he had done over the last two years aside from neglect her. 

From there everything had escalated too quickly for Shikaku to truly understand what was happening. He had only watched as his daughter, his strong and independent daughter, broke down and cursed to the world. He was only vaguely aware of the group that had formed around them, hidden in the trees of the Nara forest. He wasn’t embarrassed to start crying when she told him she hated him. He wasn’t embarrassed when he fell to the dirt ground of the Nara forest and started bawling like a child when she body flickered away. 

Nara Shikaku was not embarrassed when his younger brother, Nara Ensui, dropped down next to him and tried to help him up. He was ashamed. He had broken his daughter, broken her into so many little pieces, he wasn’t sure she could ever be the same. 

Ayumi didn’t return home that night, nor the day after. Two days and three nights, that’s how long the Nara family and friends had been waiting for their youngest to come home and still nothing. 

They were all gathered at the house when Raidō and Genma burst in, both yelling at the top of their lungs making whatever they were saying impossible to understand. Yoshino had been the one to smack them both and demand they speak properly. Genma spoke.

“Baby Na- I mean, Ayumi-chan! We saw her, she was on her way to the Hokage’s office.”

That got everyone’s attention, but again Shikaku’s wife was the first to speak.

“Was she okay?! Did you talk to her? Did she tell you where she’s been this entire time? Did she look like she’d been fed?”

“Ahh Yoshino-san, please let us answer what we can. Um, we only spoke to her a bit, she seemed pretty...out of it? I don’t know the right word to describe her tone when she spoke to us. In regards to her appearance, ugh, you may want to sit down.”

Raidō waited for the Nara patriarch's wife to sit before continuing.

“Well her hair was cut, I think about shoulder length? Maybe a bit longer but I’m not sure. It was also dyed a dark red soo… Oh, she also looked like she had gotten in quite a tussle with someone. Fresh bruises and cuts were all over her body and her chakra was really low. She only asked us to let her down before saying she was going to see the Hokage. Then she just walked away. But she didn’t seem completely there, like, she sounded emotionless. It was a bit unnerving.”

After that was said everyone was quiet, they were all processing what they had just heard. Shikaku was simply relieved to hear that his daughter was alright, alive, but what was this about her looking fresh out of a fight? His son was the one to voice the unanimous decision everyone in the room had made.

“I guess we’ll just have to wait until the troublesome girl comes back to make a full assessment ourselves.”

And so they waited again.

***

An hour and a half later, Shikaku felt it. Ayumi’s chakra signature was in the Nara forest. Looking towards his brother, he noticed that he too felt her signature. Both brothers locked eyes but Ensui was the one to ask.

“You want me to go get her?

“No, let’s wait to see if she’s comfortable enough to come on her own. If by nightfall she isn’t back then we’ll go get her.”

And so, they waited once again.

***

Once nightfall fell, Shikaku, Ensui, Shikamaru and Asuma were out the door and went into the Nara forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My birthday is on the 15th so I thought I'd finish this chapter as an early valentine's and birthday gift from me to all of you! Any and all feedback is much appreciated! I promise everything I write serves a higher purpose than just furthering the plot but yes, I agree Ayumi is a big ole dummy.


	9. 잠시 눈을 감아

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WOW IS THAT ACTUAL NARUTO PLOT??? yes everyone we have officially entered shippuden.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we get into this chapter I'd like to remind you that even though we're going to follow the events of shippuden, the timeline may be pretty fucked up. That means that the entire Gaara/Akatsuki arc will happen but the time in which it does will not match canon. 
> 
> Also, I'm altering Team Ebisu's age's to be 12 because I don't want them to be too old to be genin! 
> 
> IMPORTANT! IMPORTANT! IMPORTANT!  
> This starts off with spoilers for Avenger's Endgame, so if you haven't seen it yet tread carefully! I've been pretty clear with Natasha's current state of being but if you haven't pieced that together yet then... sorry my dude.

_Vormir was a beautiful planet. You had only been to space once before and that had ended with the death of not only the Mad Titan but also your cumulative hope to bring back half of all living creatures. Besides, now you were here with your best friend, your savior, your soulmate._

_You and Barton had been tasked with retrieving the soul stone to complete the new infinity gauntlet Tony was planning on building. You had reached the highest mountain and were both thoroughly spooked when Red Skull made his appearance._

_“What you seek lies in front of you... as does what you fear.”_

_Looking to where he was gazing, all you could see was a steep cliff. Walking near it you looked down and saw nothing but the foot of the mountain._

_“The stone is down there?”_

_You were questioning the floating been since he obviously knew more than he was saying._

_“For one of you. For the other... In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange. A soul, for a soul.”_

_You and Clint both stiffened before you sat down on a nearby log while Clint began pacing. Silence over took the two of you until Clint finally spoke._

_“How's it going? Jesus...Maybe he's making this shit up.”_

_Clint was panicking, you had known him long enough to notice that. He was cursing under his breath and running his hand through his hair._

_“No. I don't think so.”_

_“Why, 'cause he knows your Daddy's name?”_

_“I didn't. Thanos left here with the stone and without his daughter. It's not a coincidence.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_Clint’s eyes looked with yours and it left you breathless. One of you wasn’t leaving this mountain, one of you wasn’t ever going to see the rest of the gang again. The only question was, who?_

_Mustering up what little courage you had gathered over the last ten years, you spoke in a clear, confident voice._

_“Whatever it takes.”_

_His gaze was unwavering._

_“Whatever it takes.”_

_You stood up and made your way closer to your soulmate, speaking as you walked._

_“If we don't get that stone, billions of people stay dead.”_

_“Then I guess we both know who it's gotta be.”_

_“I guess we do.”_

_Before you could pass your friend and walk closer to the edge he grabbed your hand, interlacing his fingers with yours._

_“I'm starting to think– we mean different people here, Natasha.”_

_His voice wavered, it was faint and nobody would have caught it but you were trained to notice those things. Looking back into Clint’s tired eyes you spoke your peace._

_“For the last five years I've been trying to do one thing: Get to right here. That's all it's been about. Bringing everybody back.”_

_“Oh, don't you get all decent on me now.”_

_“What, you think I wanna do it? I'm trying to save your life, you idiot.”_

_“Yeah, well, I don't want you to, because I– Natasha, you know what I've done. You know what I've become.”_

_Within the last five years Clint had left his life on his farm and became a notorious vigilante. He used the brewing chaos of the snap to impose his own justice on the world. He was what you once were. But just like he did for you, you pulled him out of it. You gave him a new purpose._

_There was a chance that they, the Avengers, could reverse everything Thanos did. Everyone who had been lost could possibly be brought back. He could get back his family. You swallowed at the hopeless look on his face._

_“I don't judge people on their worst mistakes.”_

_“Maybe you should.”_

_“You didn't.”_

_“You're a pain in my ass, you know that?”_

_You smiled at your longtime friend and leaned closer to him. Both of you touched foreheads and simply breathed together before Clint whispered to you._

_“Okay. You win.”_

_All of the air left left your lungs as your soulmate hurled you to the ground. He looked at your downed form and took off his arrow sling._

_“Tell my family I love them.”_

_Fueled by anger and annoyance you threw yourself at him and pinned him underneath you._

_“You tell them yourself.”_

_You electrocute Clint and run towards the cliff. Clint got up and shot an explosive arrow knocking you down, taking the opportunity to run and jump off the cliff. You jumped down after him and hooked him up to a grappling hook secured to the top of the mountain._

_He tugged on the hook and cursed when he realized he’d lost, the only thing stopping you from falling was his hand that was tightly holding onto yours. He looks down at your face and breaks._

_“Damn you!”_

_You smiled, at the very least, the last thing you would see before passing would be your best friend's face._

_“Let me go.”_

_“No. Please, no.”_

_Clint was crying, he was desperately holding onto your hand and the grappling hook, obviously trying to save you both. A thick ball formed in the back of your throat but you spoke around it._

_“It's okay.”_

_“Please– No!”_

_You gave your soulmate one last watery smile before kicking off the wall, effectively getting out of his grip and free falling for about fifteen seconds. The entire time you looked at your soulmate, the man who had given you a new purpose in life aside from killing._

_You lived the last half of your life atoning for all of the sins you had committed in the first half, providing your skillset to anyone in need. You had made some eccentric, powerful friends. You had become an aunt to three beautiful children. You had finally become someone you were proud to be. Moments before you hit the ground your mind replayed a conversation you had with the Madame of the Red Room just before your graduation ceremony._

_“The ceremony is necessary for you to take your place in the world."_

_"We have no place in the world."_

_"Exactly."_

_The Madame was wrong, you did have a place in the world and it was beside the Avengers._

***

_Tony and Steve were above you, they were wearing their quantum suits and they were both crying. Behind them the rest of the remaining avengers were looking at your downed form and the cliff._

_“Nat, Nat, are you still there? Natasha! Natasha, answer me!”_

_Steve was shaking you, he was shaking you and screaming at you and crying at the same time. Tony was asking FRIDAY to take note of your vitals, and start the process of preserving your body. Steve asked why you were responding, only to be answered by Nebula._

_“This has to have been the Soul Stone’s doing. Each of the Infinity stones acts like a living organism, they can choose to work as intended or not at all. Romanoff should have died from that jump, Gamora did, that’s how Thanos received the Soul Stone the first time. The reason she’s breathing right now is most likely a result of the stone acting on its own. It’s keeping her alive, that’s why Clint didn’t receive the stone.”_

_“Then what are we supposed to do now? FRIDAY is picking up breathing and a heartbeat but no brain activity. We have five of the six stones and you said Thanos knows we’re here looking for them. This spells all kinds of trouble.”_

_For once Tony was the one being calm while Steve kept holding your body close to him. Behind them, everyone else was chattering away and trying to make sense of the situation. A loud beeping from Tony’s monitor caught everyone’s attention._

_“Holy shit, alright FRIDAY is picking up startling levels of gamma radiation coming from Nat’s body. Like Capsicle, you’re gonna want to suit up completely if you want to keep holding her like that.”_

_Everyone did so and watched as your body was covered in an orange mist. Nebula broke the awestruck silence._

_“I can’t believe it, the stone... it’s using her body.”_

_Steve was beginning to panic again._

_“What? What the hell is it using her body for?!”_

_“I’m not sure, I don’t know enough about the stones to give you an answer.”_

_Before anyone else could say anything FRIDAY alerted everyone to an airship entering the atmosphere._

_“Shit, alright here’s what we’re going to do. Tony, Nebula, we’re taking Nat’s body back with us. If what Nebula said is right then maybe there’s a way to get the soul stone without killing Nat. Everyone has enough Pym Particles to make it back right? Good. Let’s go before Thanos tries taking Nat- Holy shit GET DOWN!”_

_The last thing you saw was an enormous ship reigning fire onto your family._

***  
You woke to the feeling of suffocating. You tried to breathe in but your throat was too swollen to do so. Panicking, you failed to notice four chakra signatures closing in on you. Tears were streaming down your face as you held a green hand up to your throat and your chest, slowly reversing the effects of an asthma attack. 

Once you took your first deep breath, a new wave of emotions hit you like a tidal wave.

_What the hell was that? Why would the team go back for your body if they knew Thanos was after the stones again? What the hell did they mean by “the stone is using her”? Were you actually dead? Does the soul stone using you, tie into you being reborn into this body?_

Again your breathing began getting difficult though it was for a completely different reason. Back in your old life, panic attacks were like daily reminders that you were still human, that despite everything you did for a living, you still were capable of human emotion. Your panic attacks were triggered as a response to any over emotional situation. 

Feeling yourself die and then seeing your friends after dying had to have been one of the most emotional situations you have ever been in. The deer around you tried comforting you while you bawled like a child, their fur was so soft as it rubbed against your wet cheeks. 

Forcing yourself to calm down, you took deep breaths and began singing an old nursery rhyme to yourself. While doing this the sound of leaves rustling around you had you sitting straight, alert. You scanned your surroundings, not once stopping your singing, weaving your chakra throughout the area. Your eyes widened when you felt four chakra signatures surrounding you, listening to you sing softly to yourself. 

Once you finished your song, you calmed yourself. This wouldn’t be like two years ago, you were weak then but now you were strong. You would defend yourself like the shinobi you were, not relying on your liar of a father to come save you. 

Using your chakra to get an idea of their positions you prepared yourself to attack. Deciding to attack the one to your right first, you grabbed two kunai from your pouch and breathed deeply. Body flickering behind the attacker you brought down both knives, intending to have them imbedded into the meat of their shoulders. The person was quick to move out of the way and spoke before you could attack again. 

“Imouto stop! It’s me Shikamaru, don’t be afraid.”

_Oh._

You lowered your kunais but still kept your glare. You were still upset about the event from three days ago. Shikamaru had obviously kept some sort of information regarding your father’s neglect from you and that was highly unacceptable to you. Tapping your foot against the tree branch you were using as a pedestal, you waited for the three stooges to appear beside your brother. 

Sure enough, three more figures joined your brother. You stared at each one and tried to take in their appearance. When it began glaringly obvious that it was too dark to make out their faces you formed the hand seals for chidori and let it light up the space between you and them. 

They were tired, dark circles rimmed their eyes and their posture was more dogshit than it usually was. They looked like they hadn’t eaten or showered since you were gone, something you found stupid and disgusting. 

Keeping your chidori running you eyed them one last time before dispersing your chakra and leaping down to the forest floor. You didn’t say a word as you turned and walked in the direction you knew the Nara compound was in. Behind you the four shinobi followed you, thinking of the right words to say. 

The five of you had exited the forest and were closing in on the head household when Ensui tried to crack a joke.

“Well I’ll be damned, with hair like that you look more Uzumaki than Nara!”

_Maybe things would be easier if I was, I wouldn’t have to worry about being surrounded by liars because I’d either be alone or dead._

You didn’t react to your uncle's attempt at a joke about your appearance, you simply wanted to get home, shower, bandage yourself and then sleep for the rest of the week. 

The rest of the walk home was spent in an awkward silence. Opening the door to your house you were shocked to see all of your friends and family in the living room. Upon entering the house, you were tackled by your mother, she was asking you a plethora of questions that you weren’t going to answer.

“Ayumi! Where have you been?! Do you know how worried we’ve all been? Why didn’t you come home? Why do you look so beat up? Your..your hair! Ayumi, your beautiful hair! What did you do?!”

You pried your mother’s hands off of you and reached down to take off your beaten sandals, the house was quiet despite the large amounts of people inside. You were ignoring and dodging any attempts your mother made towards you, not caring if you were hurting her feelings or being disrespectful. 

“Nara Ayumi, your mother is speaking to you. Answer her.”

And there was your father, trying to assert his position as head of the household by getting you to answer your mother. You ignored him as well and began to slowly make your way towards the stairs only to be blocked by Kakashi. He was smiling while reading his favorite book but you were in no mood to play along with his shenanigans. 

“Move.”

“Mah what was that chibi-chan? Sounded like disrespect to me.”

“Move.”

“Why don’t you answer our questions first and then I’ll see about moving. Also, you might want to consider showing respect to those you speak to, I’m pretty lenient about it but I can already see the rest of the party is growing angry.”

You were beyond done with everyone’s bullshit at this point so you took what little chakra your body had replenished and body flickered behind Kakashi. You were only able to make it up one step before your arm was grabbed and you were roughly pulled back into the living room. 

You made no attempts to escape the firm grasp, instead choosing to go limp as the hands maneuvered your body to sit on tatami mat. You kept your head bowed as you replayed the dream you had while in the forest, your mind was trying to desperately make sense of what you had seen but it couldn’t, resulting in a very strong migraine.

You winced when your father asked you the same questions as before, his voice was rising and he was releasing small amounts of killing intent. You kept quiet, deciding to fall into your mindscape and try to make sense of what you had seen while asleep. 

***

Shikaku wasn’t good at disciplining his children, mostly because his children never needed it. He knew he had messed up, he knew his daughter was hurting but that did not excuse the type of behavior she was displaying in front of her mother and guests. 

His youngest was currently sitting on the tatami mat, spacing out and completely ignoring any questions anyone asked her. His patience was slowly slipping away and it seemed everyone could tell, his brother and Asuma were trying to diffuse the situation with excuses, Inoichi and Choza were trying to convince Shikaku to do this in a more private setting on another day but he refused. Ayumi had blatantly disrespected his wife and she needed to be reprimanded. 

“Ayumi.”

No response, not even a twitch of her finger.

“Nara Ayumi, you will apologize to your mother for disrespecting her earlier. Then you will apologize to everyone here for worrying them. Are you listening to me? Nara Ayumi!”

Still nothing. Patience completely gone, Shikaku hauled his daughter up by her arm, not caring about the amount of force he was using. His wife tried to calm him but it was no use.

“Shikaku, just leave her be. I’m sure she’s had a rough few days, give her time to rest bef-”

“No Yoshino. I may be a lazy has-been but I will not tolerate disrespect, especially from my own child. Nara Ayumi, this is your final chance to apologize before I have to discipline you.”

Shikaku waited exactly five seconds for any response from his daughter before bringing his hand back, Yoshino and Shikamaru were trying to get him to stop but no one made any move to stop him. Bringing his hand down in one swift motion, his own eyes widening at the amount of chakra he used, his hand came in contact with the soft cheek of his youngest. The sound echoing in the dead silent room. 

As Shikaku brought his hand down, Ayumi brought her hand up to touch the now reddened cheek. Her breathing was coming out in small puffs as she moved her head to lock eyes with Shikaku’s. His breath caught in his throat when he noticed the tears welling up in his baby’s eyes.

“Y-you..you h-hit me.”

Shikaku steeled his emotions and kept his voice firm.

“Your behavior is unacceptable, you’ve disrespected everyone in this room. You’ve brought dishonor onto the Nara clan, you had to be disciplined.”

“..Dishonor? I brought dishonor to YOUR clan?”

“Don’t you dare raise your voice at me. I am your father, you will re-”

“You are not my father! You have no right to say shit about me disrespecting you when you blatantly ignored me for the last two years. Nobody in this room deserves my trust and respect when they all lied to my fucking face about you loving me! You’re all liars, liars, LIARS, LIARS!”

With strength he hadn’t known she possessed, Ayumi yanked her arm out of his grasp. When she did so a loud pop was heard, causing everyone to gasp. Shikaku instinctively reached out to try and calm down his daughter but she slapped his hand and backed away from him.

“Why the fuck would I show respect to someone who never respeted me? Do you think I’m stupid? Do you think I’m some stupid, weak little girl who’s incapable of higher thought? I knew you wanted me to be some sort of clan politician, I knew you never believed I could become a shinobi! Why would I respect a woman or man who never supported me!”

“It was for your own goo-”

“Fuck that! It’s not your choice to decide what I do with my life!”

“It is when I know the decisions you would make would put your life at risk!”

“Who cares if I put my life at risk? It’s MY life, not yours, not Yoshino’s, not ojisan’s, not even the goddamn hokage’s! It’s my life, I can do whatever the fuck I want with it!”

“So you would rather die a senseless death than live? Is that what you’re trying to say?!”

“If it meant being away from you then yes! One hundred times yes!”

Shikaku couldn’t say a word after hearing his child just admit to wanting to die than live with him. Had he really messed up that badly? Ayumi was breathing hard, her face was swollen with tears and her cheek was decorated in a large hand shaped bruise. 

“Do you think I like living like this Shikaku? Do you think I like feeling like a complete failure, like feeling ostracized by my own village for my intellect? I know my health isn’t the best, I know how disappointed you must feel to know you created a sickly human being of little worth. I just… I hoped that maybe, since I was your blood, you would try to support me, even just a little…”

And if Shikaku didn’t already feel like complete shit then he sure as hell did now. Before he could say anything Ayumi began talking again, her small voice cracking.

“But I don’t need your support anymore. I don’t need the village’s support anymore. I don’t need anyone’s support anymore because I am strong. I’m not a toddler running away from her attackers anymore. I am strong. I took out two chunin level shinobis easily and I’m sure I could take anyone else on. I am strong. Stronger than anyone else. Tsunade-sama acknowledged that strength, she’s the only one who believed in my dream.”

Ayumi slowly brought her good hand to her chest, letting it rest right above her heart. 

“The Hokage believes me to be strong enough to defend this village, she’s seen the effort I put forth and rewarded me accordingly. What anyone else thinks doesn’t matter, I proved myself to be worthy of a headband and even when I made the decision to turn it down, the point was still proven. I am strong, I don’t need a family to believe in me and support me, I can do that on my own. Even if I mean nothing to you, Shikaku, I mean something to her.”

Shikaku could only watch as his daughter brought her hand down again and tried repositioning her shoulder, shuffling closer to a wall to help her pop it back in. The room was dead silent after that, what else could be said? Shikamaru tried reasoning with the small soon to be shinobi but she quickly shot him down.

“Imouto, no one has ever said you were worthless. Your illness doesn’t define who you are, it doesn’t make you less of a human being than all of us. We and the entire village have always loved you.”

“That’s not true, Shikamaru and you know it. Before I began training I was known as the “sick Nara child”, after Tsunade took me in I was regarded as the “next Uchiha Itachi”. Do you know how sick that is? Not just for the implication that I’d slaughter my clan but because they view Itachi as just that, a murderer. How much pain do you think he must have been in, how much pressure was he under from his clan and village? He was the Uchiha clan heir, and anbu commander and still found time to spend with his younger brother. Someone like that doesn’t just snap and kill their clan.”

“Imouto, what are you trying to say? What are you implying..?”

“...nothing. Forget it. It’s late, I need to shower and sleep. Goodnight everyone.”

Ayumi began to walk away but abruptly stopped and turned, facing Shikaku and glaring at him.

“And Shikaku, don’t you ever hit me again. I don’t give a shit if you gave half of your DNA to create me, no man or woman is ever allowed to hit me without consequence.”

And just like that Ayumi was walking up the stairs to her room. No one made a move to stop her, everyone was too shocked by everything that had happened within the last hour. Yoshino was full blown crying in her spot, Shikamaru was utterly confused and concerned for his baby sister, Ensui was furious at Shikaku and himself for being gone so often and Shikaku wanted to die. He knew he had hurt Ayumi by ignoring her but he hadn’t known about her believing herself to be worthless, much less of the villagers abuse towards her. 

Had he really neglected her that much? Was she right to say he didn’t deserve to be her father?

Bringing him out of his thoughts was Inoichi’s voice. 

“It’s become glaringly obvious that there are more layers to Ayumi-chan’s behavior. Shikaku, Yoshino, don’t be discouraged by this encounter, right now she probably felt cornered by all of us being here. There were a few comments made by her that have me very concerned but now is not the time to deal with that. Keep showing her that you love her, with time she’ll heal enough to revisit what was discussed tonight. Don’t worry about seeing us out, the four of you have enough to discuss as it is. I’ll check in tomorrow.”

With that said, everyone who wasn’t a Nara left Shikaku’s broken home. 

***

The next few days passed by with little progress. Ayumi would wake up before anyone else and leave for the day, only coming home to shower and sleep. Yoshino would make her daughter bento boxes for the day but they were never touched. Shikamaru had tried, on multiple occasions, to invite his sister out for ice cream but she turned him down everytime. Shikaku had tried countless times to play a game of shogi with his youngest but she always ignored him. 

Nobody knew where Ayumi spent the majority of her days, any attempt to trail her ended in failure. All the family knew was that the youngest Nara was coming home everyday with fresh cuts and bruises, her chakra would be depleted and she’d be too tired to stay up for more than an hour. 

The family so desperately wanted to shower the girl in love and affection but they knew she wouldn’t react well to that. Keeping Inoichi’s advice in mind they continued trying to show their love for Ayumi in small ways. 

***

You woke to a consistent tapping on your window, you tried ignoring it, maybe if you paid it no attention it would go away. It didn’t. Muttering curses you forced your aching body out of bed and closer to the window, groaning when you saw that it was a messenger hawk. You retrieved the mission slip from the bird before shutting your window and returning to bed. 

The message was from Tsunade, she had found a temporary genin team for you to join and you were expected to meet with them at 10 am in her office. Despite your decision to not accept a hitai-ate, she believed you needed more “hands-on” experience of the shinobi life. So, while you weren’t an official genin of Konoha, you would be put into a team to see and feel what it’s actually like. 

Checking the clock next to your bed you cursed loudly at the digits displayed: 9:27 am. You dressed yourself in a custom made standard shinobi issued uniform before freshening up in the restroom. Making sure your burgundy hair was tightly braided into dutch braids you descended the stairs. 

Your family was eating breakfast when you made your appearance, shocked at the fact that you were actually home your mother was quick to question you.

“Sweet pea, what are you still doing here? You’re usually gone by the time we’re all awake.”

She was right, the last few days you had spent training with Fū and Torune. You would leave early in the morning and not return until late at night. Your mother would always leave a fresh bento for you to take with you but you never did. You knew she was trying, your brother and father were as well. Deep down you knew she wasn’t at fault for your hurt feelings, she was doing what she thought was best for you and the family and yet here you were, ignoring her and blaming her. Deciding to put forth effort on your end as well you answered her question.

“I’m really sore from training so I slept in. Tsunade-sama sent a message though, she’s found a temporary genin team to place me on. I’m supposed to meet them in her office at 10.”

You glanced shyly at your mother, guilt rising when you took in her shocked expression at your response. She quickly schooled her features and continued the conversation.

“Oh that’s great Ayumi-chan! But you’re not a genin?”

“She wants me to experience a genin’s life before I decide on accepting my hitai-ate.”

“Oh..well are you excited to finally be on a team?”

“I wouldn’t say ‘excited’. I’m more so scared that they’ll belittle me for my age.”

This time it was your brother who answered you.

“You don’t have to worry about that imouto, once they see your skill for the ninja arts they’ll be begging you for tips and tricks.”

You couldn’t help but smile at that, hoping that what your brother was saying would be true. 

“I hope so. I have to leave now if I want to make it on time. I’ll...I’ll try to be home for dinner today, mother. Thank you for the bento boxes you’ve been making. Have a good day at work aniki, Shikaku.”

You were blushing brightly by the time you had finished speaking, being civil with the people you had called ‘liars’ a few days ago was truly embarrassing. Taking to the roofs of the village to bypass the angsty villagers, you prayed that your teammates wouldn’t be stuck up assholes.

***

“Team Ebisu, this is your new temporary teammate. Go on, introduce yourselves.”

Standing in front of you was your new genin team. Going off looks alone, they looked about average. One had adorable round glasses and a runny nose, another wore a long scarf and was actually pretty handsome despite his young age. The only female of the team was giddy with excitement, her eyes would not leave yours as she bounced on the balls of her feet. The jounin looked pretty plain and boring, he didn’t carry a porn book or cigarettes around making him boring in your books. 

“Hai, Hokage-sama. My name is Ebisu, I am the jounin instructor of this team. I will do my best to teach you and keep you safe.”

“Hello, I’m Ise Udon. I love algebra and don’t really like fighting. I hope we get along.”

“My name is Sarutobi Konohamaru and I’m going to become Hokage once I’m older! I aspire to surpass Naruto niichan and bring honor to my grandfather’s legacy!”

“Hi! I’m Kazamatsuri Moegi and I absolutely hate perverts! Being the only girl on the team is hard work but now that you’ll be joining us I’m sure things will get easier!”

_Right, well Udon seems like a sensible dude. I’m sure he’ll be easy to get along with. Konohamaru is passionate and clearly regards Naruto as his role model, cute. Moegi seems a bit...I don’t know actually. I’ll have to get a better read on her later. And Ebisu is a total by-the-books type of guy. Not the worst but also not the best. Well Natasha, this is your new version of the Avengers for now._

“My name is Nara Ayumi. It’s a pleasure to meet all of you and I sincerely hope we can all learn to become strong together.”

From there you were told to meet the team tomorrow morning at training ground 22 for your first D-rank mission. Once team Ebisu left, you turned to your ex shishou and frowned at her amused expression. 

“Why are you laughing shishou?”

“Oh no reason, Ebisu has absolutely no idea what he’s getting into with you on his team though. I’m just imagining the mental breakdown he’ll inevitably have within the next few weeks.”

“You’re sadistic shishou, thank you though. For giving me this opportunity.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever gaki. I get what you’re trying to say. Just enjoy your last day off. You really suck at emotional talks ya know?”

Smiling widely at your hokage, you body flickered back to the Nara compound, though instead of heading back towards your house, you slowly walked to the administration building located at the far end of the compound, right next to the medicine and research labs.

Entering the administration building you were welcomed with rough carpet floors and elderly Nara woman. She looked up from her sudoku book and nearly shrieked at your form.

“Ayumi-sama, what can we help you with today?”

“Ah I’ve come to fill out the necessary paperwork for new shinobi. Everything from life insurance to clan levys, if that wouldn’t be too much of a hassle for you.”

This was the part of becoming a shinobi no one spoke about, the endless paperwork. There were obvious pros and cons to belonging to a clan when becoming a shinobi. A pro of having a clan was the backing. Once you establish yourself as a loyal and splendid ninja you could try to obtain a higher military or political office and your clan would support you the entire way. 

The biggest con to having a clan would be the levy every shinobi has to pay. For every mission a ninja from the clan takes, 60% of the pay goes back to the clan in order to pay for weapons and medicine and other necessities. While in hindsight it doesn’t sound too bad, when you’re barely getting paid for D-rank missions the levy hits hard. 

“Don’t worry Ayumi-sama, it’s no hassle at all. Let me grab all of the paperwork from the back, please make yourself comfortable.”

Sitting on the plush couch in the corner of the room your mind wandered briefly before a prominent Nara clan elder walked into the building. Nara Enchū had been a Nara clan adviser since before your father was clan head. He started his career as a shinobi, building a reputation amongst the elemental nations before retiring from the field and becoming involved with politics. 

He had been one of your biggest supporters when you started learning politics three years ago, now however, you feared what he may say about your choice of lifestyle. 

Standing and bowing low to him you treated him as respectfully as you could. 

“Enchū-sama, it’s a pleasure to see you here today. How have you been?”

“... Ayumi-chan is that you? My, my you sure have grown since I last saw you! What could you possibly be doing here? You’ve become a genin?”

“Ah not yet Enchū-sama. I’ve decided to pursue my dream of becoming a splendid kunoichi of the Nara clan but have not yet accepted my hitai-ate. I received a genin team to test out the lifestyle, hence why I’m here. While I do not yet feel that I am mature enough to become a genin I do wish to serve my village with my skills.”

“But why? Your skills in diplomacy are unmatched by anyone, why would you give that up for the life of a ninja? You were going to bring honor to the Nara clan through politics.”

“Enchū-sama, I will bring honor to the Nara clan. Despite my choice of becoming a kunoichi, I’d like to stay involved with the political world. Diplomacy is second nature to me, just as shinobi skills are, I know I can prove myself in both. Please understand, honorable elder.”

You bowed deeply once again at the end of your tirade. It was quiet for a second, the only sound being the tick of the clock hanging on the wall across the entrance. A large hand on your head had you relaxing slightly.

“If you truly believe you are capable of maintaining a pristine reputation in both areas then I will support you. Keep in mind that it is your duty as the daughter of the clan head to become someone of worth. Seeing as you’ve already proven yourself to become a genin at such a young age, I’m guessing it won’t be too difficult for you to do Ayumi-chan. Deciding to hold off on your official hitai-ate until you deem yourself mature enough is a good sign as well. ”

“Thank you, honorable elder.”

“Of course. Oh and please don’t ever ruin your image like you have right now. You are a Nara, not an Uzumaki. Be proud of your dark hair.”

That was the last thing he said to you before disappearing behind a door labeled, “Archives”. 

_Oh I’ll have to see what that room contains later._

Before you could really plot anything else, the woman from before returned. In her arms were at least forty pages worth of documents you needed to read and sign. Sighing you settled yourself back into the couch and began reading. 

***

“Udon at point A.”

“Konohamaru at point B.”

“Ayumi at point C.”

“Moegi at point D.”

“Alright wait for my signal...Now!”

Jumping down from your perch on a tree branch, you and Konohamaru dove towards Tora, effectively trapping her in both your arms. Udon and Moegi let out loud yells of glee at the same time Tora began scratching your arms.

“Ahhh get it off before I kill it! Get it off, get it off! Ow ow fucking shit ow!”

“Ayumi-chan you must not use such language! As shinobi it is our duty to keep the peace and do the jobs civilians can’t do. A shinobi must always complete their tasks with a smile on their face.”

Ebisu gently removed the cat from you and Konohamaru while lecturing you on your language. You understood where he was coming from and actually agreed with it but Tora’s claws were as sharp as kunais and had drawn blood from your arms. 

“Sorry Ebisu-sensei, Tora’s claws are really good weapons.”

Before you could reach for your own ointment and bandages, Konohamaru was doing it for you. His fingers were gentle and nimble, he apologized softly when applying the ointment knowing it stung and offered a bright smile once he had finished. 

“Tora’s claws really dig into your skin when you catch her. I have plenty of experience applying ointment and bandage on my own arms so I thought I’d help you out kore!”

You blushed at his kind actions and words, he reminded you of Scott Lang. Scott had joined the Avengers during the year of the Sokovia Accords, he was a kind and goofy man who always puts his daughter’s safety and happiness above anything else.

Often when working with the Avengers, his protective fatherly side would emerge. If someone got hurt while training he was the first one to ask if you were okay, if you missed lunch or dinner he would make sure to bring you a snack or some sort of fast food item, and if he ever noticed your mood plummeting then he would do his absolute best to make you smile. His smile was contagious and you were now noticing that Konohamaru’s was too.

“Thank you, Konohamaru-kun. Please, let me help you with your own arms.”

Not allowing him time to react you returned the favor to your older teammate, smiling brightly. Once you were finished, Ebisu commended your actions, saying that a good shinobi will always look after their teammates. Moegi was wiggling her eyebrows at both you and Konohamaru and Udon was simply congratulating you both on catching Tora so quickly. 

Making your way towards the Hokage tower you fell into easy conversation with your three teammates, sometimes you would say something blatantly outlandish just to get Ebisu to chime into the conversation. You had been with team Ebisu for about five weeks now, while you definitely hated how boring D-rank missions were you couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to do them with. 

Watching the devil cat get squeezed by its owner gave you pleasure unlike any other causing you to smile brightly. One you receive your pay you were free to do as you pleased, the team had already completed their three D-rank missions for the day. Just before you could turn to say goodbye to your friends a gentle voice called your name. Smiling gently at you was Umino Iruka, Shikamaru’s academy teacher. He was sitting behind the missions desk and motioning you to come closer. Bidding your friends goodbye you watched them leave the room before timidly approaching. 

“Iruka-san, you wished to speak with me?”

“Mah Ayumi-chan, you don’t need to be so formal with me. You can call me Iruka-sensei, just like your brother.”

“Very well Iruka-sensei, what can I do for you?”

At your question the tan man began to lightly scratch his scar, a light blush coating his cheeks and ears.

“Ah you see, I wasn’t on board with Hokage-sama letting you become a genin. I know you declined the offer but you’re only four years old, you haven’t attended the academy nor had enough time to enjoy your childhood like you should have. Nonetheless I respect Hokage-sama’s decision and just wanted to make sure you were doing okay.”

Now that’s something you weren’t expecting.

“Ehh Iruka-sensei, you never had me as a student. Why would my well being be of concern to you?”

“Just because you didn’t attend the academy doesn’t mean I stop caring about your mental health Ayumi-chan. Being a ninja is hard, I know doing D-rank missions doesn’t really show that but once you start taking higher rank missions you’ll understand. Those higher rank missions can easily affect your emotions and mental state, especially since you’re so young. I just want you to know that even if we don’t have that student-teacher bond, I will always be open to you. No matter what happens I will always offer you a shoulder to cry on or advice.”

Your eyes teared up at the sincerity in Iruka’s voice, you now understood why your brother always spoke so highly of him. 

“Thank you sensei, for concerning yourself with me. Should I ever find myself questioning my morals and ambitions you’ll be the first one I speak to.”

At your words the man blushed darker and patted you on your head. Just before you left the mission room you turned to the chunin and gifted him a sincere bright smile.

“You’re a kind man, Iruka-sensei. Naruto-kun is lucky to have you in his life.”

And then you left.

***

February 8th at exactly 11:45 at night you woke to a sickening premonition from Suna. You wracked your mind for any event you may have dreamed of until you jolted at a certain one. Gaara, Godaime Kazekage and jinchuriki to the one tail, would be getting kidnapped and killed by the Akatsuki. More specifically, Deidara would be kidnapping Gaara while Sasori poisoned Kankuro with a poison refined with heavy metals which would get into the muscles and destroy the cells. If left untreated the victim would die within three days. Shukaku would get extracted by the Akatsuki and sealed into a big statue, killing Gaara in the process. 

Throwing off your covers, you ran into the living room where your father and brother were playing shogi. Ignoring both men you frantically started strapping on your sandals, provoking both men to question you. 

“Whoa whoa whoa sweetheart, what are you doing out of bed? It’s way past your bedtime right now.”

Knowing that now wasn’t the time for your petty acts you made eye contact with your father and spoke to him.

“I need to see the Hokage right now. I’ve just remembered something and she needs to know about it now.”

“Imouto odds are Hokage-sama is already at her home resting. Just wait until tomorrow morning, I can take you along with the rest of team 10 and Suna’s ambassador.”

“No I have to leave right now, I’ll see you both when I return.”

Tsunade’s chakra led you right to the hokage tower, you all but flew up the stairs into the building. The guards knew you were one of Tsunade’s favorite students so they allowed you through but not without throwing questioning looks at your pajama clad form. You paid no attention to their stares, you had to make it to her office before the lead in Suna was lost. 

Not bothering to double check if there were any other chakra signatures coming from the office you threw open the doors only to stop dead in your tracks and almost puke. 

Tsunade was indeed in her office, bent over her desk even. But she was not doing paperwork. She was wearing her official hokage robes but her breasts were hanging loose and the bottom of the robes were hiked above her hips. Positioned behind her was the sanin you believed to have been out of fire country, penis halfway buried within the hokage. Both adults let out shouts of embarrassment and frustration at being interrupted but you did not leave. Instead you quickly turned your head and locked the doors. 

“Stop fornicating and just listen to what I have to say! Suna is in trouble. The Kazekage has just been kidnapped by the Akatsuki and one of his advisors has been poisoned with a poison that will kill him in three days time. You need to send me and a team to Suna now, before the Akatsuki even has a chance at extracting the one tail from Gaara.”

You heard both adults sigh and clothes being shifted, still you refused to turn your head back around until they told you to. 

_Really? Shishou and the pervert? And here I thought she had standards._

“Alright gaki, you can turn around now.”

You turned slowly and felt a powerful blush spread across your face, it made you happy that your shishou was enjoying herself but you really wish you hadn’t seen it. You also wondered how Jiraiya was able to hide such a massive bulge from his usual attire.

_He had to have been at least 7 inches and the girth, oh fuck. Wait he’s like fifty ew. Then again, I guess I'm nearing my forty’s so-_

“Gaki! Are you listening to me?! Tell me who from the Akatsuki has kidnapped the Kazekage.”

“Deidara, S-rank missing nin from Iwagakure. He possesses the Explosion kekkei genkai making bombs out of a special clay. He has two additional mouths, one on his left palm and on his chest right where his heart would be. He uses these mouths to mold explosive chakra into his clay, making explosive figurines. He is significantly weak against lightning though his pain tolerance is almost unbelievable. Sasori, S-rank missing nin from Sunagakure. He is a master puppeteer, perfecting his craft to the point of turning himself into a puppet. He can effectively use up to 100 puppets and poison anyone within a 100 meter range. His only weakness would be a cylindrical piece of his original flesh located where his heart would be. If you can manage to destroy that then he no longer will live. He has a backup body in case the one he is in gets too damaged.” 

Once finished you waited for both sanin to process the information. It was Jiraiya who spoke first.

“You said they were going to extract the one tail, how exactly?”

“All members of the Akatsuki are expected to give about 30% of their chakra to engage in a sealing. With all nine members present the jutsu takes three days to complete. I don’t know what fuinjutsu they use though it manifests itself as blue dragons. The dragons latch onto the jinchuriki and extracts the bijuu forcefully, taking such a large amount of chakra from anyone would kill them. Once the fuinjutsu is complete the jinchuriki dies.” 

Jiraiya turns a pensive stare towards his lover, the information you provided was more than he could have ever dreamed of attaining. However, this also meant that the Kazekage was in quite a predicament, if he died it would be detrimental to everyone. Tsunade was fiddling her thumbs as she thought, speaking up only to question:

“You said you had to go to Suna as well, why? We cannot afford to lose you to the enemy.”

You knew that logically he was right, you were an information goldmine that could save hundreds of shinobi and keep Konoha from being destroyed again. The most optimal solution would be to keep you in the village with an anbu guard, protected at all cost. Yet you couldn’t shake the feeling that you needed to go with whatever team was sent to Suna. the need to go almost hurt you physically. 

“I know you want me to stay in the village, being protected all day everyday but I don’t want to live that way. I want to live my life however I want, even if it kills me. Neither of you get to make that decision for me.” 

“Technically I’m the Hokage, I can do whatever I want with you brat. If keeping this information safe means locking you up then I will do so. Do not test me.”

A wave of shock and dread ran through your body because you knew your shishou would definitely keep her word. At the same time you felt foolish, of course the hokage would chain you up if it meant keeping her village safe. 

“I can keep myself safe, I’ve been training hard. You deemed me worthy of being a Konoha shinobi, let me do my job and protect this village and its allies. Please shishou, I can do this. I need to do this.”

“And if I don’t let you go?”

At this question you really faltered. You had no upper hand in this conversation, you really believed that if you asked to be sent to Suna then you would be. Your ninjutsu, taijutsu and genjutsu were as good as any chunin but the fact of the matter was that you were still a genin. Tsunade had every right to keep you from going to Suna. 

“Please shishou, I know I can do this. Trust me, let me prove my ninja way to you both.”

At your last plea you fall to your knees and bowed deeply, hoping that showing utmost respect would help sway Tsunade in your favor. 

For a long while there was silence, Jiraiya was uncharacteristically silent and serious while Tsunade had her head buried within her hands. The silence was tense and drawn out for the better half of 5 minutes before Tsunade let out a long and loud groan. 

“Ayumi-chan, I sincerely hope you know what you’re getting yourself into. I will not let the team I send baby you, you wish to be a genin of Konohagakure so you better act like one. The only order I will give to them in regards to you will be to not let you die at any cost. If one of them dies protecting you, then that is on you. Understand?”

A quick nod and she sent Jiraiya out to collect team 7, leaving the two of you alone. 

“Gaki, I’m putting my trust in you. Just tell me this, why are you so dead set on risking your life for this?”

Not wasting a second you told her your truthful response. 

“If what I dreamed is true then people will die on his mission. Good and bad people. What good is this power if I can’t use it to save them.”

Shishou didn’t question you further after that. 

***

“Team 7 will leave for Suna in exactly 30 minutes, you will be taking my apprentice Nara Ayumi as well. Despite her lack of official ninja status, she has incredible skills with ninjutsu and taijutsu, her medical ninjutsu is on par or possibly superior to my other apprentice Sakura so you need not worry. She is aware of the details pertaining to this mission, she will disclose them to you all when she sees fit. From the start of this mission to the very end you all will protect Ayumi-chan with your life, under no circumstances can she fall into the enemy’s hands or get injured. Understood?”

“By your command Hokage-sama.”

“By your command Hokage-sama.”

“By your command Hokage-sama, though I cannot see how taking an inexperienced, weak child will do anything other than inhibit us during this mission.”

You tensed at Kakashi’s words, indignation and anger willed your small body. Kakashi knew you were capable of completely decking Naruto and Sakura, he was there when you sparred against them, so why was he saying you were weak? 

“That is why you are not the Hokage, Hatake-san. If you wish to continue questioning my ability to make decisions then I’m sure the academy would love a new grade 1 instructor.”

At that all three members of team 7 stood straight and silent, you were standing next to Tsunade. Once all of team 7 had begun to shuffle out to get their supplies you were engulfed in a strong, tight hug. Tsunade was squishing your innards out of you but you couldn’t bring yourself to complain. While she was caring to Sakura and Shizune, she only cuddled with you. Instead you stayed quiet and released in the warm embrace. When she let go you turned to her and were genuinely surprised to see wetness around her eyes. Before you could ask what was wrong she spoke.

“Gaki, please be careful. Don’t throw yourself into unnecessary danger, come back to me alive, please.”

You felt your own eyes become damp at her plea and nodded vigorously. Throwing yourself into her arms once again you memorized her scent and touch, if the mission went haywire and you ended up in a dire situation then you wanted to be able to recall your second mother’s love and care. Releasing the hug minutes later you kissed her cheek before dashing out of her office. 

Racing back to the compound to pack you were giddy with excitement, this would be the first time you went out of the village. In the four years of life you had lived so far, not once have you ever even stepped foot out of the large red gates. Anytime you asked your family they would quickly brush you off and try to distract you. Now, however, they couldn’t. You were working on orders from the Hokage, they couldn’t do anything to stop you from leaving. 

Opening the front door to your house, you were mildly surprised to see that your entire family was waiting for you, even Ensui was there and he did not look happy. Before any of them could sscold you, you spoke loud and clear. 

“I have an out of village mission, I need to go pack. Team Kakashi and I leave in about twenty five minutes.”

And just like that everyone’s anger dissipated as they began following you to pack and asking questions.

“What do you mean you leave in twenty five minutes? It’s barely 1 am, can’t you leave later in the day? Also you aren’t a shinobi, you’re not qualified for missions yet.”

“No mother, Tsunade-sama has ordered us to leave immediately. These are the hokage’s orders, who am I to question them?”

“But where are you going? You’re still a child, you shouldn’t be taking out of village missions yet!”

“Suna. They’re Hokage’s orders mother, I can’t ignore them.”

“But, but, but you’re so young. So many things could go wrong, who’s going to take care of you?!”

“I can take care of myself, and if not then I trust team Kakashi will have my back.”

“Team Kakashi huh? Well I guess that explains why he was in such a big hurry tonight.”

“Yes Ensui-san, I’m sorry the mission cut into your private time with Kakashi-san. If all goes well then we should be back within a week. Shikaku-san, would it be at all possible to borrow two wakizashi from the weapons vault? I’m still too short to properly use katanas and tanto blades feel too small for my personal taste.”

There was a stunned silence as you finished packing your backpack, turning around you took note of the deep blush covering your uncle’s face and the look of shock crossing your father’s. 

“Is everything alright?”

Shaking his head, your father agreed to let you take two wakizashi from the weapons vault, telling you to follow him. 

“Actually I was hoping you could get them while I changed into my uniform, I am on a time crunch.”

“Of course my little shadow, I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

And then he left, leaving you in a room with your older brother, mother and uncle. You took out a standard shinobi uniform and began fiddling with the hem of your pajama shirt, shooting a look towards the other shinobi in your room. 

“Ugh, can you guys, like, leave? I don’t really want to give you guys a show, there’s not much for me to flaunt anyways.”

Your brother and your uncle blushed while your mother griped you about making perverted jokes at such a young age. You chuckled softly at them before closing your door and proceeding to change. You made sure to clean up nicely despite the fact that you would most likely get dirty, the etiquette your mother had drilled into you from an early age still affected the way you acted. Braiding a section of your hair into a high ponytail made you still for a moment, this was the first time you would be actively trying to change the future you had seen. One misstep and you could cause a plethora of problems. Could you deal with that? 

Shaking off your doubts and fears you finished with your hair before grabbing your backpack and running down the stairs. Waiting for you by the back door was your family, your father had the two blades in his hands, your uncle was scribbling something on a scroll, your brother was staring blankly at the wall and your mother was frantically packing a mountain of food into bento boxes.

“Mom, you know I can’t really fit all of that food into my backpack.”

“What do you think your uncle is working on sweetpea? He’s making a special sealing scroll to seal all of this food into, that way you’ll only be carrying around a scroll rather than a dozen bento boxes.”

Your eyes widened at your mother’s words as you scurried closer to your uncle. Observing the scroll he was inking up you recognized a few of the characters but not all of them. Puffing out your cheeks in frustration at your ignorance you made a mental note to study fuinjutsu when you get back. 

“Ensui-san, you’re going to have to teach me how to make a sealing scroll when I get back. It would make packing for missions so much easier.”

“Yeah, yeah kid you got it. And please just go back to calling me ojisan, Ensui-san makes me feel like a stranger.”

Ignoring his request you turned to your father and thanked him for retrieving the blades. You strapped both blades onto your back in an “X” formation, feeling like Leonardo from the ninja turtles. You practiced unsheathing and resheathing the blades while your uncle sealed the mountain of bento boxes your mother had prepared and organized your backpack neatly. As your uncle worked he spoke.

“Alright Ayumi-chan looks like you're all set for your first out of village mission. Are you excited?”

“I’m anxious.”

Your brother abruptly walked off into his room at your response. You didn’t think much of it, neither did your uncle. 

“Ah that’s normal, you’ll adjust soon enough. Plus I know Kakashi won’t let shit happen to you, so you don’t have to worry about your safety.”

“I’m not anxious about my own health, I can damn well keep myself safe. I just hope I can keep the rest of my team safe as well, I don’t want to be a burden.”

Your family turned to you, each having varying levels of concern on their faces at your response. Before anyone could speak, however, your brother reentered the room. In his hands was an old worn shirt with the clan crest in the back. Your brother knelt in front of you and gently unstrapped the two blades on your back. 

“Aniki, what are you doing? I have to leave soon.”

His eyes were glassy as he guided your body into the shirt, it was a bit too large for you but didn’t obstruct your movement in the slightest. It reminded you a bit of Tsunade’s green overcoat. Watching your brother finish adjusting the open shirt on your shoulders, you were shocked to see his eyes filled with tears.

“Aniki, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

“Imouto, this was the shirt I used when I was a genin almost six years ago. It kept me safe during the chunin exams and even on my own first out of village mission. I meant to give it to you as a graduation gift once you were twelve but you just keep surpassing anyone's expectations of you, don’t you? It’s a bit big and kinda smelly but hopefully it reminds you that you have a home and a family waiting for you.”

You couldn’t form words after hearing your brother speak. You couldn’t even really think clearly, when had anyone given you such a meaningful gift? You bit your lip harshly when you felt the sting of tears behind your eyes. You threw yourself at Shikamaru, allowing a few tears to dampen his shoulder. He held you against him tightly, as if this was the last time he would see you. After a few seconds you squirmed until he let go and hastily wiped your eyes. 

_“No matter the situation, a shinobi must never show emotion. You must make the mission your top priority, and you must possess a heart that never shows tears.” pfft yeah good luck with that bullshit._

“I’ll come back aniki, you guys can’t get rid of me that easily. When I do come back we should definitely try to wash this shirt thoroughly, it does smell like sweat and… barbeque?”

Your family broke into jolly laughter at your last statement, helping you restrap the two wakizashi blades in place and your backpack before setting out into the night. You walked with your hand holding your brothers, your mother on your free side and your father and uncle trailing a bit behind the group whispering to each other. 

Team Kakashi was already waiting at the village gate, Sakura sent you a dirty look while the other two males simply greeted you and your family. Before setting out, your mother plucked you off the ground and hugged you tightly to her chest. You were vaguely aware of your brother moving closer to team 7 and speaking to them in a low voice but didn’t pay it any more attention. Your mother professed her love for you once more before letting your father say his piece. 

“Ayumi-chan, you have been such a blessing to our lives since the moment we found out you were in your mother’s tummy. I know I’ve been a rotten father to you but I sincerely hope you know how much you mean to me. You have made me so proud, my little shadow. Stay close to Kakashi-san, Uzumaki-san, and Haruno-san. Come back safely.”

With his speech said he kissed you on your cheeks, nose and forehead before hugging you firmly. You let him. Despite still being a bit upset over the events that had transpired weeks ago, you were slowly warming up to him again. 

He was roughly pushed away by your uncle who knelt before you and animatedly talked about your start as a kick ass kunoichi. Once finished, he too hugged you tightly and then pushed you closer to team Kakashi. Turning towards the team you noticed your brother had finished talking to them and was waiting for you. You quickly ran to him and nuzzled his shoulder when he lifted you. You whispered a simple ‘I love you Shika-nii’ into his ear before he whispered it back to you and set you down. 

Walking towards team Kakashi you bowed deeply and politely delivered quick greetings and appreciation for allowing you to join them. They all dismissed your appreciation and Naruto even joked about stealing Shikamaru’s imouto and making you his own. 

As the four of you made your way down the dirt road you quickly turned your head to catch one last glimpse of your family. They were all huddled together, when they saw you turn they all waved their hands wildly in a wacky gesture of goodbye. You wanted to laugh and cry and jump in excitement all at once. This was the beginning of your long journey of keeping the world from falling to shit, everything could either go as planned or you could end up dead. 

Whichever it may be, you were ready.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This 10k update is dedicated to SecondGuessing here on AO3, they left a very precious comment on the prior chapter that inspired me to finish this chapter last night! This one's for you bby! 
> 
> Thank you for any comments!


	10. 先 (Destination)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Onwards to Suna ft Ayumi is a bitch. ( I swear it's crucial to the story please don't kill me, I love Kakashi )

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not gonna lie, I really don't like this chapter. I don't know what possessed me to write this entire story in the second person but I really hate that I did. I know second person writing it a big no-no and rereading old chapters just makes me want to kms so maybe in the future I'll go back and rewrite the entire thing in either first person or third person omniscient. WHo KnOwS

For the first hour or so the team walked at your pace, gradually becoming more ansty for faster movement. You knew they were going slow for your sake but it really wasn’t necessary. You spoke loud enough to be heard. 

“Thank you for trying to keep the pace slow for my sake but we need to make it to Suna as quick as possible. If we push constantly for the next day then we can make it by midday tomorrow. Don’t worry about chakra drain, I can make sure you get back everything you lose with a special ration pill shishou and I came up with.” 

For a moment no one spoke, Sakura seemed a bit upset but quickly schooled her features to show indifference. Kakashi was the one who broke the silence. 

“Mahh chibi-chan, if we push that hard then you’re going to be left behind. Besides there is no rush to make it to Suna, so we can walk.”

“Actually you’re wrong Kakashi-nii, Suna just went to shit a few hours ago so we are pressed for time. I can definitely keep up with you buffoons, maybe even beat you there. I’ll tell you the details later but for now you can either keep up or explain to the Hokage how you lost her apprentice.”

With that you leapt up into the trees and set a brutal pace towards Suna. It would take Sasori and Deidara up until around midday before they make it to the designated hideout, but then three more days to kill Gaara. There was no way you all would make it before the extraction started but you could make it before it ended. 

You felt three chakra signatures falling close behind you, you didn’t turn to acknowledge them though. If they wanted to belittle the blood, sweat, and tears you and Danzo-sensei shed to make you into the ultimate child soldier then they could go back to Konoha. 

For the next 13 hours no one spoke, only the sound of harsh breathing and feet meeting wood was heard. 

***

“The Akatsuki has made their move in Suna, they’ve kidnapped the Kazekage and plan to extract the bijuu from him. In the process they’ve killed many of their shinobi and poisoned Kankuro-san. We need to get to Gaara-sama before they finish extracting Shukaku otherwise the Kazekage will die. Sasori of the Red Sand and Deidara of Iwa are the two Akatsuki members we will be dealing with, a cheap imitation of Hoshigaki Kisame may appear but he’ll be dealt with. Sasori has a weak spot located where his heart would be, a cylinder of rotted flesh is your target. He fights through puppetry, though his taijutsu isn’t too shabby either. Deidara is weak against lightning, he mainly utilizes an Iwa kinjutsu which gives him two extra mouths on his body. One is one his palm and the other is on his chest, they let him chew large amounts of clay to make explosives. ”

Immediately upon finishing your small speech Naruto jumped and began to panic. He seemed to be in denial that someone as powerful as Gaara could get captured, even going as far as to threaten you with violence for making such bad jokes. In response to his rising anger you activated your chakra scalpels, if push came to shove then you would be the one to come out on top. 

Sakura smacked Naruto with enough force to give him a concussion at the same time as Kakashi made gestures for you to calm down. It became obvious that there was a lack of respect directed towards you from all three shinobi. They only saw you as a burden in this mission, someone who would bring them down and get in their way. Unmitigated fury filled you and you wanted nothing more than to prove them wrong, so you would. 

“Maah maah chibi-chan, we don’t usually direct attacks towards our teammates. If you are going to be a part of our team for this mission then we need to all get along.”

“Keep your dog on a leash then Hatake. My age does not dictate my skill and I’m more than willing to prove that.”

“Ayumi-chan, you lack the experience of a seasoned shinobi to be of real help. You will probably freeze up if real danger arises.”

“Is that your professional opinion Hatake?”

“It is.”

“Then let me tell you this, I am strong. I have proven my strength time and time again. I learned your signature move, one you only ever taught to a certain Uchiha. I built upon it, made it my own. You believed Uchiha Sasuke could become a splendid ninja and yet look at how he turned out. Frankly speaking, your professional opinion on others means less than dog shit to me.” 

Knowing your words would hurt the jounin deeply you turned away, not trusting yourself to be able to hide the regret on your face. Quickly taking off back into the trees, for a minute the three shinobi did not follow, you were ready to just leave them and continue on your own but sure enough three signatures popped up and followed some distance from you. 

So far the trip to Suna was as bad as you had feared, clearly there was a rift between you and team 7 but you couldn’t bring yourself to fix it. If they wanted to belittle you then you would simply prove them wrong. 

***

Being ushered into the hospital by a shaken Baki had quelled any lingering hurt and anger from the earlier confrontation with team 7. He was summarizing everything that had happened within the last 36 hours while doctors were shouting about the poison slowly killing Kankuro. Once Baki had finished you asked him to bring you to Kankuro, he was a bit confused but after Kakashi had informed him of your apprenticeship and quaint prowess in medical ninjutsu, he complied. 

It was obvious that although Kankuro was unconscious, he was in a world of pain. Given your unique insight to the poison used you were quickly able to run a simple diagnostic jutsu and then write down a list of ingredients you would need. Baki was completely on board with allowing you to take command and barked at the nurses and doctors to get everything on the list immediately. 

In another timeline team 7 would not have arrived as early and Sakura would have had to use a more crude and painful method to save Kankuro’s life. Now, however, you had at least another day and a half before Kankuro would succumb to the poison, meaning that he could take the medicine in a much less painful manner. 

Using the herbs and a special chakra powder you had brought along you began the process of creating the antidote. Team 7 and Baki were watching you with curious eyes and peaked interest but you paid them no attention. 45 minutes later you had ten vials of the antidote ready, it would both neutralize any existing poison in your system as well as fortify your immune system to withstand and eventually become immune to the poison. 

Jumping down from a stool provided to you by the medical staff you shuffled past the watching crowd and climbed onto the stool next to Kankuro’s bed. Holding a green palm up to his forehead you watched as his eyes flew open and he tried to sit up. You quickly motioned for the room to be quiet as you snapped your fingers close to his ears and softly asked him to follow your glowing finger with his eyes. When he complied you softly asked him to recount the events he could remember, this would tell you if he had any sort of brain trauma. 

As Kankuro recounted the events leading to his poisoning you filled a syringe with the antidote. Nodding along and adding commentary to his story helped keep him distracted from the rather long needle you were about to insert into his brachial artery. Quietly you asked him to take a deep breath and then in one swift smooth movement you inserted the needle and attached the pack of medication. Kankuro’s face did scrunch up when it happened but he was genuinely surprised to know that you had inserted a needle into him, joking that it felt like an ant bite. Smiling you informed him that he may feel sleepy but that was just a result of the medication doing it’s job. 

“Kankuro-san I can assure you that we will do everything in our power to get the Kazekage back. We will not fail you. Now you need to rest and make sure you’re in the best condition possible to welcome back your brother.”

“I understand Sensei, thank you for coming on such short notice and saving my life. Ah, wait! Here this is something I was able to snag before they got away. It could help you track them.”

Kankuro handed you a small piece of cloth and relaxed back into the bed. You gave him one last gentle smile before moving back to team Kakashi and Baki. 

“Kankuro-san will make a full recovery, he must be put on a liquid diet until we return from our mission to rescue the Kazekage. If he develops any signs of a fever then please administer this antibiotic. Team 7, please allow me to administer the antidote to the poison before we head out. It will make you immune to Sasori’s poison.”

Swiftly injecting the three shinobi and then yourself you began to prepare for the mission. Removing your scrubs and making sure the nurses knew what to expect from Kankuro, you worked quickly and diligently. Once your wakizashis were in place you turned to the waiting shinobi. Nobody made any move to stop you from going, maybe they had finally recognized your skill. Regardless you kept your expression indifferent, trying to tame the swell of excitement bubble inside of you. You would finally get to experience real combat. 

As team Kakashi and you followed Baki towards the outskirts of the village you put your teachings to work. Baki was completely flabbergasted by your skill and maturity. You were able to assess the situation and develop an antidote and antibiotics in less than an hour when the entire medical staff had spent a day and a half racking their brains for any possible solution. 

“Before I was offered the chance of becoming a genin, I dedicated a large portion of my days to study as many different forms of chakra manipulation as I could. I wanted to be well rounded in the shinobi arts, not simply focused on a single branch. Hokakge-sama saw potential in me, that’s why she offered me an apprenticeship. It really was through her guidance and patience that I became who I am today.”

“But you’re so young, Nara-san. I understand Shikaku-san had a genius son but even then, he waited to graduate from the academy at the age of twelve. Why are you so driven to grow up before your time?”

“I was born very sick, Baki-san. My heart is barely functioning at the moment, any wrong fluctuation of my chakra could send me into cardiac arrest. My parents solution to my problem was to dictate my life, I would study politics, become involved in them, marry a suitor my clan picked out and live a long stress free life. And for a while I allowed them to believe that. I picked up diplomacy as if it were second nature and even know I thoroughly enjoy the practice of politics but that wasn’t the type of life I wanted to live. I knew that my heart could stop at any time regardless of my lifestyle so I chose to defy my family and train to be a shinobi.”

“But why? What’s your motivation?”

Throughout your conversation with Baki you knew Kakashi had been listening. At Baki’s question, Kakashi leaned a bit closer to the two of you. You went silent for a while, trying to piece together a way to say the truth without revealing too much. 

“When you can do the things that I can, but you don’t, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you.” 

Your response must not have been what Baki or Kakashi expected because they both jerked and then promptly settled into a pensive quietness until the group reached the canyon separating the village from the desert. Baki expressed his deepest gratitude and assured your group that backup would be coming within the next day or so. With that you all set out, led by Kakashi’s pack. 

Three hours of sprinting later you had arrived at the sealed entrance of the hideout. Pressing close to the boulder you were able to feel the strong chakra of Deidara and Sasori, diluted chakra of seven other people was also evident but too faint to be of real concern. Kakashi began to speak before you could further analyze the chakra. 

“Ah yes, they’ve sealed the entrance. Lemme see...mmhmm just as I suspected. I have no idea what this seal means!”

“Don’t worry Kakashi-sensei, I can just punch my way through this boulder and we can bypass the seal altogether.”

Sakura had on a face of arrogance as she adjusted her gloves, it was true she definitely could oneshot that boulder. The only problem was that -if you were reading and interpreting the seal correctly- on destruction of the seal, a self destruct sequence would obliterate everything within a 500 meter radius. 

The three began to discuss battle plans and different routes to take while you kept your attention on the seal. A few minutes passed before you finally deciphered what type of seal it was. At first glass it appeared as a protection seal, if tampered with a protective aura would be released, but upon further inspection it was exactly like the one your father used for his study, only mixed with an explosive tag. 

“If we don’t dismantle this seal, and just decide to destroy the boulder we could potentially blow up this entire mountain. The seal is rigged to four other locations, if this one is tampered with then it will cause something within the other four locations. I’m pretty sure I can bypass the seal without triggering anything though. I just need time and for you guys to be ready for any kind of combat that awaits us inside.”

You wanted to bang your head against the wall until you bled because once you realized what kind of seal it was it felt obvious. Flexing your chakra slowly you navigated the locking mechanism, everytime you unlocked one part a small burst of chakra would catch your attention from the surrounding area. You weren’t sure how much time had passed since you began unsealing the hideout but by the end of it you were ashamed. Danzo-sensei had been training you in the art of seals but it seemed you still had a lot to learn. 

Stepping back to allow Sakura to do her thing you felt eyes on you. Turning you caught Kakashi’s curious gaze, slowly he moved closer to you and crouched to be face to face with you. 

“Maah chibi-chan, where’d you learn that cool trick? Nevermind you can answer that later, now when that boulder comes down you are going to take cover somewhere around here and you will not interfere with anything. Your safety is also our priority so we can’t afford to get you hurt. Just wait out here until we come get you okay?”

“What the hell? No! I’m strong just like you so I will fight alongside you.”

“That’s not your call to make Ayumi-chan. I am the commanding officer and I’m or-”

“Bullshit! You of all people should know that I’m more than capable of holding my own in a fight!”

“Nara Ayumi! As your commanding officer I am ordering you to not engage in any form of combat. You don’t have the experience to fight and your body is too weak to be anything more than a liability. You are a liability and I do not agree with Tsunade-sama assigning you to this mission.” 

You had no chance to argue back because just as he finished talking the boulder exploded. Team 7 all rushed into the cave and you desperately wanted to go in as well. Weighing the pros and cons you ultimately decided to stay put and listen to Kakashi’s orders, he was your superior after all. Walking back towards a tree that allowed you to see into the cave you settled and observed. 

Naruto was shouting about hurting his best friend, four of his shadow clones were protectively surrounding an unconscious Gaara and creating rasengans to destroy some of Sasori’s puppets. Kakashi and Sakura were dodging Deidara’s clay explosives, unable to get close to him. You knew it was only a matter of time before he created his giant clay bird and flew out of their range.

As you stayed sitting on the branch of the tree you replayed Kakashi’s words to you. 

_A liability, a fucking liability, that’s what he sees me as. How? Why? I’ve done nothing but train for this moment. He’s seen firsthand my abilities...does he really think so lowly of me? If this plays out the way I think it will then Sakura is going to die. Chiyo isn’t here to help her counter Sasori’s puppets. She won’t even stand a chance._

Forty five minutes later and Sakura had been left to battle Sasori on her own while Naruto and Kakashi tailed Deidara who held an unconscious Kazekage with him. You would have chased Deidara but you knew Sakura would need your help soon. You moved towards the mouth of the cave and observed the battle.

Sakura was already in bad shape, multiple cuts and bruises were left on her body as evidence of Sasori’s true prowess in puppetry. However, there were about forty broken puppet bodies on the floor, evidence of Sakura's unshakable will and determination to beat her opponent. 

It really was amazing to watch her thin body move so smoothly and then deliver devastating punches without wincing in pain. You were hypnotized by their moves, so graceful in fact that they seemed to almost be dancing with each other. 

_This is how true shinobi fight. Beautiful._

You didn’t have time to admire the scene anymore because Sasori managed to completely cut through both of Sakura Achilles tendons. You watched in horror as she let out a gasp of shock and pain, falling to the ground. The puppet man began to taunt her before he unsheathed two long blades and diving towards Sakura’s prone body. 

_He’s going to kill her oh my god he’s going to kill her._

At that moment you felt all reason leave your body. 

***

Sakura was going to die, from the moment she told Kakashi-sensei and Naruto that she could take Sasori on her own she knew she was going to have trouble but never like this. She wasn’t going to be able to hug her parents anymore, she wasn’t going to be able to compete with Ino, she wasn’t going to grow old and have kids and get married, and she wasn’t going to be able to save Sasuke-kun because she had underestimated the strength of an S-rank missing nin. 

Sasori had already severed her Achillies heel and she didn’t have enough chakra or time to heal them. He unsheathed two long blades and dove for her. Sakura blinked back tears and prayed to any god who would hear her for strength. Instead of feeling pain she felt ...nothing. Metal clashing with metal was all that was heard as she lifted her head. Her eyes widened at the scene that welcomed her instead of her death. 

Nara Ayumi was her shishou’s newest apprentice and from what she had heard she was exceptional in and outside the medical field. Her skills were so quaint that whispers and murmurs of her being a prodigy were heard everywhere Sakura went. It made her feel inadequate in her skills to hear such things and then seeing her shishou praising and cuddling the young girl made the feeling inside of her morph into something more malicious. 

It was after Sakura’s shishou had introduced Nara Ayumi to Jiraiya-sama and Naruto as her daughter that she actively started trying to sabotage her growth. If Tsunade or Shizune asked Sakura to pass on a message to Ayumi she wouldn’t, she would actively give Ayumi the wrong directions and procedures in hopes of ruining her blossoming reputation as the youngest nurse practitioner in all of Fire country. 

If anyone had anything bad to say about Ayumi then Sakura would be quick to affirm them, if malicious rumors were spread then Sakura would do her part in confirming them and spreading them to others. It was vile and petty, Sakura knew that. But this little child had swooped in and stolen her spotlight and affection from her shishou. Not even five years old and already Nara Ayumi was hailed as the next Tsunade, something absolutely ridiculous in Sakura’s opinion. 

There was no doubt in her mind that Ayumi knew she was not fond of her. She never acted like the older sister she was supposed to be. In fact Ayumi had even caught Sakura spreading a malicious rumor about her. She hadn’t said anything or made any movement towards Sakura. Instead she turned around and walked away, never telling anyone as far as Sakura was aware of. 

Given those pretenses Nara Ayumi was the last person Sakura expected to save her life. Yet here she was, two wakizashis, one in each hand, deflecting the two blades Sasori had intended to decapitate her. Her chakra was unusually calm and her facial expression matched that of a seasoned kunoichi despite her young age and inexperience. 

Ayumi managed to push Sasori back and took a defensive stance in front of Sakura. She eyed Sasori and the last sixty puppets floating around him and decided that attacking head on would be best. She dodged every projective Sasori through her way and engulfed her blades in chakra to cut the chakra strings attached to a large sum of his puppets. She managed to drag the fight away from Sakura before speaking.

“Akasuna no Sasori, I know you believe you’re fighting for a worthy organization but you’re wrong. The Akatsuki is simply a stepping stone for a much larger malicious force. You’re being used as a pawn, whether you live or die doesn’t matter.”

“Who are you to speak to me in such a way? You’re nothing but a child, not even worthy of joining my collection.”

At that the two engaged in battle again. Sasori was unforgiving in his offensive maneuvers, his puppets moved as if they were alive. Ayumi was quick with her blades, easily using them to deflect projectiles and cut through the chakra strings holding up Sasori’s puppets. When she would lose a blade she wouldn’t hesitate to change into taijutsu or ninjutsu. She would manage to fight using those until she drew closer to her lost blade and then switch back to kenjutsu. 

Sakura was flabbergasted. Ayumi fought like a vetren kunoichi in the sense that she had confidence in her body to move the way she desired it to, but she also used movements not familiar to Sakura. Sasori was also thrown off by her distinctive taijutsu, not being able to guess her movements. 

“I know you wish to bring everlasting beauty to this world, that’s why you dedicate so much time and effort into your puppets. They are art, art that everyone should appreciate. If you’re with the Akatsuki then your art will be forever lost, please believe me!”

“What do you know about everlasting beauty? You’re a mere child, you know not what the Akatsuki means. We will bring peace to the shinobi world, so no child ever has to live life without their parents.”

“Then let me show you, please just let me show you. I know you hate waiting because as a child you waited for your parents to return from a mission. They never came back because the White Fang Hatake Sakumo killed them! I know you made your closest childhood friend into a puppet, that was your first human made puppet and you still cherish him!’’

“H-how do you know all of this?! Tell me!”

“I can’t tell you, not here. I need your sworn word that you will leave the Akatsuki and I need my Hokage’s permission before I divulge anything else. Please, Sasori-san. I don’t want to kill you.”

At Ayumi’s response Sasori let out a loud laugh and began mocking her. Instead of responding to Sasori, Ayumi turned back to Sakura.

“Sakura-san, try to heal your wounds as much as possible. I have a feeling we’ll be dealing with his partner in a while.”

Scowling in indignation, Sakura almost wanted to not heal herself just to spite Ayumi, though she too had a sick feeling that this fight wouldn’t be over quickly. Sakura began trying to heal herself but her chakra was almost completely gone. So she opted to watch Ayumi and Sasori fight. It was disheartening to see a four year old take out the same amount of puppets as her in less than half the time. 

Sakura watched, and as she watched she grew suspicious. She knew Nara Ayumi was regarded as a prodigy but this seemed more than that. She fought like this was something she had been doing for years. Before she could form any real accusation Sasori body flickered in front of Ayumi and drove three swords into her small frame. The silence was broken by Ayumi’s shriek of pain. 

Sasori held the swords in her frame and began to berate her, little did he know that Ayumi was using his monologue as a chance to deliver her own deadly blow. Driving her two blades into the cylindrical piece of soft material Sasori stopped moving completely, his eyes were blown wide as he looked down towards the impaled girl. 

“I told you...I didn’t want to kill you. I’m sorry Sasori-san.”

“You...how?”

Ayumi shakily stood, gripping the handles of the swords and then ripping them out in one swift movement. Sakura gaped at the girl, she was bleeding profusely and yet hadn’t let out a peep when stabbed through the chest. Ayumi coughed as she brought a glowing green hand to her chest, assessing the wounds and then working to heal them.

“Your guard gave it away. You protect that cylinder with everything you have, even if it means sacrificing parts of your body. I asked myself why and came to the conclusion that that piece of cylindrical meat is the key to your immortality. Destroy that...and you die.”

Sasori let out a humorless laugh as he acknowledged Ayumi as a splendid fighter.

“My art… it’s useless no-”

“It’s not. The puppets you created will live on forever. Generations to come will aspire to surpass your genius but they will always acknowledge you as the creator of eternal art. Be proud of yourself for that.”

“I hope you’re right, I suppose I was wrong about you. You seem to understand the concept of eternal art better than my own grandmother could. I’ll be entrusting you with what remains of my collection, please don’t let my art die.”

Sakura strained her ears to listen to the conversation but found it useless, they were speaking in voices too small to hear from her distance. She could only watch as the remaining puppets were sealed into a scroll and thrust into Ayumi’s hand. 

“Your art will never die, I’ll make sure of it Sasori-san.”

“There’s not much left for me, I’ll leave you with this. I was supposed to meet with one of my spies in ten days time at Tenchi Bridge. My spy, he is a subordinate of my ex Akatsuki partner, Orochimaru. I know the leaf has been wanting to put an end to him so I hope this information will be of some use.”

“It is, thank you Sasori-san. I’m sorry things had to end this way.”

“Me too Ayumi…”

And with that Sasori was gone. 

Sakura was struggling to heal her Achilles tendons with the small amount of chakra she was able to produce while Ayumi struggled to regulate her breathing and blood flow. At the very least both girls were alive, though that quickly faltered when a loud explosion was heard right outside the mouth of the cave.

“Danna! Let’s get the fuck outta here. I lost the jinchuriki but Pein said that was fine.”

Deidara flew into the cave and surveyed the scene before him, multiple puppets lay destroyed on the ground and a kunoichi was pretty badly injured. Before his eyes was his danna, unresponsive with two blades sticking out of him. A small girl was directly in front of his danna, she too was bleeding but seemed to be better off than the other kunoichi. When the girl noticed him, she retched the two blades from Sasori and moved to be in a defensive stance in front of her pink haired partner. Rage filled Deidara, his danna was dead, killed by a child no less. Before he could make his move, 3 more bodies dove into the cave. 

Kakashi was completely worn out, he had used this mangekyou two times and the drain on his chakra was heavy. Seeing his female student in such a pitiful state made him want to wrap her up in a blanket and let Pakkun comfort her but he knew he couldn’t let his reputation be ruined like that. He would one day let his inner grandpa demeanor out to spoil his genin team but that day was not today. 

Gaara was furious at both missing nins, wanting nothing more than to kill them both with Sand Coffin. Not being able to catch the she-male made his anger spike even more. He was vaguely aware that there seemed to be a child on the battle ground but his attention stayed on the bomber. 

Naruto was simply trying to turn Deidara to the good side. He was spewing nonsense about the village accepting him and giving him a second chance. 

Deidara was quickly losing his patience, his Danna was dead and he had been tossed around for the last hour by three alpha males with hero complexes. He had enough chakra and clay for one last explosion so he knew he had to make it worth it, to honor Danna. Slowly he brought the clay up to his mouth as he watched the pests beneath him. Using some of the last of his clay birds Deidara blew open the top of the cave, this way his art would have more room to grow and become bigger. 

Below Deidara, Kakashi had taken in the scene with slow eyes. 

_Sakura is hurt but not terribly so. Ayumi is somewhere outside presumably unhar- WHY IS SHE IN HERE?_

Ayumi was standing in front of Sakura, both of her blades drawn and ready. Beneath her, small droplets of blood were beginning to spill onto the floor. Her shirt was soaked with blood and Kakashi could see that her body was a bit bruised up, she had definitely fought before he arrived. 

The last four of the clay bird explosives dove down into the cluster of shinobi and child, moving too fast for them to dodge and stay away from the blasts. All the shinobi mentally prepared themselves to be burned, they felt a slight tug towards the middle of their back before the immense air pressure and heat hit them. They all could feel their skin burning and the pain that followed suit, however after only a few moments they noticed that their skin was being cooled and the pain was fading. When they opened their eyes they noticed a soft green glow being released from their skin and labored breathing.

Ayumi had successfully attached chakra strings to them and was performing medical ninjutsu through them. She was breathing heavily and still holding a wakizashi in her free hand. A puddle of blood had formed underneath her body. While the entire party was focused on her, she was focused on the blonde flying above them. 

Deidara noticed how his explosions hadn’t done any damage and began to shout again. 

“Hey! How did none of you get hurt by my art? That’s cheating un!”

With that last sentence he activated his C4 explosive. 

At the same time the entire ground level turned black.

***

Gaara was by no means a weak shinobi, he was fifteen years old and already the Kazekage, being able to beat just about anybody within his village without so much as lifting a finger. That did not mean he was invincible. 

Two Akatsuki members had managed to infiltrate his village with ease, beat him and capture him within half an hour without breaking a sweat. This information told him that 1: he needed to update village security, and 2: he still had a long way to go to become a respectable Kazekage. He was lucky to have such a good friend like Naruto, someone who would willingly throw themselves at dozens of explosions just to save him. 

When he opened his eyes he had seen the ground hundreds of meters below him, he noticed wind fiercely hitting his face and his movement being restricted. Using his sand to free himself he realized that Konoha had sent one of their most elite teams to help him. Flattered and also a bit embarrassed he fought alongside Hatake Kakashi and his friend Uzumaki Naruto to try and capture Deidara. He used his shame and embarrassment as fuel for his jutsus. 

***

When it became obvious to Deidara that the battle was beginning to get one sided he decided to retreat. He would go back for his friend Sasori and then both would rendezvous with their arrogant leader, Pein. Urging his clay bird to fly faster back towards the cave he was acutely aware of a strong pure chakra. 

Flying into the cave and finding at least seventy of his Dana’s precious puppets laying destroyed on the cave floor had filled him with anger, finding his danna dead with two blades sticking out of his back made Deidara furious. Noticing a small child clutching severe wounds had made him pause. Memories of his own childhood at the hands of his ex-sensei Ōnoki were filled with him tending to his own wounds after training sessions. Even at the young age of five he was already dealing with broken bones and severe bruising. 

_A child killed danna? How? Sasori was a master at his art, how could a child possibly be able to beat him?_

Bringing him out of his shock were three chakra signatures closing in on him. Throwing his morals out the window Deidara attacked all the shinobi, if the child died in the act then it wasn’t his problem. He was genuinely surprised and impressed when the dust had cleared. Said child had attached chakra strings to each shinobi and was actively feeding them medical chakra, healing and replenishing them all while healing herself and defending her downed teammate.

Anger bubbled inside of Deidara, his danna was gone and his attack hadn’t even worked. Using the last of his explosive clay and chakra he detonated his C4 explosives, effectively blowing the entire mountainside to dust. His C4 explosives were always such beauties to watch, he smirked as he flew away from the destroyed base. 

***

You knew you were in trouble the second you decided to intervene but Sakura was going to die and Tsunade had been very clear, _“if one of them dies protecting you then that’s on you.”_

Hearing that line had been what fueled you to intercept Sasori. Danzo-sensei and the Red Room’s training had been enough to distract Sasori and get him to let his guard down. Killing him was surprisingly easy, he was a victim of the harsh life of a shinobi. He became a master puppeteer because he wanted to distract himself from his overwhelming loneliness. Despite his tragic backstory, you felt no guilt or remorse. He was threatening to kill you and Sakura, he had to die. 

Revealing the new combat iryo-ninjutsu technique you had recently created was not something you had planned. But if you hadn’t used it when you did then odds were that team seven along with the Kazekage would have suffered third degree burns and some sort of head and body trauma. Regardless of how you personally felt about them during this mission, you had a duty to fulfil as an iryo-nin and if it meant saving people you didn’t necessarily like then so be it. 

The only problem was that your new technique varied in the amount of chakra it used. If you were healing small bruises and cuts then minimal chakra would be used but healing third degree burns, multiple contusions and replenishing chakra on multiple people put a massive drain on your reserves. You just barely had enough chakra to perform the technique perfectly.

Watching “Deidara” expand like a balloon filled you with dread and fear. None of the others seemed to be paying attention to the S-rank missing nin trying to avenge his dead teammates. You didn’t have enough chakra to save everyone a second time, hell you couldn’t even save yourself if you wanted. 

When Deidara exploded you saw the entire thing in slow motion. Just as his form burst, memories of you and your family having dinner flashed before your eyes, your brother carrying you on his shoulders while you played with his silky hair, your mother and you dancing to music from her age while cleaning the house, your father bragging about you to anyone who would listen, your uncle teaching you how to use a kunai and then promptly getting beat by your father for “teaching her such dangerous things”, and Danzo-sensei engulfing you in a loving and understanding hug when you couldn’t perfect a jutsu. You didn’t see the arguments, the hateful words said to one another, you saw a family who loved you and a sensei who cared for you as if you were his blood. 

You were never going to see anyone you loved again, the sheer size of the blast would cremate your small body and then scatter the ashes. Team seven and Gaara would die here, they wouldn’t participate in the war and defeat Obito and Madara and Kaguya. You had messed up the timeline, somehow your actions will have caused the death of the shinobi world and you weren’t even going to live long enough to try and fix it. 

At that realization you felt something break inside of you, like the weight of your stupidity had broken a dam and suddenly black was spreading from the middle of your back. The black spread up your spine and down your legs engulfing your body in itself. It moved quickly towards the others, consuming them despite their attempts to move away. It covered the entirety of the ground, shinobi and you. Despite being submerged you were able to see the blast destroy the mountain side and send a mushroom of smoke into the air. 

Strangely enough you felt nothing. When the debris had settled the black began to retract, stopping when it came to the first live hostage. When the black squeezed out a finger of the person, Gaara, you felt like someone was grabbing at your insides and pulling. The pain only intensified when more of Gaara was squeezed from the black until he was fully free. 

The process only got worse with every person, so much so that by the time the third person, Kakashi, had emerged you were pulling your hair out and sobbing while withering in your own vomit and blood. Gaara and Naruto were already by your side and trying to hold you still as an attempt to assess the situation when Kakashi scurried over. 

***

Kakashi had never been more intrigued about anyone ever in his life like he was about Nara Ayumi. From the moment he first met her, as a month and a half old baby, she seemed special. She wasn’t fussy and seemed to like Gai, which had never happened before.

Then when her brother and father hadn’t been able to be in the village during her first birthday she hadn’t cried, she had used that year to study politics and observe the other shinobi in the village. After her first birthday she also began training with Gai and Lee, something not even he would do. 

When she turned two she already was, by all means, a badass. She finished an entire bottle of sake just to prove her uncle wrong and not once did she complain. She was the perfect combination of prim and proper and uninhibited and wild. She could be the sweetest little girl but then also completely destroy you with only her words. 

That night she had been targeted by an unknown group of shinobi, she had been at ground zero for a series of explosions and somehow had managed to survive, only to be abducted from her hospital room a day later. When she was found three days later she had no recollection of her abduction and from there her home life changed drastically. 

Kakashi knew Shikaku was scared of losing his daughter, he understood his determination to find the group who targeted Ayumi but he could not wrap his head around why he began neglecting the girl. Everyone knew, they could see the way Shikaku’s mood would plummet when his daughter was around. Plenty of times they had tried to warn him that he was damaging his relationship with the girl but he never listened. Not until a few months ago when she finally broke. She screamed and cried and Kakashi wanted nothing more than to comfort the young girl. She was so perceptive and intelligent at such a young age. 

Prior to the melt down, Ayumi became another apprentice to Senju Tsunade, the Godaime Hokage and best medical ninja in all of fire country, by the time she was three. By the age of four Nara Ayumi had made a name for herself as the youngest nurse practitioner in all of the elemental nations. And now only a few days shy of her fifth birthday she was pseudo leading team Kakashi on a mission to save the Kazekage from the Akatsuki, had saved his brother in the process and even killed one of the Akatsuki members herself. 

To say Nara Ayumi was a genius was an understatement. The girl was a prodigy on par with the likes of Uchiha Itachi and possibly even his own sensei, Namikaze Minato. 

She had already saved them with a healing technique he had never seen before and now she had willed her shadow to manifest and protect them all from what would have been a deadly explosion.

From Kakashi’s many late nights with Nara Ensui he knew that there were two ways a Nara’s shadow could manifest for the first time. The ideal and **safe** method was through meditation and guidance, most likely from a parents or mentor. This method assured the Nara full control of their shadow as well as the perfect manipulation of it from where it resided- beneath their feet. It usually takes a couple years to fully manifest and connect but it’s safe and has no painful drawbacks. 

The second method would be in response to a traumatic or near death experience. As a last ditch effort to keep it’s host alive, a Nara's shadow will manifest and consume everything around it, forming a sort of armor around the Nara to keep them safe.

As a result the Nara will never be able to fully control their shadows, instead of paralyzing their victims the shadow will consume them. Ensui was not sure where the objects the shadow consumed went but it was believed that in that case the Nara’s shadow is not just a reflection of light and darkness but a mix of their souls and emotions. 

When a Nara manifested their shadows this way they usually died from chakra exhaustion or were killed when they lost their sanity. They weren’t stable, they weren’t safe. 

And now Nara Ayumi, youngest daughter of Nara Shikaku, had just manifested her shadow using this method as a way to save them all. She was screaming bloody murder and almost convusing from what Kakashi could only imagine was pain, her shadow slowly receding from Sakura’s thin form. When it had fully left Sakura, Ayumi had stopped screaming but was still crying and trembling. 

Kakashi followed the girls shadow as it creeped across the ground and up the girls legs until it disappeared underneath her mesh shirt. As quickly and gently as he could, Kakashi turned the girl on her stomach and lifted her shirt to expose her back. When he did he along with Naruto and Gaara gasped. 

An ouroboros was seared into her skin, like a brand. Kakashi had never seen such a mark on anyone before but he could tell it was extremely painful by Ayumi’s body language. Holding her small frame in his arms he was also able to pinpoint three halfway healed puncture wounds in her chest, they were still bleeding but at a slow rate. Regardless Kakashi knew he had to get her medical attention as soon as possible, she may be trained like a shinobi but her body wasn’t immune to such wounds. He would punish her for disobeying his orders later.

“Sakura! How 's your chakra output right now?”

“Um why Kakashi-sensei?”

“Ayumi is going to bleed out if we don’t get her help soon, can you heal her wounds?”

“Oh...no I’m sorry Kakashi-sensei, my reserves are completely drained.”

At Sakura’s response Kakashi paused, when the first round of explosives went off Ayumi had attached chakra strings to all of them which both healed and replenished their reserves. Kakashi himself felt his reserves being back at what they were before they had chased Deidara. This made Kakashi very suspicious of Sakura’s response, he would interrogate her later. 

“Kazekage-sama would you help us get medical attention for Ayumi-chan when we get back to Suna, I fear we’ll lose her if we don’t.”

“This child saved us all twice, the least I can do is return the favor.”

With that said the four shinobi set out back towards Suna, if they kept up the speed they were traveling at then they would arrive back in about three hours. Kakashi cradled chibi-chan to his chest, doing his best to put pressure on her wounds and avoiding touching her brand. He knew he had hurt her deeply when he called her a liability but he was high off of emotion from her earlier jab at his professional opinion. 

_Chibi-chan has survived everything thus far, she will hold out until we get back to Suna._

Kakashi kept his hopes high, Ayumi had proven herself to be a member of team seven already and he was fucked if he let her die. Besides, if she did die then Kakashi would be the one who would face Tsunade and her clan.

***

When Kankuro had opened his eyes he felt like the entire last day and a half was just a dream, though this was quickly dismissed when a nurse rushed in and asked him how he was feeling. Half an hour later he was dressed and preparing to lead a backup squad to help team seven retrieve his brother. Just as Baki was walking him towards the outskirts of the village a large sum of their shinobi began to shout. Looking out towards the horizon like them, both Kankuro and Baki saw team seven along with Gaara sprinting towards Suna. 

Relief filled Kankuro at the sight of his brother, he had been prepared for the absolute worse but seeing him alive and mobile made Kankuro want to jump for joy. Watching team seven and his brother pass through the village gates had Kankuro opening his mouth and arms to engulf his brother in a hug and spew gratitude towards everyone. Just as he was about to hug his brother he spoke.

“Kankuro I cannot speak for long, we must get this child to the hospital. Please help me clear a path for them.”

Looking back into Kakashi-san’s arms was a small child. She was trembling and covered in dried blood. 

“Yeah- yeah of course. C’mon follow me!”

Kankuro led them into the special section of the hospital where only the Kazekage’s family was treated. Once there Gaara had ordered for the best medical team to save the small girl. Strapping the girl onto a gurney had given Kankuro a clear view of her face, his stomach dropped when he realized that she was the same doctor who had treated him earlier. 

On one hand he felt a bit embarrassed, in his woozy state he had thought the doctor to be very beautiful and young looking, promising himself to ask her out when he was better. Finding out that his crush had been a child had ruined any romantic feelings he may have held for her.

On the other hand he felt incredibly sick and angry. Whoever had done this to a child was a monster. The girl was half dead for goodness sake. Bringing him out of his thoughts was a nurse asking if the girl had any preexisting conditions that could affect her overall health.

“She has a very weak heart and severe asthma. I’m not sure of the details but she’s scheduled to have some sort of heart surgery before she turns five.” 

With that said the doctors rushed the girl into the operating room, leaving the leaf shinobi and Kazekage to wait.

***

“Get the antidote she created for Sasori’s poison!”

“Second degree burns throughout the left side of her body.”

“Heart palpitations turning erratic!”

“Left lung has collapsed.”

“Her body is rejecting the blood transplant.”

“Black markings are beginning to spread from middle of back.”

“Get the ventilator!”

“Flatlining!”

***

 _Bruce Banner was a very special person to you. He struggled to love himself and see himself as anything but a monster. He was the only person who could possibly relate to you._

_“Where can I go? Where in the world am I not a threat?”_

_He was upset, understandably so. If you could turn into a giant green man who had no regard for others safety then you would get upset too. Despite that you gently laid a hand on his shoulder and responded to him._

_“You're not a threat to me.”_

_“Are you sure? Even if I didn't just... There's no future with me.”_

_He paused and looked towards Barton’s home, a longing look in his eyes. When he poked again his voice held pain and sadness._

_“I can't ever... I can't have this. Kids. Do the math. I physically can't.”_

_“Neither can I.”_

_Bruce turned a curious and concerned face towards you. You had never talked about having a family in the future, despite being a loyal member of the team Bruce knew little to nothing about your past. Deciding to confide in him like you had in Barton your revealed a small bit of your past._

_“In the Red Room where I was trained... where I was raised, they have a graduation ceremony. They sterilize you. It's efficient. One less thing to worry about. The one thing that might matter more than a mission. Makes everything easier. Even killing. You still think you're the only monster on the team?”_

_At your question a silence fell between the two of you, a fond smile spread on your face as you saw Lila heading your way._

***

Opening your eyes revealed bright fluorescent lights. Squinting your eyes, you also became aware of an oxygen mask strapped to your face as well as the annoying constant beeping of medical machines. Memories of your past life left you feeling absolutely broken inside. You missed your friends, you missed your nieces and nephew, you wanted to tell Bruce that you accepted him as he was, that there was nothing wrong with him. 

Tears steadily trekked from your eyes and into your hair as you attempted to lift the oxygen mask from your face. Looking around with blurred eyes revealed a medium sized room with dirt walls and two circular windows. The walls had multiple animals carved into them, the bed was also smaller than the normal sized hospital beds in Konoha and the hospital gown you were in was a baby pink color with small flowers. Either you were tripping balls or you were in a children's hospital room. 

Sitting up you looked to your right, the beeping was coming from a patient monitor and an EKG machine. An IV was inserted in your right hand and an ultrasound machine was also in the room. Moving your legs to dangle over the side of the bed you prepared yourself to stand up. Your chakra was making its way throughout your sluggish body but frankly speaking you were surprised it was even moving at all. Given how big your output of chakra had been yesterday you expected to not be able to feel your chakra for at least a week. 

You slightly jumped when the door to your room opened, gawking in shock when Shizune walked in. Her eyebrows were furrowed as she walked over to you squatting to be at eye level with you. 

“Ayumi-chan, do you remember what happened before you got here?”

“We’re..in Suna?”

“Yes Ayumi-chan, this is Suna. Now answer my question please.”

“Yes I remember going to save the Kazekage. There were two Akatsuki members holding him. I wasn’t supposed to get involved but towards the end Sakura was in trouble. Sasori had managed to sever her Achilles tendons and he was going to decapitate her so I had to protect her!”

“Sakura said she had everything under control, you just threw yourself into the fight for no reason.”

“Oh is that what she said? Bring her in please, I want to hear it from her own goddamn filthy fucking mouth. I may be a brat and I may be troublesome but I’m not a fucking liar!”

“Okay, okay let’s not get you riled up alright? Your heart is in a very vulnerable state right now.”

“Whatever. How long have we been here? How did you get here so quickly?”

“Ayumi-chan your mission to save the Kazekage ended almost a week and a half ago. When you were first admitted here the Kazekage sent a missive explaining everything. Tsunade-sama sent me here along with a backup team. We’ve been waiting for you to wake so we can evaluate your physical, mental and emotional health before we head back to Konoha.”

“A week and a half? So..my birthday?”

“I’m sorry sweetheart, your birthday passed over a week ago. But I’m sure your family is eagerly waiting for you to get back so they can throw you a birthday party. Between you and me I know Tsunade-sama has a really cool present waiting for you.”  
Hearing that hadn’t made you feel any less like a burden. Your family was probably worried sick since they most likely knew about the mission going wrong. That thought made you feel like shit, like you were nothing but trouble to them. Maybe Kakashi was right after all. That feeling bundled with the memories of your past life led you to an embarrassing sob fest where you left Shizune’s uniform shirt damp with tears and snot before falling back asleep.

***

When you had been cleared from both the hospital staff and Shizune, you were given a mini version of the standard Konoha shinobi attire to change into. Your brothers genin shirt was matted with your dried blood and would need to be thoroughly soaked in bleach before being able to be used again. Your faded burgundy tresses were pulled into a high ponytail, leaving only a few strands to fall on your face. The entire left side of your body had been covered in bandages because apparently you also had suffered second degree burns. There was more to your condition that Shizune wasn’t telling you but you guessed it didn’t matter in the end. 

Meeting up with team seven made you upset, Sakura clearly held some sort of grudge against you, Kakashi belittled you and Naruto was just too impressionable, easily taking Sakura’s side in any argument. You were pleasantly surprised to find team three waiting with team seven. When your eyes locked with Gai’s you set off at a dead sprint and throw yourself at him. He easily caught you and spun you around shouting to the heavens about your power of youth and wishing you a happy late birthday. 

Lee mimicked his sensei’s enthusiasm and promised to carry you all the way to Konoha like “the beautiful lotus you are Ayumi-chan!”

You bowed to Tenten and Neji out of respect but completely ignored team seven. This did not go unnoticed by everyone present. When you asked when you would be heading out Gai-sensei assured you that it would be soon, they were simply waiting for the Kazekage and his siblings. 

You were idly drawing in the sand when you felt someone crouch with you, looking up you found purple face paint adorning a handsome face. Kankuro was looking at your sand drawing and making an exaggerated pensive pose. He took his finger and added to your drawing, making you smile.

“You know sensei I never got to thank you for saving my life, originally I wanted to take you out on a date but seeing as you’re an actual kid I had to think of a different way to make it up to you. So I thought we could be twins!”

Kankuro pulled out a clear package, inside of it was a mini version of the cat eared uniform he was wearing along with black sandals. You instantly latched onto the package and thanked him quietly so no one else would hear. He laughed and asked if you wanted to change into it and you nodded. Kankuro flew through hand signs and four walls of sand flew up around your body. After he assured you that you could change, you ripped off your clothes and gleefully put on the three pieces. 

Knocking on the walls to signal you were finished you were smiling brightly at Kankuro. He chuckled and helped you fold up your previous outfit to pack away. Just before you could zip up your pack Kankuro gave you three scrolls, making you promise him that you wouldn’t open them until you get home. He also threw in five containers of face paint, all different colors. He opened the purple face paint and showed you how to apply it to your face skillfully and quickly. You were overjoyed at this, having a full conversation with Kankuro. 

The rest of the party was watching you with varying expressions. Team three had soft smiles on their faces, Naruto was smiling widely, Kakashi was curious as to how Kankuro had gotten you to open up to him in such a short amount of time and Sakura was turned away from the sight.

By the time Gaara and Temari had arrived you and Kankuro looked identical. Temari couldn’t stop herself from bursting out laughing while Gaara simply shook his head. There were many thanks passed around but you paid no attention to them, instead choosing to cling to Kankuro’s pant leg. When Gaara and Temari turned to you, you respectfully bowed and thanked them for their hospitality. 

“Nara Ayumi, you saved my life and the lives of my friends twice. If there is ever anything I can do for you please don’t hesitate to ask. You have my sincere gratitude.”  
You shyly nodded your head and bowed in respect. Then Temari titled your head up and kissed your forehead.

“You know squirt, I like you a lot more than your idiot brother. Thanks for saving my little brother but please don’t inflate Kankuro’s ego anymore by idolizing him! Have a safe trip home squirt.”

When it was Kankuro’s turn to say goodbye, he simply gave you a fist bump and a wide smile.

“See you later mini-me! I expect great things from you.”

With the goodbyes out of the way you were lifted onto Lee’s back, since you were still in a frail state of health you would be carried all the way back to Konoha. As the leaf shinobi began to cross the desert you thought about your past life and hoped that they had moved on from your death. This was a new start for you, you weren’t in the red room or shield anymore so there was nothing stopping you from growing old and having a family of your own. 

With that thought in mind you drifted off to sleep with a smile on your purple face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo throw me some ideas as to who I should kill off if any at all! Idk I really need a beta reader/editor.


	11. 政治は面倒です

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I love Raido and Genma :)

_“Ino You've grown up to become the embodiment of the Yamanaka clan's purple crest.”_

_“The bush clover, and what it symbolizes, optimistic love right?”_

_“That's not the only thing the bush clover stands for.The thing I am most proud of is your care and compassion for your friends! I've watched you blossom into a beautiful bush clover flower. Our time's almost up. Do you have any final words, Shikaku?”_

_“Hmm Could you tell your mom this for me, Shikamaru...Wait! Before that, throw out that thing in the wooden box on the left-hand shelf of the storeroom without your mom finding out!”_

_“I know all about it Don't worry.”_

_“Lastly from me, Never forget that we live on inside of you forever. Don't forget! Don't mock me! Don't mess with the Nara Clan!”_

***

You jolted awake harshly, so much so that Lee also startled and quickly asked if you were alright. You weren’t alright, you had just seen your father and your uncle die seconds after giving their last words to their children. You felt absolutely crushed, your father would die in the war and there was little you could do to stop it. From the looks of it a giant black rasengan completely destroyed the building your father and uncle had been in, they had knowledge of it coming they’re way and still they decided to stay. They decided it was better to die than to fight.. 

Violently shaking your head to answer Lee’s question led to him alerting the group to stop moving. Setting you down resulted in you running towards some nearby shrubbery and vomiting, you could not stomach the fact that your father would do such a cowardly thing. He was your rock, your role model for the perfect shinobi and yet he chose to die rather than to fight. 

That single decision went against every moral and belief he had instilled in you since you could sit upright. It was wrong. It was cowardly. Your father educated you about how Nara’s were wrongly perceived to outsiders - sly snakes who avoid confrontation even if it costs them their pride, they use their shadows to hide themselves from the fight, they would rather leave a comrade to die if it meant having to use less effort - and yet he had proven them all right. 

You weren’t aware of the steady tears falling into the puddle of stomach bile, nor were you aware of the increased difficulty of taking in a full breath. When you did become aware of these details you were already being guided with breathing exercises by Shizune, and the rest of the party had moved to watch you from a safe distance. 

Just as you managed to take a full breath a burning pain from your back had you almost face planting into your stomach bile. Gasping you reached for your back as the pain spread, Shizune was holding a glowing green palm to your chest. When you made moves to your back she brought her hand to follow yours, eyes growing wide when she tried to run an analysis on your condition. 

“Kakashi-san, you said her shadow receded into her back?”

Said man stepped forward and held your body in a gentle but firm grip, stopping any involuntary movement on your part. 

“Ah that would be correct. It receded into that brand.”

For a minute, no one spoke. Shizune had managed to remove your black long sleeve turtleneck and was currently focused on the apparent brand you had. You were growing more and more restless as the pain spread, biting your lip to avoid screaming. 

“Kakashi-san can you use your sharingan to look at the brand please. It feels like it’s releasing chakra but if that is the case then I’m not sure why that would be causing Ayumi-chan such pain.”

Several minutes passed with the group making suggestions about what could be wrong, Tenten was trying to distract you by showing you one of her many chakra blades but you were too preoccupied with trying to contain your screams. You were slowly getting used to the pain by the time Shizune spoke to you again.

“Ayumi-chan I’m going to need you to be really brave for me alright? I’m going to try to cut this weird mark off of your body. Kakashi-san and Gai-san are going to help me hold you still so I don’t knick your spine by accident.”

You didn’t have enough time to question why she was going to such measures before you felt her chakra scalpel make the first incision. Throwing your image out the window you let out an ear piercing wail and made a futile attempt to move away. The grip of two jounin was enough to keep your body steady but your head was frantically shaking as you cried louder. Tenten tried to hold your face in her hands to calm you but something inside of you was telling you to get away from the group. 

Shizune was working quickly, already she had cut the outline of the ouroboros brand but it seemed that with every incision the brand would release more chakra. You were screaming bloody murder the entire time and she wished could tell you it was almost over but in reality she still had another fifteen minutes of work to do. When she attempted to cut underneath the brand your body went completely limp.

***

Opening your eyes you instantly recognized the sterile white ceiling tiles of Konoha’s hospital. Not bothering to wonder how long you had been unconscious for you rubbed your blurry eyes and sat up. Upon doing so a large hand gently cupped your face. Removing your hands from your eyes, revealed your father, dark circles under his eyes and greasy haired. His beard had needed to be shaved and he seemed to have lost weight but there he was, a foot away from you and alive. 

Tears quickly filled your eyes as you nuzzled into his hand and for the first time in a long time you called him by his preferred title. 

“Papa, you’re here.”

Your voice was broken and barely above a whisper but it was enough for him to widen his eyes in surprise, pick you up off the bed and cradle you in his arms. He was very careful to not pull on any of the wires connected to your body as he smothered you in kisses.

“My sweet sweet Ayumi-chan. Of course I’m here, there’s absolutely no place I’d rather be than with my little shadow. There’s so much we need to do now that you’re back from your mission, I heard you saved the Kazekage’s brother. Is that true my sweet baby?”

Now more awake you gazed at your father’s face, vowing to yourself that if he couldn't save himself from death then you would save him on your own.

“I saved him, I saved everyone.. I promise I’ll save you too.”

At your slurred words your father stiffened, he didn’t know what you meant by “saving him” so he made sure to ask you at a later time. He held you closer and kissed your head.

“I heard about that, you really are incredible aren’t you?”

Before you could respond the door to your room opened. Your mother was carrying two bags of food and had an appearance similar to your father. 

“Shikaku, I got us some Ichiraku ramen and a bottle of sake to share. I didn’t know if you wanted chicken or pork so I got us one of ea-”

Your mother’s eyes widened at you in your father’s arms. You shifted until you were completely facing her and held out your hands, wanting to be carried. Seeing her after such an ordeal was one of the biggest reliefs you had ever felt.

“M-momma..”

She gasped at your words and hastily dropped the bags onto your unused bed before scooping you up into her arms. Tears were steadily making their way down your face as you hiccuped repeatedly into her shoulder. She shushed you gently and ran her hand through your tangled, wavy locks. 

“It’s alright sweetheart, you’re safe now. Mommy and daddy are here and soon your brother will be too. You’re alright now.”

She slowly began to pace in front of your father while reassuring you, her stride lulling you to a dreamless sleep. 

***

“Obviously your first mission wasn’t injury free, though, you still achieved your objective and as Kazekage-sama has informed us, Shukaku is still within him. He made sure to write extensively about your heroic role in his and team seven’s survival, so for that I will applaud you. But you got hurt. We need to work on that.”

You bowed your head in respect and spoke softly.

“I have you to thank for teaching me medical ninjutsu, without it no one would have returned from that mission.”

“Haha flattery will not save you from the hell you’re going to pay later gaki! Also, we need to discuss this official infraction Kakashi filed this morning. It says you blatantly disregarded your superiors orders without a justified reason for doing so.”

“That’s bullshit! If I hadn’t joined the fight Sakura would be dead.”

“Really? When I asked for her verbal report she said the same thing. You involved yourself in a fight you had no business involving yourself in. How can two of my most trusted shinobi be wrong?”

“Kakashi wasn’t there, how could he possibly say that my involvement was unjustified? You want the truth, bring team Kakashi now.”

“Mmm very well. Hawk, bring me team Kakashi.”

***

“No Shishou, everything in my report was accurate. Nara Ayumi had no business involving herself in my fight against Sasori. In fact, her involvement caused more problems.”

You were fuming as you listened to Sakura lie. You so desperately wanted to refute her words and set the record straight but you knew you had to wait for the appropriate time. This disagreement quickly became an entire situation all too quickly, apparently challenging an infraction from a superior called for a meeting with team Kakashi, the hokage and the council. It really was similar to a court hearing.

“Kakashi-san, you agree with your teammate Sakura-san? Nara Ayumi acted wrongfully and endangered others in the process?”

“I cannot speak with absolute certainty that my student’s account of the events are accurate but I do know that I ordered Ayumi-chan to not engage in any type of combat. When I returned to the scene, she was in a compromising position, both of her wakizashis were sticking out of Sasori’s back. My student, Sakura, has never once given me any reason to be suspicious of her words. I don’t believe she would lie to me.”

You bit your lip to stop yourself from scoffing at his words. Elder Koharu hummed and wrote something down in her notepad before continuing her questioning.

“Is it possible that you were not clear in your orders to Nara Ayumi, perhaps she misunderstood?”

“There’s no possible way she could have misinterpreted my orders. I made it a point to call her what she currently is, a liability. Given her impressive track record as a Nara prodigy I would hope she understood the meaning of the word.”

“I see. Now I will ask you Nara Ayumi, you must be familiar with the repercussions filing a false challenge to a superior’s infraction entails correct?”

Now you could speak.

“Yes, elder Koharu. I fully understand them.”

“Very well, please give us your reasoning.”

“Of course. As Hatake-san stated, I was indeed given orders to not involve myself in any combat and I dutifully followed those orders until the situation became dire. Hatake-san and Uzumaki-san evidently left Haruno-san to take on an S-rank missing nin by herself, as you can imagine, that quickly took a turn for the worst. Sasori-san was too great of a threat for Haruno-san to handle on her own, managing to beat her and severe her achilles tendons within twenty minutes of combat. Once Haruno-san was downed, I moved. I defended the girl against the S-rank missing nin, ultimately killing him. Seconds after killing Sasori-san, the second S-rank missing nin rejoined the scene, followed by Hatake-san, Uzumaki-san and Kazekage-sama. I used a medical ninjutsu technique I developed on my own to save them from concentrated explosions. Then I willed my shadow to shield them from the massive explosion that destroyed the mountain we were inside. Had I not acted when I did then not only would three Konoha shinobi be dead but so would the current Kazekage. That is my report.”

“Do you have anyone who can back up your report?”

“Well, no. Sasori-san is dead and Haruno-san is a liar.”

“Watch your tongue girl, as far as the facts are concerned you are the liar. Sakura-san has two people who are able to comaderate her story while you have none and that’s completely leaving out the fact that you aren’t a shinobi. Frankly speaking, you shouldn’t have even gone on the mission in the first place. ”

“I understand, please forgive me.”

After apologizing, Koharu went back to her notes while Homura simply stared at you, analyzing your body language. Once Koharu finished writing, she turned to her two counsil men. 

“I have reached my verdict, Homura, Danzo, what do you have to say on the matter?”

Danzo spoke first.

“Why would a prodigy throw themselves into harm's way if not to save a comrade? We teach teamwork here in the leaf, is it not possible that what Ayumi-chan says is the truth? I too have reached my verdict.”

Homura was the only one left. For a while no one said a word, Homura’s head was bowed and his eyes were closed in deep thought. When he opened them, they were unreadable.

“I have reached my verdict.”

Tsunade clapped her hands once and drew the attention back to her. 

“Very well, I am neutral in this entire situation. What the council decides will be the official verdict. Council members, you may proceed.”

“Given the substantial testimony from one of Konoha’s greatest shinobi, I must agree with the infraction filed against Ayumi-san.”

“I do not agree with the infraction filed.”

“I want to believe that Nara-chan had her teams best interest in mind but given the testimonies and lack of evidence to back her case, I must agree with the infraction filed against Nara Ayumi.”

Well, there goes your shinobi career and reputation. You bit your lip and bowed your head. You silently made your way to Tsunade and thanked her for teaching you before turning back to the council of elders. Bowing deeply you hoped they would not notice the shakiness of your voice.

“Thank you for allowing me to attempt clearing this mess up. I’m sorry for wasting your precious time, please excuse me.”

As quickly as you could you bowed deeply and then scurried out of the office, not once looking back.

***

Life as a civilian was boring as shit, you woke up whenever you pleased and immersed yourself with Konoha’s current political climate to try and make the time pass more quickly but that wasn’t working. When you first arrived back home after the trial, your entire family was waiting anxiously and nearly jumped at you to get the details. You hadn’t been able to look any of them in the eye, too ashamed to have lost your status as a prodigious shinobi in such a small amount of time. When your uncle finally voiced his curiosity you answered in a small voice.

“I’m no longer allowed to pursue a career as a kunoichi of Konohagakure through means of my apprenticeship, I have to wait until I graduate from the academy like everyone else. I will continue my career as a politician for now since that’s all I have left.”

The expressions everyone had after hearing your words was almost comical, if you had been in a different position you would have laughed. Returning your brother’s genin shirt to him was awkward as hell but you no longer had a use for it. 

After that awkward encounter with your family, no one had brought up the topic of your shinobi career. It was painfully obvious that you were hurting on many different levels but there really wasn’t much anyone could do. This decision was oficial, there was nothing anyone could say or do to change it. You could still become a shinobi of Konoha but this would stain your record and reputation for life, you would be branded viewed as a liar.

Your new sentencing had not sat well with your uncle and Asuma, when they caught wind of what had happened they both confronted Kakashi about it and evidently cut ties with him. A small part of you was guilty for causing a rift in Kakashi’s already small circle of friends and his one stable relationship but the greater part of you was almost happy about it. You wanted him to know how you felt, losing two people close to him would give him a small taste of that. 

Instead of wallowing in your own shame you threw yourself into politics and work. Not only had Kankuro gifted you a few sets of matching clothing and face paint but also a few scrolls on puppeteering and chakra threads. Paired with the twenty or so puppets Sasori had entrusted you with, you were bunkered down in your room for the majority of your days, only leaving to eat and use the restroom. 

***

_Let’s see, connect all ten chakra threads to the puppet, nice. Now force your chakra to spread throughout the joints of the puppet, got that. Gradually release your chakra threads until you’re only using the minimum amount needed to easily operate the puppet, in my case three. Now...move!_

You were currently in the Nara compound training grounds, running through a few puppet exercises with two of the puppets Sasori had given you. You no longer were allowed to use the normal training ground so you were stuck using the one in your compound. 

On your lap was a current scroll detailing the economic struggles Konoha farmers were experiencing, turns out there was a massive shortage of grain this year. As you finished up the exercises you felt someone slowly come towards you. Looking up you weren’t surprised to see the wrinkled face of Nara Enchū peering down at you. 

“Enchū-sama, to what do I owe this pleasant surprise?”

“Talk of the town is that you’ve lost your reputation as a prodigy, care to explain?”

“I believed saving a comrade from their death was a justified reason to ignore my commanders orders. I guess they didn’t share the same sentiment.”

“I see… and what has this experience taught you?”

“Never defy orders. Even if it costs you the lives of your comrades, the mission and orders comes first.”

“You have every right to be jaded Ayumi-chan but keep in mind that you must not stay jaded for long, that’s how a heart hardens and you turn grey prematurely.”

You knew he was trying to make you smile with the premature greying joke but you didn’t laugh. Instead, you focused on sealing up the two puppets and stretching.

“Is that all you wished to tell me, to let go of my anger before it makes me bitter?”

“No, there is an annual political conference held in Kusagakure in a week, I want you to join me in attendance. Most of what is discussed there you have already mastered. This will be your first step into the world of politics as a Nara politician. We leave in a day.”

“Okay.”

With that he turned around and walked back the way he came, leaving you to train by yourself.

***

“Team Yamato, your assignment will be to escort Nara Enchū and Nara Ayumi to Kusagakure for a connference being held. Once they are escorted safely, you will part ways with them and continue to the tenchi bridge for observation. Make sure you are back at the conference in three days time to bring them back. Dismissed!”

You resisted the urge to groan when you saw who would be escorting you. You pointedly ignored them all until you were finally outside of Konoha. Falling back to stay in step with Sai, you couldn’t help but want to smack him for his fake smile.

“Don’t smile at me like that, it creeps me out.”

“But Ayumi-chan, I’m happy to see you again. Although it does seem you’ve lost your equal footing with me.”

“Shut your mouth Sai, you know damn well I can still beat your ass in a spar. Just because I don’t have a stupid headband doesn’t mean I’m any less strong than before. If you need a reminder I’d be more than happy to give you one.”

“Ah Ayumi-chan, it’s good to see you’re still as sprie as ever, though I don’t see how you could manage to fight me in that get-up.”

At his sentence you struck the back of his knee, effectively making him buckle and fall to the dirt. You were wearing a formal dark green yukata with brand new sandals. You were about to stomp on his hand when a large hand stopped you from moving. Looking up to the concerned face of Yamato, you made sure your face held no emotion. Asking him why he felt it was appropriate to touch you, you gave him no time to respond as you continued your tirade.

“Yamato-san, I am very much acquainted with Sai. He knows better than to provoke me.”

“Is that true Sai, you don’t need to feel pressured to lie.”

“No no it’s true Yamato taicho, little Ayumi is like a sister to me. We’ve known each other long enough for this to be normal.” 

“Just because your senpai believes me to be a liar doesn’t make it true. I’m not a liar, not about my missions. I’ll be filing a formal complaint against you and this team if this happens again, Neko-san.”

You took in his shocked face with satisfaction and moved closer to your clan elder again. For the rest of the walk that day, no one bothered you. 

***

“Sai, are you positive you can complete your mission? I don’t want you to die a senseless death.”

“Do not worry about me Ayumi-chan, Danzo-sama has trained me specifically for this mission.”

You and Sai were sitting on a pier overlooking a pond, it was early morning and the group had stopped to rest a few miles away from the conference. Sai had been drawing the landscape when you approached. You knew his mission was risky, killing Uchiha Sasuke was a monumental task that only a select few could take on, you weren’t sure Sai was one of those people. 

When you had seen Danzo-sensei shortly after the trial, he had informed you that regardless of what the Hokage may say, you were a shinobi. He even went as far as to say that the situation was optimal, now you could devote more of your time to ROOT instead of taking useless missions. 

You had been the one to inform him of the spy rendezvous Sasori had in place, helping him plan accordingly to take down Sasuke. Now, speaking with Sai, you couldn’t help but fear for him. He was just a child who had no choice in the life he was living. Shaking away those thoughts, you gently took the sketchpad from him and held his hands in yours, taking in the large difference in skin tone.

“Sai, please be careful. I’ve given you all of the information I have on Uchiha but that doesn’t mean he might still have a few tricks up his sleeve. If you cannot safely dispose of him then please give him the scroll I prepared, it’ll make him less of a threat.”

“Of course Aumi-sama, you must not worry yourself over me.”

“Also, I have a request.”

“Alright.”

“I need you to kill Kabuto, even if it means abandoning your mission. Sensei will understand, I’ve already explained a bit to him. Take this, it’s everything you need to know to kill Kabuto, please, please, please do this for me.”

“Of course Ayumi-sama, I will complete the task no matter what.”

“Thank you S-”

“Hey! What are you two whispering about? Why are you holding hands?”

You gave one last meaningful look to Sai before standing up and walking to where your clan elder was staying. As you left you caught Yamato's gaze on you. Smiling at him and listening in to the three teens fight in the distance, you kept on towards Enchū.

***

To say the conference was a bore would be a gross understatement. The conference was horrible, it was exactly as you feared it would be, old, rich men giving speeches on morale and ways to make money. 

“It’s great to be here at Event Horizons, home of the elemental nations top politicians and economists.”

 _Cue the applause._

“There will be life after the Kages. But the truth is that our problems didn’t start just with the Kages, and we won’t solve them by embracing old ideas. We need a bold vision: universal civilian schooling and universal health care without the need to serve as a shinobi, unleashing millions of new jobs in the clean energy economy, a tax system that rewards people who have to work real jobs for a living.”

“But first, we have to win. And that means exciting a young, diverse coalition of politicians who are ready for a bold future. That’s what Kaito did, it’s what Sumir did, it’s what Kiwa did, it’s what Kendo did, and it’s what I can do in this race. Get back Kiri and Iwa, Ame and Kumo, and finally turn Konoha blue and say goodbye to Senju Tsunade and the age of shinobi!”

The event was very open about their anti-kage views, leaving you shocked at your clan elder for thinking this would be beneficial to you. Regardless you listened and even took notes on their ideas and plans, knowing you’d most likely ask Enchū clarifying questions later. 

Just as the second day of the conference was coming to a close, you experienced a very sharp pain from your head. It was quick but powerful, it left you gasping in pain loud enough to draw your elders attention.

“Ayumi-chan, are you alright?”

“...I don’t know, there was a sharp pain in my head. I don’t know how to expl-”

Just as you were speaking to the elder, the pain returned, stronger and long lasting this time. You knew you were scaring the people around you, Enchū was loudly asking if anyone had any medical experience and trying to calm you but to no avail. 

The last image you saw before passing out was that of a masked cloaked figure dropping down next to the Nara elder and reaching out towards you. 

***

 _Elsewhere in Space, in a completely different Plane of Existence:_

“They’re protecting the dead woman, why? Why would they risk their own lives for someone who is already dead?” 

The Great Titan watched as the humans scattered, their leader tenderly holding onto the dead woman while trying to reach safety. As far as he was aware the woman had given her life to retrieve the soul stone, one of the six infinity stones he so desperately was looking for. 

“I do not know my lord, perhaps they’re sentimental and wish to bury her properly? You know humans are riddled with weak emotions.”

Ebony Maw always wished to please his father, he was his second favorite child after all. 

“No I don’t believe that to be the reason, they’re protecting her from us. Why? Get me a scan of their heat and radiation signatures, maybe they’ll pick up whatever it is we’re missing.” 

Thanos was no idiot, he understood human emotion enough to manipulate it but nothing about how these humans were acting was normal. No one simply risked their lives to save the dead body of their friend. Waiting for the scan to finish, the Great Titan contemplated his plan of action. 

_There are two Nebula’s, one from now and one from nine years into the future. The humans are looking for the infinity stones and from what we’ve seen they’ve been successful. This is the perfect chance to take what’s rightfully mine._

“Sire, the woman! Her radiation signature matches that of the other stones. They’re saving her body because it has something to do with one of the infinity stones.”

 _Interesting._

“Inform Corvus and Proxima, they are to retrieve that body and bring it back here for extraction. What is that small radiation fluctuation there in the far left?”

“It seems to be a vial of some sort, one of the humans must have dropped it while running.”

“Tell them to bring me that vial as well.”

“Of course, sire.”

The Great Titan resumed watching the weak insects as they scattered throughout the vast land of Vormir. He smiled to himself, regardless of their efforts, they would not escape. His children were strong, stronger than any army in the galaxy. They would not fail him.

***

When you awoke, you were thoroughly confused and sporting a killer headache. Vaguely aware of the fact that you were strapped onto someone's back, you found it difficult to make out much else. The scenery was moving too quickly for you, your body was jolting with the steps of the person you were on. Groaning loudly when your attempts to move resulted in a rush of nausea, the person attached to you called out orders to stop moving and then gently came to a stop, shifting your body until you were on the ground. 

You held your head and took deep breaths to calm your nausea, only stopping when you were sure you wouldn’t vomit. Opening your eyes, you were greeted with the face of Yamato, a whole 4 inches from your face. 

“What the fuck happened?”

“I’m not sure, you tell me Ayumi-san. Your clan elder informed us that you fainted during the last few hours of the conference and began running a high fever. Do you recall that?”

You thought for a moment and then decided that you did remember that. Nodding towards Yamato, he hummed and then ordered for someone to check your wellbeing. A bit out of it, you failed to realize that Sakura was the only qualified medic, scowling when she knelt down in front of you.

“No that’s fine, I don’t need her subpar medical skills. I can do this myself.”

That sentence alone brought on a wave of killing intent directed at you from the medic. You ignored her, moving to an open clearing to begin your self check up. Sakura was muttering curses, Naruto was yelling at you, Enchū simply moved to be close to you, Sai, strangely enough, was the furthest from you and Yamato was desperately trying to convince you to allow Sakura to perform the check up while also reminding Naruto to not displease the client. 

When you finished your diagnostic jutsu and deemed yourself healthy enough to continue on foot, you stood. Turning your body to face the Nara clan elder you bowed deeply and spoke.

“Enchū-sama, please forgive me for causing you any worry. I’m not sure what may have happened then but I am healthy enough now to continue on home.”

“That’s relieving to hear, Ayumi-chan. I’m not sure what I would have told your father if you had returned unconscious.”

He patted your head fondly before asking the shinobi to continue on with the journey home. The entire walk you tried to catch Sai’s attention but he was addamently avoiding you. Feeling unease grow inside of you, you opted to keep your silence until you finally arrived home. 

***

“Sensei, it’s not fair! How could the council and Hokage believe I would lie about saving a comrade? Who does that?! Now I’m stuck being a civilian for life!”

You were currently in Danzo’s office, sprawled on his couch, ranting about your current career predicament. Your sensei was sitting at his desk, chuckling at your behaviour and allowing you to do as you pleased.

“That’s not true, little one. You will always be a ROOT operative, a shinobi of the highest caliber. Being recognized by the hokage and council means very little for your career.”

At that statement you couldn’t help but pout because on one hand he was right, you were part of an organized group of outstanding shinobi but on the other hand you wished to be able to prove to the village and those surrounding it that you were a force to be reckoned with. Rationally, you recognized that you could accomplish your goals much easier if you remain anonymous, working in the shadows as ROOT commander Widow. No one would ever guess that a five year old child would be the one to play God, to decide who dies and when. 

But you also yearned for that glory and recognition, you wanted the name, “Nara Ayumi” to instill fear in the hearts of men just as the Yellow Flash did. You wanted to be feared by your enemies and loved by your people. You wanted to prove to your sexist clan that gender doesn’t dictate your strength or capabilities.

“That’s not the same sensei, I want to be known for being strong, I want enemy nations to fear my name as they do yours. I want to be like you, respected by their peers and village but feared by everyone else.”

“Hmm I see, you wish to be like me?”

“Well, yeah. You’re the strongest person I know sensei, your name carries power. I want my name to instill fear like yours or possibly even more so. I’m your student, the product of your devotion and skillset, I want to bring honor to your name as Namikaze Minato did with Jiraiya the Sannin.”

“Haha Ayumi-chan you really are laying it on thick right now. What are you seeking of me, my child?”

“You’re capable of influencing the council to retry my case, convince them to do so. Please, please, please sensei.”

“Ayumi-chan, even if I did convince them to retry the case, the end result would stay the same. You don’t have sufficient evidence or credible testimony to back up your claim. You would somehow need to prove your side, if you can tell me how you’d do that then I’ll convince the council to do a retrial.”

Danzo’s statement was followed by a long silence, the only sound being that of his pen writing on paper. You were wracking your brain for any possible evidence or material witness you could call but were coming up empty. 

_If only they could just look into my mind and verify that- oh my god I’m a fucking idiot._

“SENSEI!”

The old man jumped at your loud shout, knocking over his drink onto plenty of important papers in the process. Gifting you with a look of absolute defeat, Danzo prompted you to continue speaking.

“What if a Yamanaka mind walks me and the bitch? We can get Fū to henge into another Yamanaka to make sure no ROOT secrets are dug up. If he presents himself as a third party, someone with no reason to lie, then I’d be proven innocent and given back my reputation. Then I can sue Sakura for defamation of character! I get back my reputation and I get rich! Oh my God I’m a fucking idiot, why didn’t I think of this sooner?”

Hearty laughter followed your revelation, sensei was bent over his desk, in tears while laughing. You felt happiness swell inside of you at the sight of your sensei laughing, you really did love this man like a grandfather.

“Very well Ayumi-chan, I’ll call the council together this evening and implore them to retry your case. I will also inform Fū of his task. Now run along, you haven’t yet seen your family and I’m sure they want to ask you how the conference went.”

Nodding along to your sensei’s words, you quickly rearranged yourself to a sitting position on his couch before standing and making your way to the door. Just before opening it you remembered something that had been on your mind for a while. 

“Sensei, when Sai checks back in with you, he will tell you that the mission was a failure. Uchiha Sasuke still lives but please know that he acted on my orders. If you wish to punish anyone for this, punish me.”

“My child, I knew the mission would not succeed from the very beginning. You need not worry about being punished or me punishing Sai.”

“Mmm I see, I ask that you allow Sai some time to himself away from ROOT. He seemed distant and almost shaken on our way home, he might be burning himself out.”

“I’ll keep that in mind Ayumi-chan. Thank you for looking out for your future organization, I’ve raised you well.’’

 _That you have, sensei. That you have indeed._

***

“Sweet pea, you need to eat more. You’re at a pivotal age for growth and you’ve barely grown at all. You barely reach my hip, at your age Shikamaru was already near my waist!”

“Odds are I won’t grow to be very tall, childhood illness tends to stunt growth. Eating more won’t make me grow in height mom, I’ll only get fat.” 

You were pushing the food on your plate in circles while your mother prepared a bento box for your father. Only you and your mother were home, your brother was away on a mission but hopefully would be returning later today and your father was working in his jounin office. 

Your mother was watching you like a hawk though a quick glance at the clock mounted on the wall had her cursing and rushing into the master bedroom. You used the time alone wisely and dumped your remaining food into the trash. When your mother returned, you were already standing on your step stool and washing your now empty plate. 

“Nara Ayumi, what have I told you about wasting your food?”

“Ugh not to?”

“Then why do you keep doing it? There are children out there who are starving, who eat less than what you did in a week and yet you still decide to throw out food. Why?”

“I served myself the amount I knew I could eat comfortably, you were the one to decide that my portions were too little and stacked more food on my plate.”

“You barely eat as it is Ayumi-chan, if you eat any less then you’ll fade away. Don’t you want a nice full figure?”

At your mother's question you turned a constipated face to her.

“ _A nice figure?_ Mom, I'm five what the hell?!”

Light laughter followed you outburst, your mother was fastening her hospital uniform as she made her way to you. You allowed her to pick you up, curling into her as she spoke softly to you.

“I’m kidding sweet pea, I’m kidding. I want you to be in tip top shape before your surgery, ya know. Though I do have to say, you should enjoy your childhood while you can Ayumi-chan. If you’re anything like me then puberty will hit you earlier rather than later, by the time I was ten I was already sporting B cup breasts.”

Again you made a face to show your displeasure only this time you paired it with a loud groan. Your mother ignored your horror as she set you down near the back door and handed you the bento box she had prepared.

“Now then, I’m running late so I need you to deliver this to your father for me alright?”

“Noooo, why do I have to do it? You’re already on your way out.”

“Tsk, just when I hoped your father's laziness hadn’t been passed onto you. You will do it because I’m telling you to! Now go before I decide to invite more people to your party tomorrow!”

With that last shout, your mother all but threw you outside, your sandals joining only a few seconds later. 

_Fucking hell, how she goes from sweetheart to devil in the span of a second is beyond me. Now I have to actually leave the house and walk to the center of the village...what a drag._

Strapping on your sandals, you picked up your father’s lunch and begrudgingly made your way to the village center. 

***

While walking towards your father’s office you noticed two jounin loitering outside his door. A quick look over of both men revealed them to be Shiranui Genma and Namiashi Raidō, two men who used to play with you when you were still in diapers and had weaseled their way into your heart. Smiling widely you called out to both men.

“Genma-kun, Raidō-kun!”

Two heads whipped around and searched for the person who had called them, when they looked down and found you they both broke into large grins.

“Ah it’s little Ayumi-chan! Kami, look at how pretty you are, I would say you’ve grown but you’re still about the same size as you were like a year ago. Maybe you’ll just stay this tiny for li- OW! Genma what the fuck was that for?”

“With your incredible luck you’ll jinx her. Don’t worry squirt you’ll probably go through a massive growth spurt later.”

Both men reminded you of Steve and Tony and it warmed your usually cold heart, though, you were quickly brought back from your memories when they turned to look back at your father’s office door.

“Genma-kun, Raidō-kun, why are you loitering in front of my father’s door?”

A trickle of sweat ran down Raidō’s nervous face. In his hands was a stack of papers with dates from over a month ago.

 _Ah late paperwork, yeah dad’s gonna kill em._

Just as he opened his mouth to speak, Genma jumped and his face lit up.

“I’m a genius. Raidō, buddy, we’re gonna live another day. Hey baby Nara how does spending the day with your two favorite uncles sound?”

From the other side of the door a loud thud was heard, it was obvious your father could hear the conversation. Knowing this and that Genma was speaking about himself and his best friend you decided to tease him before giving in.

“I’m gonna spend the day with Choza-oji and Inoichi-oji?”

Loud laughter echoed from behind the door and both males slumped in defeat. Laughing lightly you reached up and took the stacks of paper from both men, maneuvering your father’s lunch to sit on top of it all, before telling them to wait for you outside. Opening the door you skipped towards the massive desk. Your father was standing near his window smoking a cigarette. 

When he noticed it was you who opened the door, he quickly put out and flicked away his cancer stick. You knew he was an avid smoker, his clothes reeked of it but ultimately it didn’t bother you. Medical ninjutsu could reverse any lung damage caused by smoke inhalation. Regardless, you knew your mother didn’t like it when he smoked in front of you so now you had fresh blackmail material. 

Plopping the giant stack of papers you gave your father no time to explain himself before beginning your childish rant.

“Ooh I’m gonna tell mom! You know she doesn’t like it when you smoke so you’re gonna get in trouble!”

Speeding towards you he quickly picked you up and shushed you. He knew you would definately rat him out so he had to find a way to persuade you not to. 

“Mah mah my little shadow, how about we keep this between us? I’ll buy you an ice cream today if you keep this secret.”

“Ice cream everyday on your way home from work for a month and it’s a deal.”

Your father sighed and began to mutter.

“By the end of the month you’ll be as big as Choza..”

“I’M TELLING MOM YOU CALLED ME FAT AND I'M TELLING CHOZA OJI WHAT YOU SAID!”

“No! No, no, no, shhhhh I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean it. Yes I’ll buy you whatever you want for a month just please don’t tell your mother or Choza anything.”

Howling laughter from Genma and Raidō had your father glaring at his door. Before he could stalk towards it and beat the two jounin black and blue, you hopped out of his arms and ran to the door.

“I’m keeping you to your word! Also I’m spending the day with Raidō and Genma so you can just put my ice cream in the freezer for when I get home. Love you papa!”

Your father stuttered out a quick “What?” but you were already out the door. Both jounin had tears running down their faces from laughing and were more than happy to take you out. Raidō had picked you up and put you on his broad shoulders as the three of you walked out of the hokage tower. Weaving through the streets of the village you noticed that it was busier than usual. The normal crowd of citizens had seemingly doubled and you were curious as to why.

“Raidō-kun, why is it so crowded? Is there a celebration happening?”

“Nah some travelling performers are gonna be in town or the next three days. They’re supposed to be really good so tickets have already sold out. From what I’ve heard their theme is ‘cats’?”

“Cats?”

“Yeah I heard it’s weird as shit but apparently really good. Hey baby Nara, how about we go see how packed the barbeque place is?”

“Yeah that sounds okay with me Raidō-kun so long as it’s okay with Genma-kun.”

The senbon user nodded and teased you for your formality. Walking through the village you were captivated by the happy atmosphere. In your old life you had travelled the world but you never were able to enjoy it, even towards the end when the Avengers initiative was dissolved you had stayed vigilant and monitored the wellbeing of the people, completely giving up on taking vacation time. 

Now you were in the same boat, most of your day was completely spent at your home, your family wasn’t one that liked leaving the compound, they much rather would stay at home and your nights were filled with rigorous training with Danzo-sensei. 

When the two jounin passed by a clothing store catered towards children they stopped and released squeals. In the window of the shop was...an outfit. Khaki corduroy overalls with a dark green shirt underneath was proudly displayed. You cringed at the horrible outfit and prayed that the jounin would have some sort of pride and not enter the store. Almost as if they had heard your thoughts both men rushed inside, bring you with them.

They threw countless outfits at you to try on and ended up buying a mountain of clothes and shoes. By the end of the ordeal you were dressed in said horrible outfit paired with a small backpack to carry the storage scrolls all of the clothes were sealed into. Despite being relieved of your shinobi duties, you still wore fitted dark pants and plain shirts. Being in these types of clothes accentuated your age and left people cooing at you, something you found unnecessary and demeaning. 

Walking through the crowded streets in such childish clothing with two grinning jounin led to many stares from bystanders. You sighed but figured it was a rather sweet gesture from both men that they spent so much time and money on your wardrobe. Since it was now later in the evening the already crowded streets seemed to be filled to the brim with people. 

Turning the corner revealed a packed Akimichi barbeque restaurant, there was even a crowd waiting outside. Raidō moved you to Genma’s shoulders before rushing inside and asking for the wait time. Waiting for the scarred man led to you and Genma to engage in a trivia game, if you got more than three answers wrong then you would have to pay for your own dinner but if you got them all right then Raidō would pay for your dinner. By the time Raidō came back you had a win streak of twenty seven. 

“Okay so, the wait time for a table is over an hour, I even pulled out the “I have a starving toddler” excuse but Shitō-san wouldn’t budge. Odds are that most places are going to be packed since there’s an influx of travellers. Hey! How about we take baby Nara to the Wet Boar? There’s always space there and the food is pretty good.”

You had never heard of the Wet Boar and were thoroughly curious. Genma on the other hand smacked Raidō upside his head and called him stupid.

“Are you dumb? Ayumi is five years old and also NOT a chunin or jounin. The Wet Boar is not a place she should be going to.”

“Ah c’mon Genma don’t be such a wet blanket! She’ll be fine, we aren’t going to leave her alone and if anything that’s the safest place for her to be. Who could get hurt in a room full of jounin?”

The two bickered for another minute before Genma’s stomach growled loudly. Giggling to yourself you cheered when he relented and the three of you set off to the jounin and anbu district. When you neared a dingy and ghetto street the two jounin slowed before stopping completely in front of a rundown house. 

Raidō knocked in some sort of code and a burly man opened the door. He recognized the two jounin but gave you a scrutinized look. 

“Really Genma? You don’t come around here for a few months and you come back with a kid? Who would let your goofy ass knock them up?”

Raidō snorted and made a poor attempt to hide his laughter while Genma starred unwaveringly back at the mountain of a man. 

“Haha very fucking funny Keisuke, let us in we’re starving.”

“You really think I’m gonna let a little kid in here? Don’t you have any sort of parental instinct?”

“She’ll be fine, she’s really mature for her age. Now c’mon man, let us in.”

“...If she ends up traumatized we aren’t responsible. Kid, I’m really sorry you have this dumbass for a dad.”

Hiding your smile behind Genma’s bandana the three of you entered the building. Your eyes flew open when you took in the dim lighting and elegant interior, there were multiple chandeliers hanging from the ceiling along with multiple naked women. There was a pulsating beat echoing throughout the building and it smelled heavily of alcohol and sex. While the two jounin appeared unaffected their bodies had stiffened momentarily, as if they hadn’t expected such a sight. 

A woman in a perverted bunny costume came up to your group to ask if you all were interested in their _preferred_ seating. When asked she elaborated that they had recently booked a dance performance and that it was highly reviewed. Both jounin agreed to that seating and asked for a booth with a clear view, their rationale was that hopefully a dance routine would help you forget the very naked women dangling from the roof. 

Being seated in a booth right in front of a curtained stage, another woman in a bunny costume came and handed out menus, turns out they don't have a kids menu. Deciding to play it safe you ordered a cherry soda and overpriced glorified grilled cheese with a cup of broccoli soup. Genma and Raidō had decided to share a pizza and ordered two bottles of sake as well as a few rounds of shots. 

While they were ordering your eyes drifted from table to table, stopping at one in the far right corner. The waitress seemed to be taking a shinobi’s order when all of a sudden he handed her a wad of cash. Pocketing the money the woman disappeared underneath the table and moments later the shinobi was throwing his head back and smiling widely. It was difficult to notice because of the dim lighting and the music drowned out any sound they were making but you weren’t stupid. 

Waiting for your food to be brought out, you tried making conversation with the two men, though they weren’t able to maintain anything too deep because they were nervously watching the inappropriate scene from the far right table. It made you almost laugh, they really seemed to have not expected this place to be so raunchy. 

When the food and drinks arrived you had to admit that it was delicious. Focused on eating you didn’t notice the surrounding tables turn their attention towards the hidden stage until the music cut out and the lights dimmed even more. Now, in almost complete darkness, a spotlight was shone on the curtain hiding the stage. A booming voice introduced the name of the performance as “Alice in Wonderland” and the curtain pulled back only to reveal a dozen dancing poles.

One by one the characters of the traditional “Alice in Wonderland” appeared, each portrayed as a butt naked woman with minimal face and body paint. The audience was absolutely losing their minds, and you were too for that matter. While they were loving the show for it’s errotisicm, you found it completely hilarious how twisted the entire scene was. The intensity of the blush spreading over Raidō and Genma also added to your fun. The performance included many close up views of vaginas and butts as well as complimentary lap dances for those in the _preferred_ seating. 

Having a grown woman try to seduce and hump you almost gave you an asthma attack from how hard you were laughing. Your two guardians were frantically trying to get you to look away while also getting a special dance and it really was just too much. Halfway through the show you heard Genma order a dozen more shots and vaguely you wondered if they could really handle their alcohol that well.

Newsflash: they couldn’t. By the end of the show both men were blackout drunk and in no condition to take you home. The majority of their food was still untouched so you went to town on it. The first to leave the booth was Raidō, with claims of having to use the restroom he wobbly stood and staggered off into the dark. Thirty five minutes later you figured he had either gotten lost or passed out. Ten minutes after that Genma got pulled away by a group of jounin, he yelled that he would only be away for a minute but an hour later you figured he had the same fate as Raidō. 

You didn’t mind having to eat alone, though your anxiety did spike when the waitress brought the check. You knew you could pay for your own meal and maybe the pizza but the alcohol had added an extra eighty dollars you simply did not have.

Your hands shook as you brought out your small yellow sunflower wallet, bringing out the amount for your half and the pizza left your wallet empty. Nervously you looked around, everyone seemed to be having a good time enjoying drinks and the dancers but you felt as if you wanted to cry. You hated feeling vulnerable, and the odds that if you left the tab unpaid then the majority of the shinobi here would beat you because they were too drunk was extremely high. 

When the waitress came around to collect the check you were shaking like a leaf as well as close to tears. Quietly explaining your predicament the waitress took down the names of Raidō and Genma and assured you that you only had to pay for your portion. Relieved, you did just that. Once you were debt free you went back to eating the leftover pizza and were happy to know they had left the majority of their sake and a few shots behind. 

Your father was going to kill Raidō and Genma, that was a given, so what was holding you back from having a bit more fun? 

Back with the Avengers you had been tied with Barnes for highest alcohol tolerance, now you wondered if that carried into this world. Taking a large gulp of the sake you were surprised at the sweetness it spread on your tongue. Deciding to not let Raidō and Genma’s money go to waste you downed the few shots as well. One was definitely whiskey, another was tequila, and the last two were a variation of flavored vodka. After downing the shots you went back to the pizza and your grilled cheese, nothing was going to go to waste if you had any say in it. Finishing your grilled cheese you drank the sake in place of your cherry soda, the flavors mixed better. 

You had no idea how long you spent in the club but by now your eyesight was blurry and your hearing was distorted. You knew you should start the trek home but the moment you stood an overwhelming need to pee sobered you a bit. You made sure your wallet was in your backpack and left a kind note and tip to the waitress before exploring the club. You walked slowly around the club, trying to find the bathrooms but failing miserably. 

By the time you decided to ask someone for help you were maybe seconds away from wetting yourself. Tugging the sleeve of a chunin who was drinking at a table with friends, you prayed she would help you. When said chunin turned and looked down to you a gasp left their lips, the other chunin and jounin also turned to see what had elicited the reaction. 

“Iruka, what’s up man?”

“Ayumi-chan, what are you doing in here?”

_Oh you’re a man, oops my bad. Wait how do you know my name? Let’s see Iruka...Iruka..Iruka..the mission desk dude? Oh! Shikamaru’s academy sensei. Yes, yes I remember now._

At Iruka’s outburst the mess of jounin and chunin all stood to catch a glimpse of the usually stoic child Nara. Resorting to your last attempt to hold in your liquid you began to embarrass yourself in the worst way possible. You began to do the potty dance.

“Do you know where the potty is? I really really need to go pee.”

Maybe this man was a father himself because he immediately scooped you up and ran to the nearest restroom until he plopped you right in front of a urinal. Confused and slightly disgusted you whined loudly and pointed towards a stall.

“Ayumi-chan what’s wrong? Use a urinal if you need to go number one. The stalls are only for number two.”

“No! I’m not a boy, I don’t have a peepee. I need a potty to tinkle!”

By now your drunk self was crying messily. You were about to piss yourself and Raidō and Genma had left you alone and you were probably going to get in trouble when you get home. Perhaps when you had sobered up you would apologize and get Iruka a fruit basket but for now you just wanted to pee. 

***

Hearing little Nara Ayumi say that she needed to “tinkle” had thrown Iruka for a loop. Hearing her cry that he didn’t have a “peepee” had made him pause for a moment before the cogs in his brain began to turn and his eyes widened. Picking up the child he rushed out of the men's room and ran across the club until he reached the women's restroom. 

Not caring about self image he threw open the door and plopped the girl into an empty stall. The girl fumbled a bit with her overalls but assured him that she could do it all on her own. Waiting outside the girls stall was a bit embarrassing but Iruka would never forgive himself if something happened to her because of his bashfulness.

When the girl had finished Iruka had to help her reach the soap and sink, as well as fix her shirt and overalls. 

_Who would bring a kid to a club? Especially the kid of Nara Shikaku._

Walking hand in hand with the toddler, Iruka brought her towards his table, all eyes were on him. 

“Iruka, what the fuck was that?”

“Language Kotetsu, there’s a child present! Ayumi-chan came up to me and asked me to take her to the restroom. I have no idea where she came from or who she may be with but I think she might be drunk?”

Iruka sat the child in his lap and handed her a cup of water. The child's eyes were dilated and unfocused and she reeked of alcohol. Whoever had brought a baby to a place like this was going to pay hell from him later. Izumo leaned forward in his seat, his eyes were squinted as he took in the small child in Iruka’s hold. 

“Holy shit! That’s Nara Ayumi, Tsunade’s apprentice and princess to the Nara clan! I knew she looked freakishly familiar! What the fuck is she doing in here?”

At his words the rest of the table gasped at began to mumble amongst themselves. The girl had obviously heard Izumo’s outburst and began to cry.

“I’m not a f-freak. I’m Ayumi. W-why are y-you callin me a freak?”

Iruka glared at his friend and tried to calm the child in his arms. There was no doubt about it now, the kid was hammered. Completely disappointed in whoever had given the child alcohol, Iruka stood up. Sighing, he bid his friends goodbye and informed them that he would be dropping off Shikaku’s kid. 

Walking towards the entrance of the bar he had to step side step passed Raidō, who was half naked and making out with one of the waitresses. The girl gasped at the sight and Iruka pushed her face into his chest to shield her from any more inappropriate scenes. Walking into the cold, crisp air of Konoha Iruka couldn’t help but let out a content sigh, the club was so stuffy and hot. Taking to the roofs, he paused to wrap his chunin vest around the girls shivering form before taking off again. 

“So how exactly did you end up at the club? I can’t imagine Keisuke letting you walk right in.”

The girl was quiet and clearly distraught but answered anyways.

“I was taken there. They said it was a good place to eat and it wouldn’t be packed.”

“Who took you there?”

“Genma-san and Raidō-san...they left before they could finish their food though. Raidō-san said he had to pee but never came back to the table. Genma-san got pulled away by friends.”

Unmitigated rage filled Iruka, Raido and Genma had brought a child into an adult club only to leave her there completely alone. Where anything could have happened to her? Those two would definitely be hearing from Iruka as well as Shikaku and the Hokage. 

“What about alcohol? Who bought you alcohol?”

“I wanted to taste what they were having. They got really happy after drinking it and when they left I felt so alone and sad..I wanted to be happy like them so I had the last bit they left behind.” 

“I see. I’m sorry they left you alone Ayumi-chan. They should have never brought you to such a place at all.”

“The food was good but the naked people were really gross.”

“I’m sorry you had to see all of that.”

The child didn’t respond after that so Iruka could only assume she had fallen asleep. Arriving at the Nara compound was a weird experience for Iruka. He had never visited Shikamaru’s home simply because the boy never misbehaved too badly or struggled in school, so this was a first for him. Asking a passing clansman where the clan head’s residence was located was a bit jarring but he found his way just fine. 

He lightly knocked on the wooden door and waited for someone to open, lightly shifting the toddler in his hold. The girl was gazing up at him intensely before speaking.

“You’re really pretty Iruka-sensei. I thought you were a woman when I first asked you for help.”

At the confession Iruka couldn’t help but burst out laughing. As much as this girl looked like her brother, she acted nothing like him. Where Shikamaru was very private and socially awkward, she seemed to be very open and a social butterfly. Before he could thank the girl for the compliment the door opened to a tired looking Shikamaru. His eyes widened when he noticed who was standing on the other side of the door.

“Iruka-sensei, what brings you here at this hour? Wait imouto?! Where have you been, parents have been waiting for you to come home hours ago! Was she causing trouble sensei?”

“Ah quite the opposite actually Shikamaru-kun. Are your parents home? I need to talk to them in regards to your imoutos whereabouts.”

“Yeah they’re waiting in the living room, please come in Iruka-sensei. I can take my sister, thank you for returning her.”

Iruka gladly handed over the mini Shikamaru and couldn’t help but coo at the fond smile he sent his sister. In return the girl began to babble about the day's events to him and made wild hand movements to emphasize certain parts. 

When the three reached the living room the two Nara clan heads were waiting with fresh tea. Iruka bowed and took a seat in front of the two while Shikamaru sat on the sofa with the now quiet girl. Shikaku was sending a blank stare towards his daughter which made her hide her face, he probably uses that face before scolding her.

“Shikaku-san, Yoshino-san, I’m sorry to intrude at such a late hour but I believe it to be important you know where your daughter has been. Were you aware she was spending the day with Raidō-san and Genma-san?”

Yoshino glanced nervously towards her husband but relaxed slightly when he nodded.

“Alright that calms me a bit. I don’t know the full details but about two hours ago a few friends and I decided to get together for a night out. We decided to go to the Wet Boar, I’m sure you’ve heard of it. Well, about twenty minutes ago your youngest asked me for directions to the restroom, inside the Wet Boar.”

At that sentence the father and mother’s eyes widened in shock, Shikamaru made a sort of choked noise as well but still no one spoke. Taking the silence as his queue to keep explaining Iruka continued.

“She couldn’t walk properly and reeked of alcohol so once she had done her business I brought her here. On the way back I asked her what she was doing in such a place and she informed me that Genma-san and Raidō-san took her there to eat. I’m not sure what else happened but she did comment on the bare women.”

If glares could kill then Iruka was sure the tea kettle would have been destroyed by Shikaku’s glare. A tense silence followed the revelation and Iruka began to worry that maybe he would get roped into the Nara’s fury.

“I’m going to kill those two idiots.”

Shikaku was a force to be reckoned with when he was angry, Iruka knew that for a fact. Seeing that same expression on his son terrified him and for a brief moment he felt pity for the two partying jounin. Yoshino turned and gathered her daughter in her arms, scrunching up her nose at the smell of alcohol. Gently she asked Ayumi for the full story. 

“...Are Raidō-kun and Genma-kun in trouble?”

“That depends on how you answer me Ayumi, I need you to tell us everything that happened tonight.”

“Well, we were gonna go eat barbeque but the wait was too long so Raidō-kun said he knew a place that had good food and it was called the Wet Boar. Genma-kun didn’t want to go but his tummy grumble really really loudly so he said fine and when we got there a bunch of women were naked and hanging from the ceiling and some lady in a really short rabbit costume came up to us and asked us if we wanted the special seating. I don’t think they knew what it meant but they said sure and so we were sat in front of a big stage that was covered by a big curtain. Then when we were ordering I saw a man pay a waitress a lot of money and then the waitress hid underneath the man's table and then the man started smiling really wide and then the food came and it was really good. I got a grilled cheese and soup and cherry soda and Raidō-kun and Genma-kun got a big pizza and special soda that came in two bottles and a bunch of mini cups of soda. Then when we were eating the lights went out and a really loud voice said that the show was about to begin and that it was called “Alice in Wonderland”. I thought it was gonna be the story momma told me but more naked women came out and started dancing on poles. It was really really cool! They were doing flips and hanging by their legs and it was awesome. Sometimes they would move their underwear to show their privates, though I don’t know why. Then they started getting off the stage and walking towards our booth. The lady playing the queen of hearts started dancing really close to me and tried sitting on me! It was weird but Raidō-kun and Genma-kun’s faces made it really funny. Then they ordered more mini sodas and then the show was over but some ladies stayed dancing. Then Raidō-kun said he had to go pee pee so he left but then he didn’t come back and then Genma-kun found some friends there and he left too. So I was left to eat alone. I got really scared though because the waitress came and left the bill and it was really really high so I could only pay for my food and pizza. I’m sorry momma I spent all my allowance. I thought I was gonna get in trouble because I couldn’t pay the full bill but that lady was really really nice and said I only had to pay for my food. Then I finished my cherry soda and I was sad that I was alone so I grabbed some of the special coda Raidō-kun and Genma-kun left and it tasted really bad. But then I remembered how happy they got after drinking it so I wanted to be happy too and so I drank it all and then the mini soda’s too. They were really bitter and after a while I couldn’t see well or hear well. When I wanted to leave I had to really use the bathroom but I couldn’t find it and a lot of people bumped into me and made me fall. But then I asked Iruka-sensei for help and he helped me and I thought he was a pretty girl but he was actually a boy. And then he thought I was a boy! And then he brought me here. And now I feel really sick, my head and tummy hurt.”

The girl was panting from her long rant and Iruka felt nothing but rage towards the two jounin. Though when his gaze landed on Shikaku’s he gulped, the man looked ready to kill. Shikaku sighed loudly before rubbing a hand down his face. The man looked tired. 

“I see. Thank you Iruka-sensei, if you hadn’t brought her back then who knows what would have happened. I will deal with the two dead men tomorrow. Is there anything else we should know sensei?”

Shikaku’s voice was devoid of emotion and Iruka found himself nervously sweating as he shook his head.

“No, Shikaku-san. I’m very sorry we had to meet again under these circumstances but I’m glad your daughter is safe. I wish her a speedy recovery and you some peace. I can see myself out, goodnight.”

And with that, Iruka fled the house.

***

Shikaku was sure that if he wasn’t feeling so defeated and done, he would be raging right now. Yoshino was upset but focused entirely on the drunk five year old while Shikamaru was in shock. Asuma had taken him to the Wet Boar when he turned sixteen and he never wanted to go back, knowing his baby sister had been there for hours, gotten drunk and gotten a lap dance made his head spin. 

Looking towards the drunk five year old, the three adults couldn’t help the growing amusement they felt. Ayumi-chan was always so serious, so careful to not show much emotion. The times she truly acted her age were few and far in between, anyone outside of immediate family and friends would never believe them if they spoke about it. 

It was more than a bit unnerving to see their usually stoic and mature child, slur a song and dance in front of them, all while smiling the widest smile she’s ever worn. When she started tugging on Shikamaru to join her, Shikaku and Yoshino couldn’t help but laugh. It was equally touching and hilarious to see their drunk daughter guilt trip her older brother into making a fool of himself. 

Only their daughter would be a happy go lucky drunk.

“What are we gonna do dad? I don’t think Iruka-sensei is gonna let this go, odds are he’s already reported it to the Hokage.”

“Tonight we stay here and try to make your sister’s first hangover as bearable as possible while also documenting all of her drunk antics, for memories. Tomorrow, you and I are going to go get your uncle and Inoichi and Choza and anyone else we can possibly find and we’re going to beat some sense into those two idiots and deal with the Hokage. That sounds alright with you?”

If Shikamaru was being completely honest then he would have liked to go beat them up right now but his sister was so adorable when she was acting her age. Shikamaru could barely remember the last time his sister acted so childishly, he was so used to seeing her blank face and emotionless voice that seeing her now, drunk, dancing and singing, made him tear up a bit. Ayumi kept up her performance long enough for Yoshino and Shikaku to take plenty of pictures and videos, all while Shikamaru hyped her up. 

But as all good things do, the night came to an end when Ayumi jumped up and wobbled towards the restroom. It would have been such an adorable sight if the circumstances had been different. Instead the Nara family sobered a bit when the sounds of the five year old vomiting violently reached them. Yoshino stood quickly to go help her daughter while Shikamaru and Shikaku cleaned up the living room.

When she had finished, Yoshino made sure to help her brush her teeth and quickly helped her shower. An hour later the toddler was squeaky clean and barely awake. Picking out one of the softest cotton pajama shirts and pants the young girl owned, Yoshino changed her daughter and brought her to the master bedroom. Laying the girl on her husband’s chest Yoshino left to get ready for bed as well. She kissed her eldest son goodnight and made her way towards her own room smiling fondly when she saw both of her loves asleep. 

Laying down she prayed that her husband and son wouldn’t go overboard tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's twelve thousand words for y'all. Not gonna lie, I'm losing motivation to write though I do have a few ideas I really want to try writing before deciding anything in regards to updates to this story.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for giving this story a chance! So far I'm planning maybe around 30 chapters? Who knows, we'll see where this fic takes us!


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